22 Things You Should Never Say To A Multiracial Woman

[redqueen]

"So where are you from?"

It's a question most mixed-race women are intimately familiar with. And usually, the person asking isn't looking for the name of the town you grew up in, but a detailed breakdown of your racial background.

...

For the most part, people's questions about my own racial background come from a place of genuine curiosity. But comments like "you don't act black" or "you don't look as white as you sound" are often tinged with frustration that I can't be easily categorized and filed away as a person of a specific racial background. "I don’t know exactly when it became completely okay to ask a random stranger which one of their progenitors stepped outside the narrow queue of their own race and decided to knock boots with someone of another race," wrote Kristin Booker in September 2012. "I find this line of questioning really irritating and incredibly invasive."

...

We asked our readers to tell us what comments multiracial women are tired of hearing. Here are 22 of their responses:

1. "Which parent is which?"

2. "No, I mean where are you REALLY from?"

3. "Can I touch your hair?"

4. "I thought you were white."

5. "Are you sure that's what you are?"

...

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/07/22-things-you-should-never-say-multiracial-woman_n_4057750.html

OMG that last one.. I hate when people do that. And number 4 too. :/

[dipsydoodle]

1. Healthy reminders.

Thanks for posting.

[JustAnotherGen]

2. Awesome thread!

Thanks for posting this!

My number 21: Are you adopted? Is that REALLY your mother?

[redqueen]

3. Ha, and the suspicion when our kids have varying traits...

My advice to multi racial women who are pregnant - make sure your partner understands genetics!

And you know it is my pleasure to share this

[Tuesday Afternoon]

4. DU Rec

thanks for posting this.

[kickysnana]

5. After reading that I think that I would run not walk away from any contact at all. LOL.

My family fits the description multiracial and all we need is well meaning people making up arbitrary rules on what strangers say or not say.

People say dumb things constantly and making someone uncomfortable by having a special set of rules to speak only to you only makes the problem worse.

Besides, you might miss out on a great new friend that you can tease later. "Hey you remember when you said...?"

"To err is human, to forgive is divine."

As humor this is great, for bringing us together, not so much.

[redqueen]

8. Explaining that something is rude is considered making up a special set of rules?

Most people would rather not be rude, I'd think. Guess it takes all kinds.

[nomorenomore08]

9. I wouldn't say these are special or arbitrary rules. Just ways to avoid being rude

which can be applied to anyone.

[NuclearDem]

6. A few days ago I found myself guilty of #13 in a conversation with a Native American friend of mine.

I'm actually so ashamed of it I can't bring myself to post what I actually said, but nevertheless, I profusely apologized to her almost immediately afterward.

Not one of my finer moments.

[MadrasT]

7. Those were painful to read.

I am sorry people have to hear things like that.

[Doctor_J]

10. You remind me of

Norah Jones...Jessica Alba...Rashida Jones...Aisha Tyler

those would be compliments, coming from me.

[JoeyT]

11. Another one I hate

is when complete strangers walk up and ask "What ARE you?!". It's as much the tone that question is always spoken in as it is the question itself.

[CrispyQ]

12. "You're a mutt."

15. "Are your parents still together?"

20. "Were your grandparents okay with it?"

Wow. Just wow.