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Related: Culture Forums, Support ForumsTears of laughter at this website. Thanksgiving side dishes at FOODSPIN.
Miz t. said "What the hell are you laughing at?
"You have to see this."
http://deadspin.com/how-to-make-a-thanksgiving-side-dish-a-guide-for-slack-5961433
Excerpt:
Cranberry Sauce
To begin with, open a can of cranberry sauce.
No, seriously.
Every Thanksgiving, in every family's grand feast, there's somebody who puts together some earnest, gorgeous relish made from fresh cranberries and hand-squeezed cranberry juice and orange zest and lemon juice and friggin' organic raw sugar he carried on his back in a sealed plastic bag as he swam back from his illegal trip to Cuba where he harvested it himself with the campesinos, oh the hale and humble campesinos and their merry field songs, and that's wonderful and alland then you eat it and it's tasty and tart and bright, but it's not right, because it's not the can-shaped log of cranberry-flavored jelly and what you really want is the can-shaped log of cranberry-flavored jelly because the can-shaped log of cranberry-flavored jelly tastes like Thanksgiving, which is what you want Thanksgiving to taste like.
Open a can of cranberry sauce. Upend the can over a plate. After the log slides out and plops onto the plate, tip it onto its side and slice it into discs about as thick as your middle finger, which you will extend in hearty holiday greeting to anybody who gives you any side-eye about bringing a can-shaped log of cranberry-flavored jelly to Thanksgiving.
Turbineguy
(37,365 posts)It always seemed that the Cook went to extra trouble to present the cranberry jelly naked, but still in the shape of the can.
bluesbassman
(19,379 posts)So I constructed a rudimentary lathe that I can turn the cranberry log on and produce those nice equatorial grooves. Makes slicing into discs a lot easier too once you're half lit from trying to drown out Uncle George and Aunt Sally fighting in the family room over who had it rougher as kids.
Turbineguy
(37,365 posts)LiberalEsto
(22,845 posts)but no such luck. Gotta cook the whole damned meal for the 3 of us, and my husband and I are vegetarians. Live at home daughter wants turkey.
elleng
(131,107 posts)Daughter has suggested I go to NJ to do thanksgiving w her, pregnant, due Dec. 20, in their new home, closing Nov 15, and in-laws are 'fussy eaters,' so we can't experiment or do short cuts, apparently. MAY induce premature labor, ya think???
LiberalEsto
(22,845 posts)or at least bring half the food. Then, you bring the cranberry sauce.
elleng
(131,107 posts)will ask daughter about options, just married 2 years, and tho very nice, I don't know them that well. MAY have a chance to feel my way, as will see mother-in-law at baby shower next Saturday.
I think daughter wants to play with her new kitchen, and kind of commemorate her recently deceased father (my 'not-ex,') who hogged the kitchen at Thanksgiving-time; lots of 'our/his' recipes in mind.
elleng
(131,107 posts)Arkansas Granny
(31,528 posts)dixiegrrrrl
(60,010 posts)but mealtime ought to be a hoot with them around.