I was so excited at the prospect of getting new roommates

[Rorey]

I forgot to put a cup under the coffee maker and coffee ran all over.

But the real point is, I'm probably going to get roommates!!! I think one of my sons and his wife and daughter and two cats will be moving in for possibly six months.

It does mean that I'll again be "grandma in the basement", like it was when another son and his family moved in for nine months a couple of years ago. But I'm great with that. The basement is finished, and it's nice enough, and quiet and private. Last time I set it us like a little apartment, and was very comfortable.

We'll need to re-do the cat situation because their two are strictly indoor cats, whereas mine come and go as they please. We made it work when the other son moved in with his huge dog, so I'm sure mine will quickly adjust to giving up the upstairs again.

I'm very excited!!! I missed a lot of quality grandma time during quarantine. It'll be great to make up that time.

[Croney]

1. They are so lucky to have you!

(I remind my grandkids of that, lol)

Enjoy this time with them. Time passes so fast. Congrats!

[Rorey]

2. Thank you!

Both of those sons tried to encourage me to sell my house after my divorce and move into a smaller place. I'm glad I didn't listen.

My son was worried about being a imposition, but nothing could be further from the truth. I adore both of my daughters-in-law, and I don't have to tell you how special those grandkids are to me.

[Croney]

4. Grandma's house is home.

[Rorey]

9. LOL, that's pretty true. NT

[ret5hd]

18. So...uhhhm...jail it is, then.

[SWBTATTReg]

3. You do have such a positive vibe about this situation, that's so nice and good to hear. Most of the

responses I have heard over the years when a child and family are moving back into the family household have been somewhat mixed, some where the parents insisted that they weren't perpetual babysitters, etc., (and they aren't, the parents deserve a life too), being taken advantage of, via demands to babysit, etc. by children, the smart parents made very clear that they weren't perpetual babysitters, that they would babysit for short periods of time, with clear guidelines, etc.

Make sure you carve out your path in life too, and associate priority to your needs too.

[Rorey]

8. Very good points!

It's not much of a concern in this case. They're both very considerate, and they also love doing family things with their little girl. I'm sure they'll do the occasional "date night", and that's fine with me.

When my other son and his family stayed with me while they were building their new house, I could probably count on my fingers how many times I took care of their son. On top of that, I didn't do a lick of housework the entire time they were here. They did everything, and they're super clean people, so it was pretty great. When they moved into their new house, I asked my DIL what days she was going to come and clean my house because I forgot how. We both laughed, but I'm not so sure I was actually kidding.

It's not a for-sure thing yet, but it's sounding like it might happen. The only thing I'm worried about is how much it's going to hurt when they leave, because they'll likely be moving back to the east coast.

Another bonus of them coming here will be that I can actually take a little vacation myself because they'll take care of my cats while I'm gone. I

[SWBTATTReg]

11. You are truly so lucky to have, without really asking, such a considerate and caring family.

Some of the stories I've heard from some of my good friends have been horror stories in their families taking advantage of them (thank goodness not very often).

My best to you all!

[Rorey]

14. Thank you

My best friend has that situation in her family. Her stepson and his wife show up and act like they forgot those kids they brought with them are theirs. My friend had to finally let them know that it wasn't okay.

When my other son and his family stayed with me, somehow there got to be a pretty good scratch on my hardwood floors. My son said they'd pay to get the floors refinished. I told him I would just buff it out, or something. Stuff happens. I have a family and everything just isn't going to be perfect all the time, and that's okay. Funny, but I don't even remember anymore where that scratch even is, so it must not have been too bad.

[IbogaProject]

16. Rub walnut into scratches

Rub walnut into scratches if it happens again. It basically erases most wood care sins. Also works on water rings from beverages. Raw and unsalted of course.

[niyad]

20. A matching crayon works, too.

[vanlassie]

5. My grandkids are here this weekend for the first time in two years due to lock down etc.

So thrilled.

[Rorey]

10. There's nothing better than grandkids

I'm always thrilled to watch new grandparents come to the realization of how awesome it is.

[mopinko]

6. nothing better for a kid than a live in grandma.

i kept the big house, too. i doubt any of them will land back here, but who knows.
i've been thinking about trying to get another roomie. i've had a couple since the divorce, neither of which were great, but...

not rly built to be alone tho. plus i'd like someone to find my body before the buzzards start circling if i croak alone.

[Rorey]

12. I thought about a roommate

But I think I really am built to be alone. I love it.

I DID tell the kids that somebody better touch base with me at least every other day to be sure I'm still alive. I had a tenant who died and wasn't discovered for up to 10 days. Not something I want my family to have to deal with at all.

[Hortensis]

7. :) Congratulations, Rorey. That's such happy news.

I'd be thrilled to move into our basement and have a new baby in the house, and a chance to help our kids. Unfortunately we're between generations, and it'll be some years before our next wave of babies starts up.

[Rorey]

13. I had three grandkids and thought that was it

The three are now young adults. Then one of my DILs, who had said she didn't want to have children, changed her mind. And another son, who insisted he was NEVER going to have children, now has one too. So now there a six, with a big age span in between the first three and the last three.

Thank you so much!

I'm always taken aback when I hear about people who really don't care much about being a grandparent. It's just about the best thing ever!

[SidneyR]

15. Outdoor cats

Can you retrain your "come and go as they please" cats to be indoors only? It's much safer for them, as there are limitless hazards out there for cats that venture outside.

[Rorey]

17. I really can't

I agree with you, but these would be an absolute nightmare to have as solely indoor cats.

The reason I have them at all is because a pregnant cat showed up and had three kittens on my back porch. Within a few days she hid them and didn't bring them around until they were a few months old. She still showed up for meals, so I know she was pretty close by. I had to trap the kittens to get them spayed/neutered. We tried to tame them, but I just think it was too late.

So what I've got now is a very tame tortie with an attitude, and her three offspring. They're 3 1/2 years old and can come and go as they please, but over the summer two of them have only come in to eat. Oh, and I also have "Mr. Napper", I guess. For the last week he's been coming in every day to take a long nap. I think he's someone's cat, but apparently my sofa is his morning nap spot.

All four of my cats stay pretty close to home. I have a huge yard, and they also hang out in my neighbor's yard. She enjoys them and says they keep the mouse population down.

Even the mama tortie would go absolutely bonkers to have to stay inside. If I had chosen to get a cat, it'd be an inside cat, but this mama cat chose me, and it is what it is.

[secondwind]

19. I can feel your happiness, being a grandma too!

Enjoy your time with family, it’s the best thing ever!

[Rorey]

21. Yes.

Yes, being a grandma is the best!

[central scrutinizer]

22. They make cat doors that read the chips in their necks

You program it to open only for the cats that are approved. You can set it for in only, out only, or both ways. I didn’t want the neighborhood cats eating my cat’s food or worse, raccoons.

[Rorey]

23. We can't mix our cats together

The thing is, we don't want our cats to be together. My son's cats have always been indoor-only cats, so it would be risky to expose them to my cats. His cats are already going to be a bit traumatized by the change. My son has been transferred several times since they've had their cats, and they've had quite a time with the trips and the change in homes. It would be hell for them to also have to adjust to other cats, and chances are big that mine would not be happy to have strange cats in their immediate presence.

We'll work it out. Mine adjusted fairly easily a few years ago with my other son's monster dog, whom I loved, living in the upstairs and half the yard. I put cat doors in the basement windows at that time. I've since removed them. I have a better plan this time. I never did feel too comfortable with their cat doors in those windows because I always feared a skunk might somehow get in.

Oh, and by the way, I tried that out-only cat door thing. It didn't work to keep out raccoons. I caught one pulling it up from the outside. My system now is to completely shut down the cat door that's in my back door when it gets dark. They've got another one in a garage window that has worked for over a year in being raccoon-proof.