The Weird News Drinking Game
This isn't a story but I would like to propose the Weird News Drinking Game.
Take 1 drink if the story involves a stupid criminal.
Take 2 drinks if the story involves an animal (can be either wild or domesticated).
Take 3 drinks if the story involves poop or other bathroom / bodily functions.
Take 4 drinks if the story involves a dead person.
Take 5 drinks if the story takes place in Florida.
Finish your drink if the person in the story got arrested for any reason.
Chug a beer if the story involves alcohol at all.
Do a shot of Jager if the story involves food.
Chug two beers if the story involves alcohol and the person in question failed in an extravagant way that does not involve death.
Take a shot if the story involves the bedroom and two shots if the story involves the bedroom and, as Frank Zappa so eloquently put it "extraterrestrial gratification".
Take another drink if the story involves exotic items that you could never possibly afford (eg Kanye West's dictator vehicle that has whale penis leather).
Do another shot if the story involves somebody setting an unusual world record.
Feel free to add more.
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