Fluid Relativity just oozes here

He did me wrong, I forgive, you won't, I'm better without you, you're a snail and a creep, I needed to move on ... where does it end? Therapy as drama.

It's a world without rules and amorphous social norms and mores now ... sadly ... only solution is communication up front that explores, uncovers, and protects ... as a society we're not having that conversation yet ... I don't think it's a message that resonates when consumers are expected to assume the submissive position for capitalists and their producers. Tough to be sub at the department store while dominant at the bar.

One common but mistaken belief is that forgiveness means letting the person who hurt you off the hook. Yet forgiveness is not the same as justice, nor does it require reconciliation, Worthington explains. A former victim of abuse shouldn't reconcile with an abuser who remains potentially dangerous, for example. But the victim can still come to a place of empathy and understanding. "Whether I forgive or don't forgive isn't going to affect whether justice is done," Worthington says. "Forgiveness happens inside my skin."

... Research has shown that forgiveness is linked to mental health outcomes such as reduced anxiety, depression and major psychiatric disorders, as well as with fewer physical health symptoms and lower mortality rates. In fact, researchers have amassed enough evidence of the benefits of forgiveness to fill a book; Toussaint, Worthington and David R. Williams, PhD, edited a 2015 book, "Forgiveness and Health," that detailed the physical and psychological benefits.

... While stress relief is important, Enright believes there are other important mechanisms by which forgiveness works its magic. One of those, he suggests, is "toxic" anger. "There's nothing wrong with healthy anger, but when anger is very deep and long lasting, it can do a number on us systemically," he says. "When you get rid of anger, your muscles relax, you're less anxious, you have more energy, your immune system can strengthen."

The present study indicates that beyond reducing depression and anxiety, state forgiveness may be a key facilitator of general cognitive, emotional and social wellbeing outcomes.

Numerous peer-reviewed studies found evidence that people who have a drink or two a day are less likely to have heart disease than people who abstain or drink excessively.

But the new study, while noting the lower risks of heart disease from moderate drinking, as well as a dip in the diabetes rate in women, found that many other health risks offset and overwhelm the health benefits. That includes the risk of breast cancer, larynx cancer, stroke, cirrhosis, tuberculosis, interpersonal violence, self-harm and transportation accidents.

“Current and emerging scientific evidence does not suggest that there are overall health benefits from moderate drinking,” said Robert Brewer, who directs the alcohol program at the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and was not involved in the new research. He pointed out that alcohol studies have long been dogged by “confounders” — factors that create a misleading impression of cause and effect.

“People who report drinking in moderation tend to be very different from people who don’t drink at all. They tend to be a healthier population, they tend to exercise more, they tend to be more affluent, they tend to have more access to health care,” Brewer said.

Studies show saturated fat raises LDL, yet it also raises HDL ("good" cholesterol). On the other hand, sugar lowers HDL. Ultimately, the ratio of total cholesterol to LDL cholesterol better predicts heart attacks than LDL on its own. Coconut oil can contain up to 40 percent saturated fat, yet interestingly, countries with the highest intakes of coconut oil have the lowest rates of heart disease.

While some research shows coconut oil contains higher amounts of saturated fat and does increase total cholesterol, those amounts do not increase our heart attack or stroke risk. In fact, one study among lean, heart-disease- and stroke-free Pacific Islanders who consumed up to 63 percent of their calories from coconut fat found total cholesterol rose but so did their "good" HDL.