My MIL wasn't able to hold on until Thanksgiving.

[woodsprite]

She passed peacefully on the 25th. The music therapy team from hospice were playing “Pink Skies” for her when she passed. My husband and I made it down to FL in time to sit with her several days before and as she passed.

My 20-something niece and her wife had been caring for her since she came home from rehab in October after a stroke in July. They’ve been absolute rock stars in my opinion. We were there for them as well, otherwise they would have been alone. My SiL (niece’s mom) refused to come see her mom because SIL was on the outs with her youngest son who was visiting to say his goodbyes. She had also refused any texts the day before with health updates and she refused to join the family that stayed for Thanksgiving. I threw myself into pulling together a turkey dinner with stuffing, sides and a few pies for my husbands family. SIL ate take-out Chinese with her hubby. Apparently she doesn’t do Thanksgiving since it is a pagan holiday. Now I’m throwing myself into planning the post funeral reception with my niece and have been working with my daughter scanning family recipes and photos.

A death in the family can definitely bring out the best or the worst in people. I can’t get over the fact that my MiL was laying in bed slowly passing while her brother visited and was going through the house trying to claim stuff. He was told he was not mentioned in the will but after the estate was settled, the rest of the family could claim what they wanted. Before we got down there, my SiL had opened the safe and he took some papers. Don’t know everything he took, but he did take a deed from William Penn that was an original for land granted to the family. He said he would take it and make photocopies for all the kids and grandkids. I don’t anticipate seeing it ever again. There are other things missing as well.

This has been a really rough year.

[SheltieLover]

1. Deepest condolences

It sounds as if your MIL crossed gently with a beautiful send off.

Yes, relatives can sure be jerks. Speaking from experience.

[NNadir]

2. Condolences. I know something about this sort of thing, because exactly 50 years ago, my mother...

...died the day before Thanksgiving.

I certainly adds some difficulty, a holiday on the day of a family loss.

Again, deepest sympathy.

[LoisB]

3. I am so sorry for your loss. Blessings to your niece and her wife to take on that responsibility

at such a young age.

You are correct in that death definitely brings out the best and worst in family.

[anciano]

4. Wishing you strength and comfort....

[MiHale]

5. ...🙏

[brer cat]

6. I'm sorry for your loss. Your greedy relatives should be ashamed.

[Deuxcents]

7. My condolences 💐 You're right..times like this brings out the best in some and the worst in others

[JMCKUSICK]

8. I'm so sorry Woodsprite,

Your loss is sorrow enough, but add the drama? I wish so much better for you and your Mom in Law.

[hamsterjill]

9. I am so sorry for your family's loss.

Loss is particularly hard, in my opinion, around the holidays. And the family dynamics are so many times very difficult to navigate. I pray that you will find the comfort, peace and strength to do what you need to do to have the remembrance of your mother-in-law that you feel is appropriate, and would make her happy.

Take care of yourself during these difficult times.

[iluvtennis]

10. May your MIL Rest in Peace and May her Memory be a Blessing. n/t

[iemanja]

11. I'm so sorry

The death of a family member is hard enough without that sort of unpleasantness.

[MLAA]

12. I'm so sorry you and dear husband had to deal with such unacceptable behavior. Sounds like your SIL's son proved

to be the adult rather than his mom and glad he got to see his grandmother. I can’t imagine anything that would stop me from seeing my mom before she passed if I had the chance. Kudos to your niece and her wife who were such God/Godess sends. 🩷

[Fla Dem]

13. Sorry your MIL passed. Your niece sounds like the only

genuine family member (other than your husband), who cared and treated your MIL with love and caring.

I hope she, your MIL, got more love and caring in her later life.

My sympathies to you, your husband and your niece,

[irisblue]

14. Deepest sympathies on your loss

[AllaN01Bear]

15. ""

[summer_in_TX]

16. I'm so sorry. Hate to hear of how obstructive and uncaring the SIL and your uncle have been.

But your niece and her wife sound like exceptional human beings. And you as well.

Peace and comfort to you and your loved ones.

[murielm99]

17. I am sorry for your loss.

It is true that a loss can bring out the worst in people. I am glad we did not have any of that when my mother died.
She was a monster, but everyone kept it civil in spite of that. Hang in there.