Invite friends over that you've known for nearly 50 years--they'll bring nearly 50 year old memories

[DFW]

On my second free day after about 14 straight that weren't, we invited 4 of our firends down here for a big lunch/dinner. Three were members of an urban commune in Münster that one, a doctor, had helped organize in 1974/75. The doctor, who used to have his practice in nearby Gelsenkirchen, used to donate a couple of weeks of his time to Doctors Without Borders in Africa, and had his own practice for the rest of the year. A few years ago, he was hit by a string of horrible luck, getting immobilized by a stroke, partially recovering only to also be diagnised with Parkinsin's disease, and at the same time saw his son come down with, and die of, a glioblastoma. the same kind of incurable brain cancer that felled both Teddy Kennedy and John McCain.

The other three were the doctor's wife, with whom he has been for maybe 12 years (his new disability has been REALLY hard on her), and two retired teachers, also from the original urban commune. My wife was the baby of the group at "barely" 70. ONe of the teachers brought some photos from the "olympics" of 1978, something the commune and their friends used to organize every summer. My wife was spending that year with me in Massachusetts, but under the prevailing rules, she needed to leave the country every 90 days, if only for a day. We were pplanning to go to Canada, but PanAm offered a short-term $149 stand-by only round trip to Amsterdam, which was cheaper than any round trip flight to Canada. So, we took it, stayed in Europe for a week, and happened to be in Germany for the "olympics."

Someone took photos of the people present, and there was this one of my wife, not entirely happy with the cool and rainy weather, but still (to me, anyway) as captivating as she ever was.


To make sure no one went hungry. my wife made BBQ chicken with roasted veggies and a fresh salad. I made an Indian curry with shrimp and a lot of scallops, Major Grey chutney (of course) on the side. On the side was German baguette bread, goat cheese from Catalunya (I was just down there at the beginning of the week), and fresh cold-pressed apple juice from another friend of a friend. For dessert, there was Hamakua Hawaiian toffee and a few German pastries my wife had baked this morning. Needless to say, we have a lor of leftovers, in case anyone is in the area, but they won't last long.

Every now and then you just gotta shut down and go slow. Today, we did.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. How wonderful that you and your beautiful wife were able to take this day to go slow!

It's really necessary for mental and physical health. Believe me, I know. And you know it even better!

Please tell her hello from me and Lionel! Hugs to you both.

[DFW]

3. Thanks, Peggy!

And message delivered!

[mitch96]

2. I too am fortunate to have friends that I've know for many decades...

My one buddy we met when we were 5 years old. Next is a girlfriend that we met at the age of 15 and another buddy I met when we were 16. We still talk text and chat daily. When we get together we talk about all the stuff we did and one fills in parts of the story that the others forgot. Good times. Too many "hold my beer, watch this" crazy times.! I have one friend that I lament loosing contact with. He went to the dark side (rabid conservative) and we don't talk much. Maybe a birthday or anniversary text.
It sucks as I want my old friend back!!!....... sands politics....
m

[DFW]

4. I don't have any friends from THAT far back

I always wonder what it would be like. The ones I WOULD have kept were taken early. One in a car crash when I was in my teens, and one when I was 38. He was a genius literary mind who was an American classmate of mine while we were teenagers in Spain. He returned to the States, but not for long. He was soon back in Europe (Italy this time), but Spain kept tugging at him, and he was happily living in Madrid, aware of a high cholesterol problem "that he wasn't paying enough attention to," according to his own words. He dropped dead of a heart attack at age 38 in Madrid.

Sixteen years later, I barely managed to escape the same fate, but paid a lot more attention to my choledterol problem, keeping in mind what happened to my friend from "New Hampshah." No Republicans among them, anywhere, fortunately. I'd hate to have friends from THAT far back who turned out to adhere to a philosophy that was so repellant to me. The disappointment would have cut very deeply.

[mitch96]

5. I lost a friend at an early age to suicide. Me and my friend I met at 5 and my other friend were

the 3 musketeers. We were all gear heads messing with motorcycles and European sports cars. Tommy was brilliant and one of those that did not have to study and got all "A's" in school. Sadly he succumbed to mental illness, drugs and alcohol and died in his late 20's.
Very sad. My other friend is of a right leaning mind set. Fortunately we maintain our friendship by not talking about politics. Too much fun with bikes and cars!!
And we are in our 70's!!!
m

[ret5hd]

6. Some of us say "That's EXACTLY why they aren't invited!"

[DFW]

7. I can imagine that sometimes being the case, too

But my wife and the three other original commune members were friends before I even showed up on the scene, and through the metamorphosis from children to parents to grandparents, the bond never loosened. It’s a special group, and, fortunately for me, one that was always welcoming to new partners brought in from outside. After 48 years, I can hardly be considered “new” any more, but they were already friends before my wife and I even met. Bonds like that either dissolve over time or strengthen over time. In this case, they hardened into titanium-reinforced steel.