1) I never posted in the DU Lounge 2) Did not make any New Years Resolutions (my bad, I guess)

[mrdmk]

Here is some from someone who is more clever than me and knows how to make goals in life!

I’ve never been one for New Years resolutions, but, then, I’ve never been a father before, either. That means up until now, the symptoms of my early onset Old Jewish Man Syndrome — anxiety, neurosis, self-hate and attendant gastrointestinal distress — mostly affected just me, and not a small child. So I figure if there’s a first time for everything, then 2013 is as good a year as any to come up with 10 resolutions that, if fulfilled, hold out the hope of making me a better and healthier dad, husband, writer and overall person.

Some of these will seem trivial, and others will seem more serious. My guess is that at least a few will ring true for you – and if they don’t, well, at least you can have a good laugh at my expense. Here they are in no specific order:

1. I will stop lying to my exercise machine: When it comes to my relationship with workout machines, I am nothing short of a pathological liar. Whether at home or on vacation, I tell the machines I meet that I weigh 173 pounds when I really weigh about 10 pounds more than that. In other words, when I program my workout, I tell the machine I’m the weight I want to be, but not the weight I actually am. Why do I do this and what the hell do I really think I’m getting away with?

Resolved: My exercise deceit must end.

2. Stop using emoticons: It’s completely humiliating to admit that I use emoticons, but, alas, I still do. Typically, I use them in email messages and text to connote tone – as in “Go f— yourself ” to a buddy who got the day off or “I made a wrong turn ” to make a pathetic excuse for being late. Beyond emoticons being just straight-up irritating, they imply both insecurity and poor writing skills. Essentially, they suggest that you are afraid someone will take something the wrong way and/or that you can’t come up with the right words that project precise meaning. The problem, though, is that at this point, using emoticons is just as bad as sending a message that gets taken the wrong way, because more and more people (rightly!) assume you are kinda pathetic for using an emoticon in the first place.

Resolved: I’m either assuming people will get my meaning, or I’ll improve my email and text-message prose.

More at link: http://www.salon.com/2013/01/01/resolved_in_2013_ill_stop_paying_attention_to_rush/?source=newsletter

As stated I did not make any promises to myself that I cannot keep...

[pinboy3niner]

1. :)

Oh, wait... Oops, I did it again... Oh, darn!