Write something with "Alan Dershowitz's underwear" inserted(sic!) into it...

[First Speaker]

...I'll start. "Do you expect me to talk?"

"No, Mr Bond! I expect you to die!"

"If you kill me, they'll just send 008 to take my place!"

"Let us hope he'll be more successful!"

(Bond struggles, then gasps out a last trump card) "But I'm wearing Alan Dershowitz's underwear!"

(Goldfinger looks stunned, then glares at Bond. He orders the laser beam to be switched off.)

"You have interfered with my plans for the last time, Mr Bond!"

[Sneederbunk]

1. When this is all over, Alan Dershowitz's underwear will be on display in the Smithsonian.

[ProudLib72]

2. I pledge allegiance to Alan Dershowitz's underwear

And to the pedophilia for which it stands
One nation, under tRump
With liberty and justice for rich white dudes

[MLAA]

3. You win

I concede, I will not even submit an entry in this contest 🙂

[5X]

4. He had to tweet about this...where is that phone.

He didn't want to grab it with the Colonel's grease all over his hands
so he grabbed the first thing handy to wipe off his hands, Alan Dershowitz's underwear.

[Brother Buzz]

5. While wearing his Hunter Pence underwear, Superman discovered....

with his X-Ray vision, Alan Dershowitz doesn't wear underwear

[panader0]

6. Alan Dershowitz kept his underwear on.

On his head. But because his waist was bigger than his head,
Alan Dershowitz's underwear slipped down over his face.