Why do we let New Atheists and religious zealots dominate the conversation about religion?

[beam me up scottie]

Last edited Sun Apr 26, 2015, 04:16 PM - Edit history (5)

2 votes, 0 passes | Time left: Unlimited
	Stop being humorless, dogmatic and extremely defensive
	0 (0%)
	We're on the same side as you, stop alienating us
	0 (0%)
	Why are you so angry?
	0 (0%)
	Join Hands & Sing Kumbaya
	0 (0%)
	Why do you hate Michelle Obama?
	0 (0%)
	It's time to put down the swords and side with Those People Who Compare Us to Murderers
	1 (50%)
	You look like you could use some counseling and/or prayer
	0 (0%)
	Shut up bmus, you're just like people who kill cartoonists, blow up women's clinics and stone gay people to death
	0 (0%)
	You're not a high school girl. What's your reason?
	0 (0%)
	Dawiknz!
	1 (50%)
	0 DU members did not wish to select any of the options provided.
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[deucemagnet]

1. If only the atheists and religious nuts would shut up,

then the enlightened liberal religionists could have Serious Theological Discussions(tm). The only problem is that after they congratulate themselves for respecting each other's beliefs, there's not much left to say.

[beam me up scottie]

2. Why are you so defensive?

I mean just because our "allies" compare vocal atheists to religious zealots who kill cartoonists, blow up womens' clinics and stone gay people to death?

What is wrong with you?

We're on the same side, dammit!

[deucemagnet]

3. Oh, it's just my nature as an atheist.

Angry, defensive, foaming at the mouth, always spoiling for a fight and just as bad as the fundamentalist bastards at the other extreme who lop peoples' heads off. Obviously, the most reasonable people are the liberal believers in the middle (just ask them). They occupy an enlightened middle-ground situated between the two extremes like a creamy nougat center. It's really too bad that I'm too angry and bitter to stop carrying water for the Republicans and join hands with such benevolent and tolerant individuals.

[beam me up scottie]

5. Me too.

I am just like religious murderers.

[Warren Stupidity]

6. because stalin.

[bvf]

10. "creamy nougat center"

Nice one.

I hear that stuff is really good for you, too--it's the kumbaya of confections.

[deucemagnet]

11. Ha!

I need more kumbaya in my confections!

[beam me up scottie]

12. How do we know which ones practice Authentic™ religion?

And which ones are talking out of their asses?

[deucemagnet]

13. It doesn't matter.

Because, who are we to question their deeply-held beliefs, kumbaya, etc. Unless we're talking about Scientologists or Mormons. Fuck them.

[beam me up scottie]

14. Hypocrisy.

That's their religion.

[PassingFair]

23. Pray on it.

The voices will guide you.

[beam me up scottie]

29. BUT I CAN'T.....

I'm too angry!

Pray for me.

[mr blur]

19. It's true - you can see it,

in a couple of groups not far from here. Once they ban the atheists (and they do) there's nothing happening except a couple of people talking to themselves or the sound of crickets.

[trotsky]

63. LOL

"after they congratulate themselves for respecting each other's beliefs, there's not much left to say"

Exhibit A: the Interfaith group.

[Warren Stupidity]

4. where is the "because I'm a high school girl" option?

this poll is bullshit.

[beam me up scottie]

7. It's right near the fucking bottom. What the fuck is wrong with you?

[Warren Stupidity]

8. you zealots do this all the time

because hitler

[beam me up scottie]

9. I blame the parents.

Not mine, of course.

[Rainforestgoddess]

15. The answer is always!! 1!daswikieins!*!

Unless, of course, it's!! 1Harrissssssss!!1

[beam me up scottie]

16. I guess I could have combined them...

Dawkinsharris?

Double the rabid reaction, double the fun!

[NeoGreen]

18. Ok, what IS the proper combination????

...

1) Harrkinnnsssss!!!

2) Dawwkisssss!!!

3) Harridawkssss!!

4) Dawkharrrrsss!

Since we ALL know there has to be at least 3 "S"es at the end...


Hmmm....what about...

5) Dennneetttssss!!!

6) Hitchennsssss!!!

or even...

7) DawkHarrDennchenssss!!!!?

Ohhh the possibilities...

And when posted in the "other" place, are they assigned to specific topics?

"Bad people twit words that hurt my fee fees"... Dawkinssssz!!!

"Bad person does a bad thing and hurts my fee fees"... Hitchennnnzszszszsz!!!!

"Bad person completely destroys my irrational argument, rationally, and hurts my fee fees... Dennntttzszszszsz!!!!

"Bad person says I don't need god to be good, and hurts my fee feeessss!!!!!!..... Harrisssszszszszs!!!

Idz godz da sadzzzz feeee feeeesssss!!!!! DawHithDenarrisszszszszs!!


Note to Jury, the above post is full of

[beam me up scottie]

30. Those are worthy of their own poll!

What do we want?

MORE NeoGreen POLLS!

When do we want them?

NOW!!!

[Novara]

17. As a newbie to this group....

....I'm reading along and giggling, but I think there are a couple of those in-jokes you warned me about right here? High school girls? Dawkinz? Can anyone enlighten me? Thanks in advance.

[EvolveOrConvolve]

25. I'm a grouchy old A&A vet and even I don't know what the high school girl thing is

But the "Dawkinz" thing is an old standard. There is a certain group of Serious Liberal Believers here at DU that like to equate Richard Dawkins and other New Atheists to radical Muslims terrorists and abortion clinic bombers, claiming both are equally bad. It's a silly argument that we often parody here in A&A.

[Novara]

26. Ah. That helps. Thank you.

I suppose as I spend more time at DU I'll find out who they are.

[bvf]

59. It won't take long.

There's a holy trinity, plus a couple of wannabes.

[beam me up scottie]

32. Those are all either real responses we've received on DU

or parodies of them.

I just changed a couple of them to reflect the wishes of my fellow evil atheists.

We like to have fun in here, it's a kind of "yo-mama" reaction to that stupid "Why are atheists so angry?" meme.

[skepticscott]

20. Because the alternative is

letting pseudo-progressives use their self-congratulatory pulpit of "moderate" religion as a platform to defend and enable bigotry and violence.

[beam me up scottie]

33. Stop ruining everything scott.

Don't bring facts into the equation, it harshes the buzz they get from posting flamebait.

[mr blur]

21. Never mind...

[beam me up scottie]

35. I think they get a tent in their pants when they do it.

Ho ho ho, LOOK AT ME!!1! I bashed Dawkinz reel good!

[onager]

22. Dammit! Where's the "Join Hands & Sing Kumbaya" option?

[beam me up scottie]

27. Fixed it for you.

onager -

[onager]

60. Aw thanks!

Hope I wasn't too humorless, dogmatic and extremely defensive.

[beam me up scottie]

61. Not as humorless, dogmatic and extremely defensive as the original op.

There is a lot of "anti-catholic" bigotry accusations being thrown around in a Gay Marriage thread in the other room today, if you're taking a stroll later this evening.

It's very tragic.

And ironic, considering the topic.

[EvolveOrConvolve]

24. The bigger question is why do you hate Michelle Obama?

[beam me up scottie]

28. Why, for the same reasons I hate transparency, silly.

I'm a Nazi troll.

[EvolveOrConvolve]

31. Well duh, doesn't atheist = Nazi?

[beam me up scottie]

34. Did you know PeaceNikki stole baby Jesus from the fridge?

But I think he gave her indigestion.

And Hitler couldn't possibly have been a christian, I don't think he ever drank scotch.

[EvolveOrConvolve]

36. Hmmmmm....

[beam me up scottie]

41. I am offended, sir.

I come to DU for philosophical discussion.

[Heddi]

44. WELL HELL YOU CAME TO THE RIGHT PLACE

because on DU ANYONE can be a philosopher! They can be whatever they want to be. Psychotherapist? check! Hip-Hop Record producer? Check! Author of a million tomes? Check! Potter? Check! Masters Degree In All The Things? Check!

Lookitme, frinstance. I invited the sticky substance on the back of EKG leads. And I wrote a best-selling book about sand art in the 15th century. And I'm currently a tenured professor at A Really Great University and I teach applied mathematics combined with Fibre Arts Appreciation. Don't believe me? Too fucking bad.

[beam me up scottie]

47. I had no idea I was in the company of greatness.

And to think with all you've got going for you, you still humble yourself and spend your valuable time being snotty to atheists on DU.

With all of those accomplishments I have to wonder if you're an expert in a new field of scholarly research.

Is there a name for it?

[Heddi]

50. I'd love to tell you but the answer is in my new book

"Why Are Atheists Assholes And Really Who Gives A Fuck?"

Perhaps you've seen some of the exceprts in your, uh, "religion" forum? Bits are posted there daily, nay, hourly!

[beam me up scottie]

53. I have!

Quite a compilation, I can't wait to get my copy.

I can always use another reference volume.

[trotsky]

64. But are you a pottery expert too?

There must be limits to your greatness!

[Heddi]

37. OH ho! Someone must've touched a nerve!

Shape your swords into plowshares, sinner. I'm an Ape-shitist. That means I know ape-shit but don't care either way. By the way, have you read this awesome book called "Children of God'? It's about a jesuit priest who goes on an intergalactic voyage to another planet and has a crisis of faith. Or a faith of crisis. I can't remember which, but I don't care. Because I'm an apeshitist. Have I ever told you that? I don't know if there's a god and it wouldn't affect my life it there was. So there. Eat that.

[beam me up scottie]

39. Oh, Heddi, can I please please please be an apeshitist too?

I know we all need to believe that our own unique brand of faith/non-faith is the specialist of the snowflakes, so much so we have to scour teh interwebs searching for something either no one has heard of or just redefine one that they have.

But won't you share with me?

[Heddi]

43. Yes. Words mean what YOU want them to mean

example:
I have redefined the words so that when I say I'm astoundingly beautiful with a perfect body, I really mean it! Because it means what I want it to mean.

See, it's real easy to do!

[beam me up scottie]

51. So when you say you suffer fools gladly it's true too?

Someone should tell all of the insensitive ignorant folks on DU who got their asses handed to them on a platter by you.

[Heddi]

58. It is true. I love fools

lightly spit roasted with a mustard-based bbq sauce and fried okra on the side. Mmmm.

[Heddi]

38. Yo Dawg!

[beam me up scottie]

40. Oh noes! My fee fees.

[Heddi]

42. Fee fees. Nothing more than fee-fees

You know I should be doing history homework right now but this is too damn fun
?noCache=1430083368

[beam me up scottie]

45. Stealing that one.

Go study, someone has to be able to explain all of that scholarly gobbledy gook we find elsewhere.

Or maybe we're just not doing enough home remedy to get it...

[Heddi]

46. I've been procrastinating this horse-shit assignment all week

I have to pretend to be some class of person in the 1700's and write a letter to my grandchildren about the struggles faced by my class. No choice to be a woman, or a slave. It's a merchant, planter, farmer, etc etc.

I'd much rather write a letter to my grandchildren about how doing this assignment made me want to put hot skewers through my ear-drums as I drank a bottle of lye, but that's not an option.

[beam me up scottie]

48. Stupid professors.

They're so uptight.

I bet they fear you.

[Heddi]

49. I'm in a class of people who use the word "don'tn't"

and can't understand citations.

This is a college class.

I am frightened.


One of the sentences from an essay of a classmate:

"So basically what they're saying is that without these things they colonost would have been happier. I'm like, no, you probably wouldn't have been happier you just think that you would because you don't know what the future holds and you think it's going to be better but you don't know that it is but the colonis just keep up and they don't understand about the indians in the Sever Year War and the French and now the Indians are tranding with the British."

what the everloving actual fuck.

[Heddi]

52. Another Gem on colonial taxation

"After the british left and then the English left, then it was the colonists who said they were tire of taxation and then the Constitution came about and there was no more taxation or tarrif."

No more taxes? HOT DIGGITY DAMN! what the fuck did I just mail to the IRS then?

Classes like this are why high school students shouldn't be allowed to take college classes before they've graduated high school. Or mastered spelling. Or learned to think.

[beam me up scottie]

54. Oh dear.

I see a future tea party candidate.

[beam me up scottie]

55. I wish I was there with you, what fun!

We'd probably get thrown out, though.

[EvolveOrConvolve]

56. I keep asking myself what the fuck is wrong with America

And recently came to the realization that we're surrounded by morons. Exhibit 'A' would be the pathetic piece of writing you posted. How did that person even graduate high school?

[Heddi]

57. They may very well still be in high school

I'm taking US History 1 because my AP US History from HS would have only counted for 1 US history class. I need 2. So this is a beginner History 101 basically. There are high school students taking this class to get dual college & HS credit for the class.

Good in theory, sucks when it comes to group projects, which this class is nothing but. I have a shortcut for "Please provide citations for the information in your essay" on my computer because my fingers would fall off as much as I type it for every group submission.

Couldn't have taken US history the first time...oh no, heddi had to take WORLD history. Why take US history? Most programs WANT world history.

fuck me.

[nil desperandum]

65. Ouch

I am a Director in my current company, having been general manager at a few companies prior to this one and have been fortunate enough to run my own company for a time and I truly feel your pain.

Reading the reports that are submitted from some of these people in our company from departments not under my control are a cross between painful and wildly amusing.

We deal in color science for the printing industry in my department and if you think generic history papers are just awful you should read the entertaining product that arises from someone who knows enough color science "buzzwords" to think they understand the difference between gamuts and lab color Delta E variations for sustainable print color fidelity.

Hopefully the rest of your semester passes less painfully...

[onager]

62. Can't be a woman? Crap. OK, maybe you can be...

Gen. Sir William Howe, 5th Viscount Etc. Commander of British troops in America. His canoodling with a married woman in New York inspired this beautiful Colonial poem:

Sir William he,
Snug as a flea,
Lay all this time a-snoring,
Nor dreamed of harm,
As he lay warm,
In bed with Mrs. Loring.

And if anybody complains, tell the complainer that the poem was written by Francis Hopkinson. Whose name can also be found at the bottom of the Declaration of Independence.

Mrs. Loring's husband got a good job out of the deal. So our ancestors were just like us, but we already knew that. Good thing America went on to be founded by Real Xians who soon put a stop to that sort of thing...

After this class, I can't imagine you want to read any more on the subject. But if you do, I recently read Kevin Phillips' book 1775: A Good Year For Revolution. It's a great detailed read and completely destroys some of those "facts" we Americans start learning in First Grade.