And another thing...

[Orrex]

Every Monday morning, before my ass even hits the chair, my coworker asks "So how was your weekend?"

Like a human being, I give a five-syllable response: "Fine thanks. How was yours?"

This yields a two-hour in-depth recounting of every damn thing thing that she did since I last saw her on Friday. Most of the time it's about what she did with her puppeh, about which I literally could not possibly care less. And I mean literally.


Monday morning small-talk should be outlawed.

[Phentex]

1. I take it you aren't a people person...

[Orrex]

5. Hey, if it's something worth saying, then I'm happy to hear it,

but yet another recounting of how she once again organized her silverware drawer is a bit much for me.

Similarly, I'm not so self-involved that I imagine my every activity to be fascinating for my coworkers; therefore I spare them a point-by-point retelling of my weekend's itinerary. At most, I touch on the highlights, and I certainly don't punish them with lengthy stories about what my dog did with its feet.

[True Dough]

2. And then there's those people

who post their rants on the DU, thinking we really care to hear all about the little interactions in life that get under their skin...

[CurtEastPoint]

3. snort.... ^^^

[Orrex]

6. See, but you had the luxury of choice

Nobody forced you to click on this thread, whereas I am required to sit in proximity to my incessantly chatty coworker.

[True Dough]

8. Well, how about you have a very important project to work on

every Monday morning?

"Sorry, no time to talk. The boss says I gotta have this done by the end of the day."

[Orrex]

10. I should start carrying a clipboard

That way I can make it look like I'm working on something URGENT.

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

14. Great idea! A clipboard can hide that bagel with cream cheese ...

... which is, of course, the only true goal of any Monday morning.

[Kennah]

12. I see what you did there (n/t)

[rug]

4. The best antidote for small talk is naked truth talk.

"I had diarrhea like bubbling mud flats most of Saturday."

[Orrex]

7. LOL. I might give that a try.

[pinboy3niner]

9. Well, you asked

You should've stopped at two syllables.

[Skittles]

11. reply IT SUCKED, AND NO, I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT YOURS

[ohnoyoudidnt]

15. lol

Unfortunately, the person I would like to say that to writes my evaluations and has influence over promotions.

[Kennah]

13. I totally hear ya

I'm an extrovert in a cube-quad of introverts. My Supervisor is in the next cube-duo, and also an introvert. Two more guys on the team are relocating so that all 7 of us will be together. 1 extrovert and 6 introverts.

Rarely do any of them talk about their weekend, and unless I think it's interesting and will interest them, I don't share.

Of the 3 in my cube-quad, and I've been there for 16 months, I don't know if any of them is married, single, divorced, widowed, straight, gay, Christian, Buddhist, Atheist, or convicted murderer--although they probably wouldn't share that last thing. Don't know what kind of car they drive, house or apartment, planning to stay in the job for 20 more years or ready to leave next week.

Was in an all day Emotional Intelligence class with one of them, so I know a few more things about him, but he's still very guarded.

I just don't see any need to pry into people's lives or foist my life--good, bad, or otherwise--onto them.

Having a bit of warp in me, now I'm wondering about things I might try in your situation.

"Terrible weekend. This damned dog tried to bite me. I kicked it to avoid getting bit. Mean, nasty thing. Police took a report, but they aren't hopeful about finding it or the owner."