Be honest. What are your DU peccadilloes? I was traumatized years ago. I was

[applegrove]

repeatedly separated from people in my life over years. Now I compulsively count up replies and recs to the articles I post in an attempt to feel safe. That I'm not being isolated. That I don't have to cut my loses. That I am connected to the world. Once I get to about 20 I feel safe and can relax. Even when my social life outside is going well...I still need to count. When I joined the DU, 10 years ago exactly, I immediately found the place for me to share my political interest. I'm in the zone when I am here. I love helping in small ways. I should have pursued politics earlier in my life but was pushed of that track for a bit. Sometime in those ten years it became a needed touchstone in and of itself, no longer to simply push for a liberal world. I multipurpose when I'm here.

[Lochloosa]

1. Kick for comfort.

[applegrove]

26. Very sweet.

[Downwinder]

2. Add one more for your count.

[applegrove]

27. Thank you.

[LiberalAndProud]

3. 3 - Because ... applegrove

[applegrove]

28. You are kind.

[cwydro]

4. I'm kind of the opposite.

Took me years to even notice the "my posts" tab lol!

Even now, I rarely click it. I try to stay current in threads I post in so I can reply to whom I want to reply.

But here's a reply for ya!

[applegrove]

29. I was all about the topic when I started

too. But then G. w. Bush had been elected again and it was very scary in the US.

[betsuni]

5. I'm afraid to do OPs.

I get in a mood and like you, need to feel connected, but then if I get more than a few replies I start to panic and run away. I don't even check to see if there are any more replies and then feel guilty, also neurotic. I need Internet therapy.

[applegrove]

31. Ah don‘t feel guilty about not replying.

I don‘t because I am a big picture person, not a details oriented one. Do what you love to do on the DU and don‘t sweat that you may roll differently than others.

[steve2470]

6. kick! nt

[applegrove]

32. Thanks.

[bravenak]

7. I answer anything.

Compulsively. Cannot not do it unless I log out.

[applegrove]

34. We‘d be nowhere without ya!

[cwydro]

65. !!!

[bravenak]

67. I try so hard!

[cwydro]

68. I truly laughed out loud.

[Ramses]

8. I recommended this

Its good to be connected if that is what is important to you. For me, I prefer solitude, but I wanted to show I understand where you are coming from. Everyone is different. Im a live and let live type of person

[applegrove]

35. Live and let live. It is the only way to fly.

[Tobin S.]

9. I post here because it's interesting.

I'm sitting here at home alone and drinking beer. It's a way to socialize even if it isn't real. It's sort of idealized socializing. This place takes the fear and apprehension out of getting to know people. You can have many good experiences here and pleasant exchanges. But when you get down to it, it isn't real. I think a lot of people here live out their fantasies in their posts.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

11. But it is real, in a way,

at least in the sense that the people who post here are real people. For that reason I try not to be too much of an a-hole, even if I disagree with a post or think it's kinda dumb, because there's a real person out there and I don't want to hurt anyone. Sometimes it's hard to disagree without being disagreeable - even if it's not intentional - because you lose a lot of nuance on a message board. Maybe there are some fantasies going on, but we're all real.

[Tobin S.]

14. Yes, we are all real

And I understand that there is a lot of emotion behind some of these posts. But go through these forums and you will find people saying things to other people that they would never say to them in person- mean things and kind things. That's what I mean by it not being real. For example, I do not go into work and start telling my Stories from the Road. I've never told one of those stories to another trucker. But I've posted about 100 of them here. Those stories don't exist outside of my hard drive and DU.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that this place shouldn't be seen as a good alternative to social interaction.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

15. Absolutely, it's not a substitute for communicating IRL.

And one reason for that is that we often don't behave online the way we do face to face. The anonymity of the internet makes it possible for people to feel like they can get away with being rude and nasty in a way that might get them punched in the nose if they said those things "live." Sometimes people feel very hurt when some stranger on the internet says something mean. If someone starts being a jerk I just quit reading the thread and don't take it seriously, but others may take it harder. In that sense, yes, it's not quite "real."

[applegrove]

37. Oh I do try and spread my wings

every so often. I am around a phenominal group of people when I work. I socialize when I can But for now it is baby steps.

[applegrove]

36. You are correct it is real. Issues discussed

make it real for so many when it gets implemented as policy. Nothing realer than what type of country you end up living in.

[Downwinder]

23. DU is my MS therapy. It has been a very good one.

I just need for Skinner to figure out how to bill Medicare.

[applegrove]

38. DU, turning downtime into action.

[Marie Marie]

10. #10 here Applegrove.

May I join you in the zone?

[840high]

13. #11

[applegrove]

49. Thanks.

[applegrove]

39. Zone away.

[Kaleva]

12. Kicked!

[applegrove]

40. I get a kick out of you too!

[Kali]

16. ...

[applegrove]

41. Right back at ya Kali.

[xocet]

17. It is cool to have a community. K & R n/t

[applegrove]

42. And what a community DU is.

[Lifelong Protester]

18. There, you are at 21

*exhale*

[applegrove]

43. ahhhhhhhhhhhh!

[UTUSN]

19. I've enjoyed your posts. n/t

[applegrove]

45. I enjoy yours too.

[jaysunb]

20. I depend on you...

when I see your handle, I click, because, I know your post will be worthwhile.

How's that,

[applegrove]

47. That is really sweet.

[orleans]

21. it's okay--you can stop now. all the counting, the posts & the recs

it's all okay. we're here. we love you. regardless of how many replies or recs you get--you're still safe here. so am i.

ten years? me too. happy anniversary.

(on edit: me at ten years "lately" but not today. you're at ten years tomorrow!)

[applegrove]

50. Congrats on ten big years!!!

[madfloridian]

22. ....

[Android3.14]

24. "Once I get to about 20 I feel safe and can relax."

That's a flag.

[applegrove]

52. I know it is. I have ptsd. My day is filled

with all sorts of bumps that way. But after 20 I am really relaxed. The whole time I am in the zone. I‘m very lucky to have landed at the DU.

[Spitfire of ATJ]

25. The world and the country is already Liberal....

Last edited Sat Feb 7, 2015, 02:55 PM - Edit history (1)

That's being kept a secret by the media.

[applegrove]

53. Seems even the GOP is using liberal words

Last edited Sat Feb 7, 2015, 10:03 PM - Edit history (1)

these days. Maybe the msm will catch on.

[Spitfire of ATJ]

63. CNBC wont....

They're convinced morality is a commie plot.

[Shrike47]

30. My DU picadillos? Sometimes I say things I think are funny. They aren't always.

And I get ferociously angry sometimes. These things happen.

We love you.

[pinboy3niner]

33. Peccadilloes?

Haven't tried 'em. Do you have the Road Kill Helper recipe for 'em?

[betsuni]

46. I use peccadilloes in empanada filling.

A pain to shell them, though.

[bhikkhu]

44. "I don't have to prove my absurd contention - you have to prove I'm not right"

- most common where the absurd contention is not based on any given facts. Then "I'm not going to tell you where I got my contention from - do your own research!"

Other than that, quick responses to OP titles where the OP itself was clearly not read. Some things are click-bait titled for gut response, and then often the content tells a whole other story.

Another pecadillo - the use of the word "disgusting". I suppose its a matter of personal style, but that's an emotional response rather than a rational response, and emotions are more often manipulated than not. I look at it as an indication of a mindset easily or willingly manipulated.

I can't say I pay much attention to recs or post counts, though a conversation with an "I don't have to prove my absurd contention!" type with a very low post count is often not worth the time.

[herding cats]

48. My childhood was a nightmare

I've since screwed up my adult life quite well, thank you very much. I'm working on repairing that damage currently.

This is just the internet, and it's not nearly as polite as it was 10 years ago. Even then it wasn't a bastion of kind and loving people we like to imagine it was. Anonymity breeds jerks, just remember that for me, ok? It's not you, I promise you this, it's them.

I read your posts when I see them and 9 times out of 10 you get a rec from me! I work long hours anymore and wish I could comment more. If I could, your posts would see more of my moniker, that's a fact, Jack! As it is, I think you're snuggled in bed before I even get to relax and post much most days. Which doesn't mean I don't appreciate you.

[applegrove]

54. You are very kind.

[rug]

51. Happy anniversary!

[applegrove]

55. I was so angry at the way gop supporters

were baiting kerry supporters after kerry lost that I decided to go to american websites and found DU a few months later.

[rug]

56. I heard Hannity complaing about DU dring the 04 election so I figured it had to be good.

[applegrove]

58. You don‘t hear the right mentioning

the DU nearly as much these days.

[cwydro]

66. And I heard about DU on Limbaugh!

This is hilarious!

[applegrove]

57. I agree. If you are going to contend something

then you should be able to lay out your reasons why. Though I do try to remember that not everyone has the context dependant long term memory I do.

[In_The_Wind]

59. I seem to find odd images when I search for words in the OPs.

I still drag 'em back to share with DU.
Sometimes it's funny and sometimes it's not.

[Aristus]

60. My DU pecadillo: I come here in good times and bad for non-judgmental company.

When I'm away from family, lonely and out of sorts, I tend to get plowed and post in the Lounge.

No matter how needy and incoherent I get, my DU and Lounge friends are always there with warm words of friendship and empathy.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

61. posted way too many sexy pics. lived to regret it.

much like most women & for the exact same reason (misogyny. both from men and women)

[steve2470]

62. Peccadilloes, hmm, I always associate that word with sex lol

Moving on, I like to post articles that are interesting to people. I feel like I'm helping people in a small way. I'm just a helpful sort of guy, whether it's small (DU posts) or a tad bigger (helping my son).

I'd like to think that DU is a virtual springboard to real life action, and in some cases, it is. It's definitely a virtual community of people who care and who want to be educated and informed. I wish GD was a lot more civil than it is, but hope springs eternal.

Glad you're here and happy DU 10th!

[NJCher]

72. consider this

I'd like to think that DU is a virtual springboard to real life action, and in some cases, it is.

I think it is! I'm a teacher and I often take items posted at DU and use them in my classes. Think about the impact of that: one teacher-->20 students per class-->4 classes-->80 students now in the know.

Then maybe 30 per cent of them talk about it to their friends and family-->who knows how many people that reached!


Cher

[steve2470]

75. that's awesome! nt

[gwheezie]

64. I came here from aol chat

Initially because rather than the quick back and forth of chat I found this site expanded my interests.
Since my husband died I have been fighting becoming a recluse. Until the other day I was only leaving the house to go to work. The only conversations I was having with people in real life have been about my late husband, having to sell 2 of my horses and putting the last one down. Then I'm being sued. Coming here has helped me at least passively connect to something other than myself. It has actually helped keep me from wallowing. There were days when I could not muster the energy to talk but I could check du 10 times a day. So when I can't talk anymore I can come here.

[DeadLetterOffice]

78. I'm glad you come here. I'm glad here is here to come to.

[R B Garr]

69. Well, right now it's getting suckerpunched by a creepy football fan

who trolled the Lounge. I posted the backstory of how disgusted I was with this behavior because I'm not about to be someone's victim and put up with a bad actor trolling me for his own shits and giggles. Last week, after realizing this creep was apparently emotionally crippled because his team choked in the '08 Super Bowl, then choked again in the '12 Super Bowl, and just because they managed to not choke again and were gifted a game, he used the opportunity to suckerpunch the names he collected on his troll thread and start trolling about "dominant" performance. LMAO. You can say whatever you want to about me for posting that, but it looks like the Lounge is not drama free after all, but I'm not about to take that shit without pointing it out. FUCK THAT.

Then, lets see. I obviously ran into someone from the now-apparent Lounge clique who hasn't given a crap about anything else I've posted here, but just wanted to question me as if he was put upon by something I posted, yet he didn't question the other drama threads that led to my posting. FUCK THAT.

Then going way back, watching the feminists get trolled with the pithy, anti-intellectual comments about jealousy and freedom of speech. The problem with those trolls is that feminists are a part of the Democratic party. Then there's watching the Black Americans get trolled in the same manner.

MAIN THING: There are so many backstories and vendettas to almost everything posted that there is little pure discussion. I guess I've started noticing it more since that META group was closed down. I tried to look at that Meta a few times, but it was a horror. Now it's spilled out into other forums, so it's really hard to ignore it. I can't believe there was a time I took some of those posters seriously and regret the time wasted trying to figure out where they were coming from when it's just perpetual vendettas.

Applegrove, you are a great poster and are very much appreciated. I always check your threads and thanks for posting!

[MrScorpio]

70. This is a safe place for you nt

[lovemydog]

71. I wish I could reply to every awesome post.

I picture a real person posting. The post made me laugh or think or empathize or see a great photo or hear great music. I want to hug the poster and say 'Hey, I get a kick out of you!'

[pinboy3niner]

73. War trauma

After serving in combat in Vietnam, I psychologcally suppressed my memories for 16 years.

After I opened up, having a routine personal exchange with the cashier at the 7-11 felt like a warm and meaningful human experience.

Walking down the street suddenly felt joyful, compared to feeling always insecure and at risk of unknown threats.

It was a relativelely brief feeling, because the trauma comes back and must be re-processed from time to time.

But seeing one of the hardest core VN vets I know talk of actually hugging somebody when he opened up was a BFD.

[steve2470]

74. I'm glad you are better now, pinboy

You are, far and away, one of the nicest members on this site, and I'm confident you're the same in real life. Also very punny

compared to feeling always insecure and at risk of unknown threats.

I can relate to that myself, but I'm not a vet as you know. Happy 2015, pinboy!

[Godhumor]

76. I compulsively unhide every hidden post I come across

Because I want to see why it got hidden.

[DeadLetterOffice]

79. Oh good, it's not just me that does that!

[betsuni]

81. So do I.

Also if there's a self-deleted post with comments I have to look at the comments and try to figure out what the post was. A fully-clothed post is more intriguing than a full-frontal one. A hidden post is a strip tease and I must press "show."

[lovemydog]

82. Oh hell yeah.

I love doing that too.

[steve2470]

84. Same here nt

[Capt. Obvious]

87. Same

[Manifestor_of_Light]

77. Sometimes I get chased off for a few days.

Then I come back again.
I have very few friends IRL. This turned into too many unhealthy hours on the internet.
I tend to not comment on politics which is strange since I grew up being very active in the local Democratic Party organization along with my parents. Other people usually say the same thing I would say, so I comment on other things.

[lovemydog]

83. I wish I had a bunch of hearts to give out

because I'd give you one Manifestor_of_Light. I love your music-related posts.

Ooh, here's something for ya! I'm sure you've seen it before but it's always worth watching again.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

86. Thank you so much!

Music is one of the subjects I'm cracked on, love to babble about or whatever you want to call it. The other one is law. I started piano lessons at age five so music is my second language. I started reading at three. Mom said it was signs at three and books at four. And I was still taking a bottle to bed at four! My husband is terribly impressed by that. He said "You were probably reading Dostoyevsky and drinking from your baby bottle at the same time!"

I took 12 years of piano and 8 years of violin and 2 years of voice lessons. Sang in church choirs, directed church choirs, played the piano for church (usually Unitarian because you have freedom in what you can select--you don't need to play "sacred" music. I say, if it's good music it's sacred music.)

My old piano and violin teacher has gone to the dark side--he plays accordion now!!!

Yes, I've seen that before, but since Queen is one of my two favorite bands(as if you couldn't tell by my favorite astrophysicist avatar), I always love it and also love Annie and David. My other favorite band is The Police. "Under Pressure" is on Greatest Hits II by Queen.

I highly recommend Annie's new CD, "Nostalgia" which is a bunch of old lounge and pop standards with jazz arrangements. She's always had lots of soul and I love that. She lowered "Summertime" by a minor sixth to accommodate her voice lowering with age which happens to all of us. So I think I'll do that too!!

[DeadLetterOffice]

80. I start to post something...

... and then I delete it because I'm afraid I'm going to get yelled at by people I've never even met.

Except then, every once in a while, I give in to my inner idiot and get in a fight with someone here over something truly stupid. That whole "someone on the internet is WRONG!" syndrome, lol.

[No Vested Interest]

85. I stay up way too late at night filling in time

on DU.
Like now.
I go through the latest news, the latest in the states, and the several groups I'm interested in.
If I'm still not ready to call it a night, I start on the Lounge or several groups of secondary interest.
(There really is something here for everybody and every taste.)

I wasn't always a night-owl.
I had a schedule and kept to it quite well.
Now there's no reason or need to answer to anyone re my computer habits or my sleeping habits.

[Capt. Obvious]

88. I adblock certain emoticons

Occasionally a thread looks weird to me because there are a ton of replies but no text.