Slightly risque joke of the day

[mac56]

A therapist is leading a support group for mothers and their toddlers. The conversation turned to the mothers' obsessions and preoccupations.

"You see, we all have things we obsess about, that we think about day in and day out, and can't get off of our minds," the therapist said. Turning to the first mother, he said, "It's very clear to me that you're obsessed with food issues. And this is why you named your child Candy."

Turning next to the second mother, he continued, "And it's very clear to me that you're obsessed with money. This is why you named your child Penny."

The third mother stood up suddenly, took her child by the hand, and said, "Come on, Dick, we're leaving."

[iscooterliberally]

1. So this means that Gingrich's mom was a witch.

She turned him into a Newt, but he never got better. It really sucked for the rest of us too.

[PJMcK]

2. That was great

Keep 'em coning, mac 56.

[mitch96]

3. I love the things that snuck by the censors on live TV in the '50s

Groucho Marks was a classic at that. There was also a game show contestant that said something interesting when asked where was the most unusual place she ever had sex..

Oh Laudy!!

m

[Martin Eden]

4. "Come on, Dick, we're leaving."

"Your brothers Peter and John Thomas are waiting for us."

[mac56]

6. "We need to meet your sister Fanny."

[Martin Eden]

5. Two Trees and a Woodpecker

Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A small tree begins to grow between them, and the beech says to the birch, "Is that tree a son of a beech or a son of a birch?"

The birch says he cannot tell, but just then a woodpecker lands on the sapling.

The birch says, "Woodpecker, you are a tree expert. Can you tell if that is a son of a beech or a son of a birch?"

The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree and replies, "It is neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch. It is, however, the best piece of ash I have ever poked my pecker into."