I got this book at a thrift store for $0.40 yesterday. I can't wait to read it

[Heddi]

I put it away before I took a picture of the back cover, which relates how the author currently works in a kitchen at a local public school and uses this position to minister the word and glory of Christ to all the children she comes in contact with

:-/

It's like a Jack Chick tract, but less tolerant

[Arugula Latte]

1. Worshipping nature = dumb

Worshipping long-dead ancient Judean carpenter son of virgin raped by invisible sky deity = smart.

Got it.

[Heddi]

2. that book is full of dumb

I need to get it from the bookshelf and take more pictures. Alas, I have settled in for the day (it's only 2pm heh) and am loathe to get off the sofa

[NYC_SKP]

3. Next in series: "Mommy, why don't we ever see a doctor?"

To be followed by, "Mommy, why does Daddy handle rattlesnakes?"

[Heddi]

4. because God wants you

to have a loveless, sexless marriage just like Mommy and Daddy do....

[Curmudgeoness]

5. Well, I am glad that the churches today

only ask for money. I would really hate Sundays if they were burning animals to please their god. Ugh.

[OriginalGeek]

7. I try not to burn them

but I have damn sure been known to charcoal grill a few animals on Sundays. And Saturdays.

[Curmudgeoness]

9. Make mine rare.

And I'll have a beer with it.

[OriginalGeek]

10. You got it!

that's the best way. Beer and blood.

[progressoid]

6. "They even burned animals to feed the spirits"

ROFLMAO!

Golly, I seem to remember reading in the old Testament about people sacrificing all sorts of goodies to appease God.

[dimbear]

8. Since Linda is down on people that worship statues, I get the vibe that she is a Protestant.

Just a feeling.

[Heddi]

11. according to a page in the book

she is Catholic, and wrote the book when she went to a Christian Bookstore to find a book to explain to her children why her family doesn't celebrate halloween and she was shocked and dismayed to find no book and the person at the bookstore said that in all of their years of selling Christian Books they'd never seen such a tome and what a gosh darn shame it was because God hates children who get free candy and boxes of raisins one night a year.

So she went home and decided gosh darn it, if my kids are gonna have miserable lives without fun then i'm gonna make sure they're not alone and so she wrote this book.

Her "trademark" is a 6-toed left foot because one the dozens of children she birthed had six fingers on each hand and six toes on the left foot, so they made it a trademark like the hallmark card company (they really said that part)

But no, she makes it known she is quite Catholic.

Dang...I really need to get off the sofa and get the book from upstairs and take some more pictures of this ridiculous pamphlet-like book

[dimbear]

12. I'm surprised, but it's not the first time ever I was wrong.

[Heddi]

13. I figured she would be Jehovah's Witness

I have JW's in my family so I am well versed in their revulsion at halloween and all other holidays.

I remember my cousins being at my house during 4th of July. They weren't allowed to go outside and watch the fireworks, but they could watch them on TV. As a child, it was explained that watching outside was actively taking part, while watching on TV was not active participation :-/