Today I learned that my husband of almost 30 years

[Danmel]

Did not know that you do not have to buy the entire bunch of bananas.

So, who is up for banana bread later in the week??

[OnDoutside]

1. Sounds like a deeper issue there !

[Voltaire2]

2. He also probably doesn't know that anything

you eat in the store is free.

[mitch96]

37. And if you eat anything over the sink, it's calorie free!!

I had a girlfriend that thought when you cook something you just throw everything together at once..... needless to say the food she cooked was atrocious...
m

[missingthebigdog]

55. A man I dated many years ago

Had a minor panic attack when I ate some of the trail mix we had put in the cart. It was before computers were ubiquitous, at one of those grocery stores where you scooped the bulk product into a bag, weighed it, and marked it before you left the area.

I explained to him that there was no problem- we would pay for it at the register, it was already weighed, etc. Then I wandered down another aisle, and came back to find him munching away from a different bag.
I said, "what are you doing??"
He said, "You said it was okay! We are going to pay for it!"
It was birdseed. For my parrot.

[Kali]

63. !

probably fresher than the trail mix anyway!

[Crutchez_CuiBono]

3. Banana facts

If he did'nt know that then he probably does'nt know that at stores..USUALLY...theres racks under the display case w bananas ready to go out...most of which are greener and smaller and last longer than the ones left to rummage through on the viewing rack. I always pull the rack out underneath and get better/newer bananas. At 70 cents a pound (54 cents a pound when Obama was in office), you get bananas that last and aren't the size of a cucumber. imho.

[Phentex]

25. Never looked but I

buy the loose green ones that people seem to pull off. For some odd reason, I end up buying bananas three at a time. On the rare occasion one gets overripe before it gets eaten, I put it in the freezer for a smoothie.

[hlthe2b]

4. My sister had a friend who as an adult, mind you, did not know banks had branches

Last edited Sun Jun 3, 2018, 09:09 PM - Edit history (1)

(i.e., you didn't have to go to the same bank location every time), that oranges had SECTIONS (apparently had never peeled one) and several other bizarre aspects of common life...

LOL. what can you say?

[PoindexterOglethorpe]

38. My now ex husband, about four or five years into our marriage,

looked at the calendar early one November, and said in a truly vexed tone of voice, "Thanksgiving is on a Thursday AGAIN this year?"

[becca da bakkah]

48. The Ex Significant Other & I Went Through Something.....

.....similar every year. He would ask, when is Christmas this year? I'd say, December 25th. No, he'd say, I mean what day is it? I'd reply, Wednesday, Thursday...whatever it was that particular year. OK, and when is New Years? One week later. New Years is always one week after Christmas. Yes....but what DAY is that??

Every single freakin' year, for the 6 years we were together. I'd explain it to him, over and over, but it was always in one ear, and out the other!

OR.....
We'd be driving past a school zone, at 10 PM, and he would slow down to 25. I'd say you don't have to slow down, children aren't in school now. Besides, it says, "when children are present. Him: "does that mean present in the classroom?" Me: "Well, kids would hardly be present in the crosswalk at 10 PM". Him: Well, you never know"

Every. Single. Time.

[Rorey]

5. Made some this morning

But thanks anyway.

[TEB]

6. I'll bring the coffee

[grumpyduck]

7. Why guys shouldn't take phone messages

Hey, I'm one of them, but I'm totally behind this one:

Man leaves a note on the fridge for his wife. It says,

Honey, the Gyny Colleges called. Said your Pabst Beer is normal. I didn't know you liked beer.

[iwillalwayswonderwhy]

10. When we lived in n. California

A friend gave us directions to her house and my husband wrote them down, she said San Tomas, and my husband dutifully wrote “Santa Moss”.

[lunatica]

47. That's hysterical!

Whether it’s true or not.

[underpants]

8. Confession - it was only 8-10 years ago that realized that pineapples don't grow on trees

I think I equated them with coconuts for some reason.

[Dream Girl]

20. They don't?

[LeftInTX]

22. No

[Me.]

9. I Didn't Know That Either

Here we just break off what we want making sure to keep stems intact for better ripening...this is at both Trader Joe's and a Fairway grocery store.

[FuzzyRabbit]

11. My next door neighbor did not know

that when the electricity is out your toilet will still flush.

[csziggy]

18. That only works if you live in an area with metro utilities

In the country, when the electricity is out, you have no water and can't flush your toilet unless you pour water into the tank.

Oh - even in a town or city, if the electricity is out long enough, the water system may not be able to maintain pressure and there will not be water in the tank to flush the toilet.

[mercuryblues]

46. On a well system

you get 1 flush, without having to refill the tank. You cross your fingers and hope the power comes back on before you need to flush again.

[csziggy]

49. True - before the last two hurricanes, we planned ahead

Filled a big yard bucket full of water in our shower, next to the toilet, as well as several five gallon buckets. We made it through the outage from Irma but not the outage from Hermine the year before. Some friends got power back before we did and filled the yard bucket for us. They also lent us a generator, hooked up our refrigerator and freezer so we didn't lose any food, hooked up a window AC so we stayed comfortable, and took good care of us both weeks.

[Kali]

62. until a few years ago we were on a gravity system

as long as the tank was full we were good, stove is gas and can light with a match (not the oven though, it has a modern "safe" igniter bar) so other than lights and keeping fridge/freezers closed outages weren't a big deal. heck I had a laptop and a cell modem then, could even play on the internets!

[Me.]

32. Um Not If You Live In A Bldg

and the pumps stop working

[rurallib]

56. Back in the old antenna days for TV

I would scare folks by taking both ends of the lead wire in my bare hands and pretend I was getting electrocuted.

[Ohiogal]

12. When we were first married

My husband thought cheesecake was cake with cheese in it. (like cheddar cheese).

[rickford66]

13. We knew some newlyweds who thought if you had checks left ...

you still had money in the account. Yes ... they found out.

[eppur_se_muova]

50. That is *literally* an old "Blondie" cartoon. nt

[rickford66]

51. Definitly a true story.

I actually the the girl out a few times and gave up because she was so vague. On the last date I had with her I asked someone else to take her home. The girl that fixed us up, told me about the check story after she got married.

[TexasBushwhacker]

53. I had a boss like that

Being his bookkeeper was not fun.

[Frustratedlady]

14. I had asked my former neighbor if she ever watched Downton Abbey and she said...

No, my husband bought a sports TV and they don't get that channel. (All he ever watches is sports and she thought those were the only channels you could get. I mean, even if her husband told her that, wouldn't you think????)

[Danmel]

15. Maybe a cable package?

[Frustratedlady]

16. No, he just dominated the TV and it was never off sports channels.

He snowed her a lot.

[LeftInTX]

23. Are they still married?

[Frustratedlady]

26. Actually, over 50 years.

I never figured out if it was true love or that she let him think he was boss. I always got a kick out of their relationship.

Quite the marriage.

[matt819]

17. What's his stance on the cherries in the zipper bags?

[Danmel]

21. I explained the by the pound thing to him.

He's actually very smart but doesn't do the shipping or cooking. Kind of like when George H.W. Bush was surprised by the scanners in the supermarket.

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

19. He knew.

He also knew that over-ripe bananas, by some magic, turn into banana bread. Or banana nut bread.

We all know.

Count me in, I'll bring some Bourbon for the coffee.

[NNadir]

24. This has been my approach for many years.

I get all things banana, banana pancakes, banana bread.

In fact, I knew my wife was receptive to being romanced by me when - in the time she and I were formally "just friends" - she made me banana cake for my birthday after I whined that one thing I really missed about my mother was that she made banana cake for my birthday.

She made me a special birthday dinner, presented me with a banana cake and, as a present, two tickets to see Dustin Hoffman as Willy Loman on Broadway.

I've been 35 years at buying too many bananas, and I still love bananas and the woman who has prepared so many wonderful treats with them.

[SummerSnow]

27. My husband doesn't know that the hamper is 6 ft from him

[rurallib]

57. !

[Sancho]

28. Sounds like he has all the qualifications to run for office!!

Put him on the ballot!

[InAbLuEsTaTe]

29. Not true... never have, never will.

[Freddie]

30. Friends husband

Would get cash from the ATM, see the bank balance and "hey, we have a lot of $$!" and spend it. Did not grasp the concept of "checks that haven't cleared yet" or scheduled online payments that will happen before the next payday. He must have figured it out as years later they're still married.

[TexasBushwhacker]

31. You can slow down ripening by wrapping the stems in plastic

I like bananas to be a bit green, so I pull them all apart and wrap each stem in a little plastic wrap. It buys me a day or 2.

[pnwest]

34. I confess I was well into my 40's before I learned you didn't

have to buy the whole bag of grapes.....

[Kaleva]

41. That's why I don't buy grapes

Who knows how many hands and how dirty they were digging in that bag. And one is expected to clean them by just rinsing them off with water?

I can at least wash other fruit such as apples with soap and water and then rinse them off.

[MontanaMama]

52. Soak your grapes

in a bowl of ice cold water and two tablespoons of apple cider vinegar. Jostle them in the water for a minute or two and rinse them. Easy peazy and you’ll have clean grapes.

[Kaleva]

54. Thanks!

[northoftheborder]

35. Neither did my son of 50+ years

He was admonishing me for breaking off just what I need. They are sold by the pound here, not by the number!

[Nay]

36. A former coworker of mine did not know that New Mexico was a state in the U.S.

[PoindexterOglethorpe]

39. LOTS of people don't know that New Mexico is a state in the U. S.

The state magazine has a section called "One of our Fifty is Missing." Here's a link to some of the many anecdotes. https://www.newmexico.org/nmmagazine/articles/post/one-of-our-fifty-is-missing-feb-2014-84633/

[Nay]

40. Unreal!!

[mahatmakanejeeves]

43. What was wrong with the old one? NT

[PoindexterOglethorpe]

45. LOL!

If ever I tell someone I live in New Mexico, and they don't think they've heard of it, I'll ask, "What do you think keeps Arizona and Texas from crashing into each other?"

There are even stories of the Post Office or UPS thinking that New Mexico is a foreign country, which is truly appalling.

[kwassa]

42. My sister was convinced that a wolverine was a female wolf.

[llmart]

44. My son thought...

baby carrots in the bag were a different variety of carrot that never got very big.

[Brother Buzz]

58. My grandpa would have told you they were just starting to get ripe

He grew up in rural California and was introduced to the banana around the turn of the last century; he probably never saw a yellow banana back in those days. He learned to nip the end off a black banana and squeeze the sweet fluid into his mouth, not unlike squeezing a toothpaste tube.

'She Who Must be Obeyed' tosses overripe bananas into the freezer, then pulls them out to make banana bread at her leisure, and my pleasure.

[dembotoz]

59. Aldi they come in a bag and are priced and preweighed by the bag

So ur husband is correct
And banana bread is wonderful

[MissMillie]

60. You don't even have to buy the whole bag of grapes!

My guy bought a bunch of bananas last week. Thankfully, we managed to eat them all before they passed on us. (Made some banana pancakes, and that helped.)

[Kali]

61. my Safeway sells key limes by the piece.

I'm 50 miles from the border, who the hell buys a few limes? they should be sold by the pound. EVERY freaking time, they gotta count the limes. I don't buy less than 40 at a time. dumbasses!

they sell the damn watermelons by the piece, but not tiny little limes that you need dozens at a time.

[Heidi]

64. "Do you guys have Fourth of July in Switzerland?"

Question from a family member shortly after I moved here.