TNN: Dispassionate observers charge Sanders campaign with triangulating against Hillary Clinton

[Fumesucker]

Tardis Network News; Nov 18, 2015.

Dispassionate observers today charged the Sanders campaign with changing their positions constantly in a pathetic and fundamentally dishonest attempt to be as close as possible to the overwhelming favorite Hillary Clinton. In an exclusive interview with TNN an unnamed dispassionate observer pointed out that six months ago Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders were far apart on policy and today they are in almost the same place while Clinton has maintained a solid lead the entire time.

Cynically manipulating policy in order to get closer to the obvious front runner is a serious charge indeed and our panel of Very Serious and Very Dispassionate People has concluded that from a purely objective point of view Bernie Sanders is a Rovian character, a morally depraved liar who is too stupid to be President.

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TNN: We keep our nose in the air our finger to the wind our eye on the ball and our ear to the ground to give you a leg up on staying abreast of what's afoot.

[Snotcicles]

1. I think someone is trying to get closer to The Onion. nt

[emulatorloo]

2. Hilarious parody, thanks!

But you do owe me a new keyboard for "Tardis News Network"! Coffee everywhere

Brilliant!