My local volunteer fire department has the best Facebook posts in the world this week.

[Staph]

That's the Barboursville Volunteer Fire Department of Barboursville, West Virginia. A sample of their work this week, after the snow and ice event:

🚨 BVFD ICE SITUATION REPORT 🚨
There is NO SNOW — but enough ICE that Mother Nature and Vanilla Ice just eloped and are sipping margaritas on a tropical island while we suffer. 🧊🍹
🛍️ THE MALL IS CLOSED.
Civilization is crumbling.
Retail morale is in shambles.
Teenagers are wandering aimlessly.
🌧️ FREEZING RAIN IS STILL FALLING — the roads are slicker than a gas station hot dog roller. If you drive like Dale Earnhardt today, we WILL roast you.
⛪ WATCH CHURCH FROM HOME.
God sees you.
God understands black ice.
God does not want you hydroplaning into the pearly gates.
⚡ PREP FOR POWER OUTAGES.
Charge your phones.
Fuel the generators.
Mentally prepare to live like it’s 1874.
Yes, this includes lighting candles and screaming into the void.
🐾 PROTECT THE TOE BEANS.
Bring your animals inside.
No frozen paws.
No popsicle puppies.
No icicle whiskers.
🥾 IF YOU’RE CHECKING ON YOUR NEIGHBORS, WEAR YAKTRAX.
We love kindness.
We do NOT love dramatic driveway wipeouts.
Do not become the emergency.
🚒 BVFD volunteers are ready, caffeinated, and fueled by chaos.
Stay home.
Stay warm.
Stay feral.
And for the love of all things Appalachian — USE YOUR BRAIN CELLS.

[Lovie777]

1. Pretty good................

I like

[erronis]

2. Those are great bits of wisdom from Appalachia! Use your brain cells!