Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News Editorials & Other Articles General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

mac56

(17,814 posts)
Sat Nov 29, 2025, 12:18 PM Nov 29

Eleven no-contact years after the fact

I just reached out to a woman who dumped me a long time ago.
Probably unwise, but I'll see.

12 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Eleven no-contact years after the fact (Original Post) mac56 Nov 29 OP
All that can happen is she says no. Good luck. 👍 Lochloosa Nov 29 #1
only reason that squares in this corner stopdiggin Nov 29 #2
And that's why True Dough Nov 29 #9
Eytan Mirsky FTW mac56 Nov 29 #3
Wish I had seen this 40 years ago...... lastlib Nov 30 #12
Maintain your boundaries to protect yourself. bucolic_frolic Nov 29 #4
please be careful AllaN01Bear Nov 29 #5
Good luck Easterncedar Nov 29 #6
Two guys from high school reached out on Facebook to apologize womanofthehills Nov 29 #8
Sounds like True Dough Nov 29 #10
It's nice to be a lunatic Ponietz Nov 29 #7
Ooof LudwigPastorius Nov 30 #11

stopdiggin

(14,863 posts)
2. only reason that squares in this corner
Sat Nov 29, 2025, 12:30 PM
Nov 29

Is if you have some stuff on your end that you'd like to make amends for ...
But - looking for 'different' or 'sorry', coming from the other direction ... ? No - don't think so. That's her territory.
I hope it works out for you - but I don't think I'd get my hopes up.

lastlib

(27,327 posts)
12. Wish I had seen this 40 years ago......
Sun Nov 30, 2025, 12:05 PM
Nov 30

We started talking about marriage, and she told me she "wasn't ready to be tied down." (I think the real truth is that her mother persuaded her that I wasn't rich enough, a different story.) We went our separate ways, and eight months later, she invited me to her wedding (to a guy she divorced four years later.)

Long story short, she has inserted herself back into my life since my parents' death, a dozen years or so after her second divorce. I still haven't really come to terms with how to deal with her. I really think there is some mutual love in this, but not sure how strong it is. Complicating it is the fact that we live 900 miles apart.

bucolic_frolic

(53,603 posts)
4. Maintain your boundaries to protect yourself.
Sat Nov 29, 2025, 12:40 PM
Nov 29

Time changes people, but some inner parts remain the same.

Easterncedar

(5,357 posts)
6. Good luck
Sat Nov 29, 2025, 12:59 PM
Nov 29

I wish I could reach out to apologize to the guy I hurt, but I think he’s better off not thinking of me at all. It would only be in hopes of making me feel less grief and regret. So I don’t.

womanofthehills

(10,672 posts)
8. Two guys from high school reached out on Facebook to apologize
Sat Nov 29, 2025, 08:11 PM
Nov 29

For ghosting me. One I think I only went on one date with but they apologized. Last time I saw them I was 19.

One is on his forth wife and has a mistress.

LudwigPastorius

(13,980 posts)
11. Ooof
Sun Nov 30, 2025, 02:40 AM
Nov 30

I think we've all thought about doing something like that, but you're going to really need to finesse it to keep from coming off as an obsessed stalker type.

Good luck.
Latest Discussions»The DU Lounge»Eleven no-contact years a...