Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

TexasTowelie

(112,252 posts)
Mon Feb 10, 2020, 11:44 PM Feb 2020

Florida man threatens to destroy everyone with army of turtles, police say

BREVARD COUNTY, Fla. – A man yelling obscenities, calling himself a saint and threatening to send his turtle army to destroy everyone has been arrested, according to an affidavit from the Indialantic Police Department.

Officers responded to at least seven calls about disturbances at Starbucks Coffee, Surfanista Café and Sassy Granny’s Smoothies along N. Miramar Avenue.

Thomas Devaney Lane, 61, went with an officer to the police department, where he yelled at the dispatcher in the lobby while pounding on the walls and glass, police said.

Lane then left the department but was later located at a 7-Eleven on Fifth Avenue.

As an officer stood by, Lane called 911 and told the operator, “I need to leave now or you will all be sorry you (expletive) with the saint,” according to the affidavit.

Read more: https://www.clickorlando.com/news/2019/04/12/florida-man-threatens-to-destroy-everyone-with-army-of-turtles-police-say/

15 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Florida man threatens to destroy everyone with army of turtles, police say (Original Post) TexasTowelie Feb 2020 OP
A turtle army. Just another thing to worry about, I guess. The Velveteen Ocelot Feb 2020 #1
I could use a turtle saint. Not sure what for though. I hope if this is a real turtle army, he is emmaverybo Feb 2020 #2
Is it the water ? magicarpet Feb 2020 #3
My reaction exactly! Karadeniz Feb 2020 #10
I wonder if his turtles are related to Moscow Mitch? 😃 lkinwi Feb 2020 #4
He's a "snake head turtle" Mopar151 Feb 2020 #5
I thought he was 2naSalit Feb 2020 #12
I'd think the Sassy Granny's Smoothie would counter the caffeine underpants Feb 2020 #6
How do we know that? Harker Feb 2020 #11
Yes underpants Feb 2020 #14
.... Tree-Hugger Feb 2020 #7
You can out run them, safeinOhio Feb 2020 #13
They are gradually advancing on us sir! ret5hd Feb 2020 #8
Of course! Newest Reality Feb 2020 #9
If one turtle can break democracy, think of the damage an army could wreak ! nt eppur_se_muova Feb 2020 #15

emmaverybo

(8,144 posts)
2. I could use a turtle saint. Not sure what for though. I hope if this is a real turtle army, he is
Mon Feb 10, 2020, 11:53 PM
Feb 2020

seeing they get supplies, rest, recreation.

underpants

(182,839 posts)
6. I'd think the Sassy Granny's Smoothie would counter the caffeine
Tue Feb 11, 2020, 12:26 AM
Feb 2020

but, hey, what do I know? I’m not the leader of a turtle Army.

Newest Reality

(12,712 posts)
9. Of course!
Tue Feb 11, 2020, 12:35 AM
Feb 2020

The World rests on a turtle that rests on a turtle, etc., all the way down.

This is a sign of the end. When the turtles go, so do we. Egads!

Latest Discussions»Culture Forums»Weird News»Florida man threatens to ...