7 Weird Realities Of Growing Up Without A Religion

[muriel_volestrangler]

Growing up in Sweden is awesome in a lot of ways, but something we don’t have much of is religion. Most of us grow up surrounded by atheism, and a lot of the times we’re not even introduced to the concept of God until we learn about it in school.
...
3. You start questioning people’s sanity

At first, I kind of just shrugged religion off as some sort of ridiculous stories, meant to entertain the generations that didn’t have video games or the internet. So imagine my surprise when this kid in school told me he actually believed in God, and prayed to him every day. At first, I thought he was joking, and when I realized that he wasn’t, I reacted in about the same way as I would if someone told me he actually believed in Super man.

Needless to say, I got sent to the principal’s office.

4. You can’t tell if religion is real or not

After getting in trouble for making fun of that kid’s religion, I was more confused than ever – if religion wasn’t real, then why was it such a big deal to make fun of it? So I asked my teacher about it, and she gave some halfhearted explanation about how it was sort of real, but still wasn’t.

So on one hand, religion was a real thing, and on the other hand it was just make-believe. For a kid who was still struggling with basic math, this wasn’t exactly the easiest concept to grasp.

http://thoughtcatalog.com/mathias-ostlund/2015/05/7-weird-realities-of-growing-up-without-a-religion/

[cantbeserious]

1. Humans Distract And Deceive Themselves Routinely - For Some A Fairy Tale Is Easier Than Reality

eom

[on point]

2. Religion is still so powerful, we are unwilling to admit belief in it is crazy

Your first reaction was right. Belief is crazy. But we give deference because
a) religion is still a powerful institution and in some places they still kill non believers
b) there is lots of horrible history pre-enlightenment of christian faiths persecuting each other over it. The compromise was live and let live.
c) people have a right to believe in superman, even if it is crazy, as long as they don't push it on others, or hurt others.

But yeah, the truth of children. It is crazy, and I'm sure once the deference to religion wears off in another century or so, will be properly classified in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) as an some kind of self delusional illness.

[Major Nikon]

12. Imagine this...

If your neighbor told you they think your satellite dish was absorbing alien mind control beams and reflecting them throughout the neighborhood, you'd probably think they were completely insane and be at least a little unsettled by it.

However, if your neighbor told you they think your other gay neighbors were being influenced by demons and are destroying the fabric of society, we must simply accept their lunacy or be accused of being intolerant.

Funny how that works.

[Thirties Child]

3. Our four children grew up without religion

They're now in their 50s, and each chose a different path:

Son - athiest
Daughter - born-again Catholic
Daughter - spiritual but not religious
Son - says he's born again but it looks like lip-service

[PassingFair]

6. Did most of them join because of their spouses/significant others? nt

[Thirties Child]

10. Athiest, Catholic, Spiritual made the choice themselves.

Catholic married an Athiest. Born Again married then divorced a Born Again. I think he tried Christianity but it really didn't take, never goes to church, never talks about it. Before the marriage I would have called him my Disinterested child, still think of him that way.

For a brief period I took them to UU Sunday School. After my Athiest flirtation, when they were very young, I gravitated to Spiritual-but-not-Religious. They heard a lot about reincarnation, but that only took with one.

[muriel_volestrangler]

8. Why would someone pay lip-service to being born again?

Sounds like a terrible situation, if there's spousal or societal pressure to pretend to be born again. Anything he can to do change it?

[Thirties Child]

11. He married and then divorced a Born Again.

As I said in the previous post, I've always thought I should call him my Disinterested.

[DetlefK]

4. You have to get them while they are young.

Just imagine how hard it would be if you handled religion as an "adult thing". Kids don't get to participate. This is super-important, super-serious adult stuff.
This is about a communion with the creator of the universe! You can't just let a kid pray, who knows what it would ask for?
Once you are old enough, then you are finally allowed to learn about Abraham almost killing Isaac or the israeli tribes enslaving and raping the girls of defeated tribes or giving birth without having sex or walking on water or coming back from the dead.

[rug]

5. I wonder if they're mimicking their parents.

[gcomeau]

7. Number 3 pretty well describes...

...how I go through almost every day of my life feeling every time I look around at society.


"You people seriously believe this stuff? I mean, seriously? This isn't all some kind of Truman-Show-esque practical joke? Because I'd almost find that more believable..."

[rug]

9. I would have thought it was number 1.

[beam me up scottie]

13. I was raised without religion and spent a lot of my childhood going wtf?

As an adult it's only gotten worse.

[Warren Stupidity]

14. my experience too

From about the age of 4 on I was confronted with one wtf moment after another. I remain incredulous that anyone honestly believes the nonsense they profess to believe in.

[beam me up scottie]

15. I bounced back and forth between thinking "you really believe this stuff?"

and feeling like maybe there was something wrong with my family and I because we didn't.

I also felt like people who expected me to believe it were insulting my intelligence.

Still do.

[AuntPatsy]

26. I was raised with it religiously but truth even as a very young child I knew something did not

Add up and make sense though the adults around me did not seem to care that it did not...I was basically self taught question everything, makes it more interesting...

But I do try to be respectful even though I do fail because I firmly believe some need to believe to help alleviate real fears they might possess....not all believers are fundy types which I gave no patience for....

[beam me up scottie]

29. Well despite claims to the contrary here,

most atheists don't go around looking for reasons to brawl with theists irl.

I usually try to avoid them but when my s/o's relatives get in my face...

[AuntPatsy]

31. I just love that Cat, I had one similar from a rescue facility but sadly he had some serious

Issues so Vet had to put him to sleep, not sure he looked similar in the face though, again love that picture..

[beam me up scottie]

32. I love calicos.

And the attitude is priceless.

[cbayer]

16. This is a lot like self-help books.

Someone takes their personal experience and then naively assumes that everyone else must be just like them.

This is one person's experience. It may explain why some people that grow up without religion come to see religious believers as confused and insane people who believe in fairy tales and why you eventually become terrified by them, give them the finger and spend the rest of your life demeaning them. It might even explain your particular position, muriel, but it doesn't speak for most people at all.

What if someone were to write a story about growing up with religion and came to the following conclusions:

1) The concept of god is not confusing at all

2) The stories that accompany your religion help you make sense out of life

3) You start questioning the sanity of those who do not believe

4) You are not sure if people without religion are just defective and you don't understand why you can't make fun of them

5) You are terrified of those who don't have religion and claim that you are insane

6) You realize that there are many different kinds of beliefs and that whichever one speaks to you is as good as those that speak to others

7) Eventually you realize that some people believe and some don't. You don't give the finger to those who see things differently, but embrace the diversity that you see among humans.

That would be someone's experience and others might relate to some or part of it. In this case, the outcome would be much more positive than that reached by Ms. Ostlund, who appears to be very angry, bitter and hostile towards those that are different than she is.

[muriel_volestrangler]

17. No, it's not like my childhood, but I think you don't understand Mr. Ostlund at all

or his article. It does describe what he felt about religious people when they first impinged on him when he was a child, but the 'terrifying' bit was just people trying to make him believe in hell.

He 'gave the finger' to religion, not the religious people; I'm amazed to see you make that mistake, when so much discussion over the years in this group has been about distinguishing between a religion and its believers. He doesn't 'demean believers' either.

I don't see that he is "very angry, bitter and hostile towards those that are different than he is"; he says "God" is not for him. He is dismissive of "vague, propaganda-like answers that just sound like blatant lies".

"The concept of god is not confusing at all"

Which concept? You think there's only one? The article points out there are different ones, and surely you knew that already.

[cbayer]

18. I think the only part I missed was that he's male, not female.

I believe that this was his experience, I just don't think you can extrapolate it to anyone else.

The article is full of hostility towards the religious, not just religion. I'm amazed that you don't see that when so much discussion over the years in this group has been about distinguishing the two. Questioning people's sanity, making fun of other children because you think their beliefs are like fairy tales - this is about individuals. Are you being coy? If you really can't see how he is demeaning others, that would go a long way in helping me understand why you think you don't.

I'm fine with this being his experience and I would be fine with the one I proposed. Both are valid. The fact that you embrace one and find cause to dismiss the other is exactly why our positions are so different.

[muriel_volestrangler]

19. That's about what he thought as a child when first confronted with religious beliefs

not what he thinks as an adult. He says after their attempts to make him believe in damnation, he walked away from it all.

Where did I dismiss another experience? I asked which concept of god was involved, being surprised you referred to 'the concept' as if there's only one.

[cbayer]

20. The article is entirely about what he thought as a child. So what?

I think there are as many concepts of god as there are people on earth, including nonbelievers. I was referring to an individual's concept.

Stop saying you are surprised and amazed by what I say, mv. You not only expect me to say something you can object to, you hear me say it when it hasn't even happened. Disingenuous to say the least.

[muriel_volestrangler]

21. You've been talking about the author as an adult and in the present

"eventually become terrified by them, give them the finger and spend the rest of your life demeaning them"
" the outcome would be much more positive than that reached by Ms. Ostlund, who appears to be very angry, bitter and hostile towards those that are different than she is"

It's not 'disingenuous' to take your use of words and tenses to mean what they do, rather than what you're now telling us you meant to communicate.

[cbayer]

22. The disingenuous comment was aimed directly at your saying that

you are surprised and amazed at things I say. I can actually picture you with your look of astonishment, refusing to actually accept that I have said something that you don't think makes sense.

Which is hilarious, because you will object to anything I say and I think are probably only truly surprised and amazed when you can't find anything wrong with it.

Who is us? Are there some people doing some rah-rah as you engage in this intriguing debate?

[muriel_volestrangler]

23. 'Us', as I have to tell you for the umpteenth time, is the people who read DU

This is not a private email exchange. Many people, including me, read your posts; therefore 'us' is the correct pronoun to use.

I'm not at all surprised that you've tried to divert the discussion to the use of pronouns, which seems to be something you pretend you just cannot get the hang of.

I will take that as a sign you don't want to say anything constructive in this thread.

[cbayer]

24. I hate to break it to you, but no one is reading our posts,

unless of course someone is stalking one of us.

Of course I can't get the hang of pronouns and I don't want to say anything constructive. I am completely cowed by you and your judgements of me are always so spot on.

Not really.

It is you that has diverted the conversation. There was much more in that post than my comment about pronouns, but you choose only to respond to that. That is generally what you do - ignore the substance you don't want or can't respond to and pick on one little rather innocuous thing.

We wish our initial impressions had been correct and we remain disappointed.

[trotsky]

25. You gave it the old college try, m_v.

But surely you can't be surprised it turned out as it did.

[muriel_volestrangler]

27. By the end, not at all surprised

I thought she was making an honest mistake at first, and she doesn't always misinterpret things on purpose. If it's going to be her standard style from now on, I suppose I could put her on ignore.

[beam me up scottie]

28. muriel succeeded in breaking down her bullshit claims about the author.

cbayer tries to spin every observation about religion into a vicious attack on defenseless religious people.

Here's the part that demolished the irony meter:

That would be someone's experience and others might relate to some or part of it. In this case, the outcome would be much more positive than that reached by Ms. Ostlund, who appears to be very angry, bitter and hostile towards those that are different than she is.

Of course the hit pieces she regularly posts about Gnu AthIesTZ from condescending self-righteous prigs drooling for a chance to bash Dawkins are nothing like that.

She keeps using the word 'disingenuous', I do not think that word means what she thinks it means.

[xfundy]

30. Oh, come on, people!

How hard is it to believe in talking snakes, bushes and donkeys?!1!