Do you personally know anyone who's committed suicide?

[Another Jackalope]

9. Well, it's complicated.

My late partner/soulmate contracted ovarian cancer four years ago. She had always felt that being here was some kind of mistake, and saw this as a free ticket out.

She decided she didn't want to wait for the misery to run its course. She didn't trust the medical profession to perform MAiD (Medical Assistance in Dying - legal in Canada), so she decided to end it herself. She asked me to help, and I said I would. She was my soulmate - anything she wanted I would do my best to provide.

We couldn't find pure helium, so the next best option on the list was carotid compression by ligature.

I sat with her as she tightened the cord around her throat. I told myself not to move.

The next few minutes were the most horrifying of my life.

It didn't work, so when she signaled me, I cut the cord.

The next morning she applied for MAiD, and was approved. Two weeks later I sat with her again as she died peacefully in our living room.

I will never fully recover from the experience, but I still believe to my core that suicide is a human right.