I'm praying for....!

[Stuckinthebush]

What is up with friends/family/coworkers who feel a need to say (or post on facebook) that they are praying for people involved in tragic situations.

Example:

Local news story about a UPS plane that crashed last night - this morning on facebook numerous people say, "I'm praying for those UPS pilots who were killed and their families!"

What is the point? Why say this? Just do it. I personally think it will have zero effect on the dead or the living but so be it. If you feel the need to pray why do you feel the need to tell others about it?

Of course, I will point out that I never see the following:

International news story about unrest in Egypt: "I'm praying for those poor souls killed in Cairo today!"

[trotsky]

1. Matthew 6:5-6

One of the few clear, indisputable messages in the bible. Yet it seems to make EVERY kind of Christian uncomfortable - I've even seen liberal ones here try and contest what it means.

Public piety seems to be something most believers enjoy.

[malthaussen]

2. Nah, I disagree.

I love to cite Matthew 6:5 to people, because I do think that many make a point of showing off how pious they are. They have their reward... yes, indeedy.

But in the "I'm praying for so-and-so" type stuff, I think it is really more of a groping, fumbling way to try to express sympathy, especially when there is nothing tangible that can be offered, or it is too inconvenient to offer something tangible.

And let's face it, people often ask for our prayers when they are going through a crisis. That is not a time, I suggest, to lecture them on how prayers are of no efficacy, or to remind them that we don't believe in their god-thing. Prayers are, ultimately, for the prayer, not the ostensible pray-ee.

-- Mal

[Stuckinthebush]

6. I don't disagree with you

I do think that expressions of sympathy to friends or family members is one thing. As in, "Mary, I'm praying for Bobby and hope that the cancer doesn't return."

But publically expression prayers for someone you do not know nor do your friends know is an oddity to me. "I'm praying for that lady in Chicago who has a missing daughter!" That's the kind of public expression of praying that is baffling to me. To what end are you proclaiming this? Just pray. Unless it is a sly way to encourage others to pray for that lady in Chicago I don't understand the motivation to express that this act was undertaken.

I certainly would never lecture anyone about their praying habits in the former (nor the latter either), but I'm curious about the motivation to proclaim that one is praying for someone that is far removed from their lives.

Of course, it could be the act of prayer IS the public expression. These individuals don't really get on their knees and pray but by simply saying "I'm praying for..." they are, in effect, praying.

[malthaussen]

13. I'd tentaively guess it has to do with who's doing the praying...

When the "typical-man-in-the-street" is interviewed about distant events and comes out with "I'm praying for them," I think it is just a public way to express sympathy, especially when there isn't much tangible they can do.

When a public figure comes out with it, I think it is just a cheap way to garner more publicity, since a rich person can always do something tangible about a problem if he wishes. But then events like Newtown are a gray area, since throwing money at it won't fix it.

-- Mal

[Warpy]

3. It's the oldest form of slacktivism

Last edited Wed Aug 14, 2013, 11:46 AM - Edit history (1)

"I'm not going to do a damned thing, myself, but I'll go bother my imaginary friend about it."

[Stuckinthebush]

7. True, but...

What effect does it have to say it out loud? Is it simply a social act or does it have some agency for the person who is doing the deed?

[AtheistCrusader]

10. They think it is reassuring to the recipient.

Because otherwise, they'd have nothing to show for their 'effort' to the person. Nothing at all. The 'recipient' wouldn't even know.

They HAVE to say something. Or, it never happened.

[Stuckinthebush]

12. So the act of praying doesn't exist without public disclosure

Could be.

But, in the situations I most often see these prayer statements the recipient doesn't even know who the prayee is.

[AtheistCrusader]

15. Right. And if the prayee didn't say anything, the recipient would never know.

Unless of course intercessory prayer actually worked, in which case it should be demonstrable.


It's also probably softened in meaning a bit, sort of like saying 'god bless you' or even just 'bless you' when someone sneezes in the room. Once upon a time it carried the connotation of 'hope you don't die', and now it's just a social courtesy.

[Warpy]

11. The person doing it is approval-seeking

All slacktivism is a social act.

[Stuckinthebush]

14. Yes, that's my thought

I am hoping to find something else that explains this act other than social acceptance. I am afraid I won't.

But, if the person honestly believes that the profession of the prayer makes the prayer more "real" then that would be a tad better. Social acceptance sucks as a reason. I think you are correct, though...

[JoeyT]

4. It's just one of many ways to express sympathy.

I actually give them a pass on that one, because I never have any idea what to say in discussions like that. "Wow, that sucks." is about the best I can manage.

As to what they hope it will accomplish if they're actually doing it, I have no idea. I don't know of any religions where praying for the dead makes any difference in what happens to them after they die. All the major ones I can think of pretty much figure once you're dead your eternal fate is locked in and no amount of praying by live people is going to change it.

[Stuckinthebush]

8. That is a good point

Perhaps it is a simply, "Yikes, that sucks" statement.

[Rob H.]

5. Thanks to Twitter, this is what I think of now when I see things like that

And in searching for that, I found this:



(Edited to use smaller images.)

[malthaussen]

9. Oh, I love that and am stealing it for my own.

"I feel like an idiot, I only sent money." Yeah, that speaks very well to the OP.

-- Mal

[Lordquinton]

16. I have encountered it as a shame mechanism too

kinda like "I'm praying for them, why aren't you?" the whole if you're not religious, then you're not a good person kind of thing.

[dimbear]

17. God is in a quandary. You can help Him make up His mind!

Or that's the theory, anyway.

[Evoman]

18. I think it's just a way of expressing sympathy, which can be difficult at times.

Since I've been hit with this cancer crap, I've heard it a lot. Even from people I don't know (like family members church friends). Yeah, I prefer concrete help (anybody who brings me food, helps with dishes, or helps take the pressure off me by donating money since I'm too sick to work is a saint to me). But if people want to pray, send vibes, our do a healing dance (its happened), I take it with Good graces because they mean well. Though, honestly, the people who have helped me the most with my day to day challenges are mostly atheists (I'm a science guy so I have a lot of atheist friends).....funny that, huh?

[Arugula Latte]

19. I don't get why people feel the need to pray to an asshole deity who would cause/allow such tragedy.

I mean, the dude has already proven himself to be a colossal douchebag -- why turn to "him"?