Eric Trump Aims Laser Pointer At Don Jr. While Flicking Lights On And Off To Erase Memory Of Russia
Meeting
https://politics.theonion.com/eric-trump-aims-laser-pointer-at-don-jr-while-flicking-1827932160
WASHINGTONIn response to resurfacing allegations that cast doubt on his brothers version of the 2016 Trump Tower meeting, Eric Trump aimed a laser pointer at Donald Jr. Friday while rapidly flicking a light switch up and down in order to erase all his memories of the incident. Come on, Don, keep your eyes super wide open so the memory ray can work, said the 34-year-old, shining a Trump Organization-branded laser pointer into Donald Jr.s eyes while repeatedly shouting You dont remember the bad stuff! You dont remember the bad stuff! It might hurt for a little bit while the memories are going away, but dont move or it could give you total amnesia. Here, drink this, too. Its a forgetfulness potion I made out of all the pills in Dads medicine cabinet. He takes em all the time and he never remembers nothing. At press time, a frustrated Eric lost patience and instead opted to use a hammer to smash the memories out of Donald Jr.s brain.