Marshall U. dismissed from bottle-rocket-shot-out-of-anus lawsuit

[KamaAina]

The Thundering Herd is trying really, really hard to catch up with its couch-burning rival WVU...

http://wvrecord.com/news/s-4021-cabell-county/260617-marshall-u-dismissed-from-bottle-rocket-shot-out-of-anus-lawsuit

The Marshall University Board of Governors has been dismissed as a defendant in a lawsuit involving a student attempting to shoot bottle rockets out of his anus at a fraternity party.

Louis Helmburg III sued the Alpha Tau Omega Fraternity Inc. of Huntington, W.Va.; Richmond Property Group Ltd.; Travis Hughes, the man who attempted to shoot the bottle rockets; Marshall University Board of Governors; and Marshall University Interfraternal Council after he was injured when he attended a fraternity party on May 1, 2011....

Helmburg, who played for Marshall University’s baseball team at the time but wasn’t on the Thundering Herd’s 2013 roster, claimed Hughes became intoxicated and attempted to “shoot bottle rockets out of his anus on the ATO deck.”

When doing so, Hughes startled Helmburg, who then jumped back and fell off of the deck of the fraternity house and was injured, according to the suit. He was lodged between the deck and an air conditioning unit.

WE ARE MARSHALL!!

[Turbineguy]

1. It's a slippery slope.

One day it's bottle rockets, the next day it's Rush Limbaugh's facts.

[struggle4progress]

2. Somehow that idea never occurred to me back in my college days, but google results suggest

it has been a popular activity in certain circles

Defendant Hughes was highly intoxicated on this date and time, and decided .. it would be a good idea to shoot bottle rockets out of his anus on the ATO deck ... Defendant Hughes placed a bottle rocket in his anus, ignited the fuse, but instead of launching, the bottle rocket blew up in the defendant's rectum, and this startled the plaintiff .. at which time he fell off of the ATO deck ... There was no railing on said deck at the time ... Defendant Hughes .. owed plaintiff ... a duty of care not to drink under age, or to fire bottle rockets out of his anus
http://www.courthousenews.com/2012/02/02/43572.htm

[KamaAina]

3. What an ass.

[struggle4progress]

5. But I can say I have had many many other bad ideas over the years!

And before I was even out of middle school, there were a number of times I had experimentally tried various things that somehow didn't turn out nearly as badly as anybody with half a brain might have been expected to!

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

6. So what happened to the shooter?

The complaint says "the bottle rocket blew up in the defendant's rectum, and this startled the plaintiff." It sure as hell must have startled the defendant, too.

[struggle4progress]

7. I didn't find details about this particular fellow, but the activity seems popular

with the "Watch this! Hold my beer crowd!" and some unpleasant examples are graphically available by websearch

[pinboy3niner]

4. I've heard of projectile vomiting, but this is just asinine

[Enrique]

8. a great day for Marshall U

they will surely put this on the cover of their alumni Magazine.