It's going to be a long night

[Lifeafter70]

Last edited Wed Nov 5, 2025, 07:13 PM - Edit history (1)

Tomorrow we have an appointment with hospice for my son. He is out of options for his ACC cancer and can no longer control his pain with pain management. This is going to be a very long night.
He has a fear of hospital and will not go.
We spent Sunday night in the emergency room due to a fall from fainting.
Please send good vibes our way.

Edit to add: hospice nurse has been here and started him on different pain meds set him up with a social worker, cna, chaplain and other services. She will be back tomorrow to check on him. She also got him a wheelchair so he can get out more (he has had a few falls lately). He feels someone is actually listening to him in regards to pain and anxiety.
Once again DU has got us through difficult times. Thank You Thank You Patricia

[godsentme]

1. 🙌☮️🫶

Sending good vibes. Wishing your son to get relief from pain and fear of hospitals. Wishing you peace and comfort.

[Lifeafter70]

18. Thank you

His fear of hospitals is because of two really extensive surgeries that left him pretty scarred due to tumor growth on catoid artery. The Second surgery was 16 hours long.

Hospice has been here and they are wonderful.

[question everything]

2. Wishing both of you strength and peace and calm

What a harrowing path you are going

[Lifeafter70]

4. Thank you he is in so much pain but refuses to go to the hospital

Acc cancer travels along nerve endings so the pain is unbearable

[waterwatcher123]

3. Wishing you strength and peace at this difficult time.

[democrank]

5. Sending strength to you and your family

I hope Hospice can help your son.

[qanda]

6. I'm so sorry

May his journey be graced with peace and comfort. I cannot imagine what you are feeling. Sending you love.

[BlueWaveNeverEnd]

7. ..

[angrychair]

8. Wish you the very best

And the best for your son as well.

[Rhiannon12866]

9. My uncle had hospice and they were truly wonderful

Wishing you all strength and relief of pain for your son. And, of course, sending all those powerful DU vibes that we can muster...

[Lifeafter70]

20. They were here today

Yes they are truly wonderful.

[murielm99]

10. I am so sorry.

I send you my best and wishes for peace.

[alwaysinasnit]

11. My heart goes out to you, your son, and all your loved ones.

[Randomthought]

12. All my good energy to you and your family

I can't even imagine what you are going through. All my best wishes to you.

[sdfernando]

13. Love and strength to all of you

I am in tears for you. Hug your son and be close. Let him know you love him.

hug:

[irisblue]

14. Best hopes and wishes, I am so sorry

[Irish_Dem]

15. Hospice nurses are the best.

They will take good care of your son.
And hospice does not let their patients suffer.
They will get control of his pain.

[Lifeafter70]

16. That is my hope

[Lifeafter70]

17. See edit and thank you Irish Dem

[Irish_Dem]

19. Yes I used to do some work with Hospice.

The hospice nurses are the best.
They are totally focused on patient comfort, well being, quality of life.

The Hospice nurses come in, take charge and get it all sorted out.
Just like yours did.

Your loved one and family are in good hands.

I am happy to hear it worked out so well.

[Irish_Dem]

21. Are the meds kicking in yet?

Is he getting pain relief?

Let the nurse know if your son is still in severe pain.

[Lifeafter70]

22. Yes he is finally sleeping

He is so relieved. Someone is actually listening to him. Pain docs are good but when it comes to cancer pain there are a lot of laws that limit what they can prescribe and how much. He has been on oxy for 10 years due to three recurrence of tumor growth. His pain doc thought he needed to lower his does during his last remission. When he had his third recurrence he wouldn't increase it cause he thought he was doing ok. ACC cells are microscopic and slow growing so it can take months before recurrence shows up on scan not the case for increased pain.
His hospice nurse explained that long time use like he had leads to tolerance and
uncontrolled pain. This leads to self
medicating in many paitents.
He is so relieved that someone takes his pain seriously and not treat him like he is just seeking drugs.

[Irish_Dem]

23. Fabulous, he is sleeping.

Thank God.
Sleep is so important.
And being pain free.
This is one of the hallmarks of the hospice nurse.
They will not let patients suffer.

And they are holistic, assembling a specialized team to take care of the patient

Yes regular docs just don't want to give the right meds or dosages that hospice patients need.
Yes long term use decreases effectiveness and more meds are needed to do the job.

When a patient is terminal we should not worry about drug addiction issues or drug seeking.
It no longer matters. It is critical to get the patient the pain relief he needs.
This is the difference between a regular doc and the hospice docs and nurses.

It is great that your son is doing well enough to get a wheel chair so he can get around
in a safe way. And that he has crew of people coming to give him specialized services.

So he is doing well and will do better when the team is in place helping him.
Everyone is great, the health aides, the chaplain, social worker, etc.

This is all good news.

[hamsterjill]

24. Nothing really to add, except that I'll be praying for your son (and you).

Prayer is my practice. I'm so sorry that this is happening.

Sending you love and a great big hug!

[onethatcares]

25. from my heart to

the angels ears I wish you the best outcome.

[Laurelin]

26. I'm sending you every positive thought i know

I hope for strength for you and you and your son.

[OLDMDDEM]

27. Know that we are here to support you.

[niyad]

28. Holding you and your family in love and light.

[MLAA]

29. Dear, dear Lifeafter70,

I don’t have any words that are adequate to express how sorry I am. Life can be so unfair and painful. I understand profound pain and despair as my husband passed very recently. I don’t have children but I’m told the love for a child is like no other love, so I can’t truly understand what you and your son are going through. But I can send you loving, comforting energy. 💕

[Lifeafter70]

30. So sorry fir your loss

Since I posted this my son has entered home hospice. His nurse is fantastic. We have good days and bad days but greatful for whatever rune we have together.

[JustinBulletin]

31. There are no adequate words.

I cannot imagine your pain and anguish at this moment, but know that I am sending as many thoughts as I can of peace and comfort during this unbelievably difficult time for your family. Take care of yourselves.

[Sparkly]

32. Sending all my best to you

and to your dear son.

I know it is hard to make sense of these things. Surely, the love, peace, and delivery from pain you are giving your son mean a lot to him.

My thoughts are with you!!!