Harry and Meghan. Reason to pay attention

[ShazzieB]

83. I'm sure they knew "it was out there."

Or at least Meghan knew. Harry may well have been taken by surprise, as white people often are shocked when we come face to face with racism. We know it exists, but we can nonetheless be quite comfortably insulated by our white privilege until and unless we are directly affected by it. And being a royal, I imagine Harry was even more insulated by privilege than most "regular" white folks (like me) would be.

As a poc, Meghan has of course dealt with racism her entire life, but I think the intensity and sheer viciousness of what she's been subjected to since her relationship with Harry went public probably took even her by surprise. As a royal, he is automatically subjected to a level of public scrutiny and judgment that I personally can't even imagine, and his marrying an American would have probably brought on a firestorm of public disapproval, regardless of any other factors involved. Add to that the fact that she's a poc, and that firestorm got jacked up by an order of magnitude.

In short, what they have had to deal with is, imo, something beyond just plain old, garden variety racism. I don't find it at all surprising that neither of them was able to anticipate the full extent of what they were going to be confronted with. He had no experience with having someone he cares about being the target of such ugly, virulent hatred, and she had no experience with being a member of the royal family or the massive public expectations that entails. I don't think anyone on the outside of that situation is in a position to make pronouncements about what they "should" have expected or been prepared for.

Lastly, making pronouncements of that sort smacks of "blaming the victims" and of the "just world" theory that says people bring their problems on themselves and therefore "get what they deserve," both of which, quite frankly, seem excessively judgmental and unkind to me.