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In reply to the discussion: I have ended a friendship with a MAGA [View all]blubunyip
(243 posts)but if they persist in their MAGA viewpoint, it's like they've gone away already. Some liberals are way too tolerant, way too nice. We're inclined to give people the benefit of the doubt, disinclined to write them off forever. Magas know this and bank on it. But these current insane times are a clear litmus test. If they like what's going on now, if they have no cognitive dissonance whatsoever, there really is NO hope. Engaging is a waste of time.
Sometimes you just have to show people the boundaries. It can be done without confrontation--in dealing with rigid personality types, you just become scarce, which can be done even if the situation requires further association on occasion. But if you keep close ties with people who you fundamentally do not respect, you will only lose yourself in the end. As the Samurai put it, "Do not allow a place for the sword to enter." A mental thing, not only physical. Do not be suckered back in out of misguided pity, a compassionate heart, or pangs of nostalgia. "He's really a good person" doesn't work as an excuse. (No, he's not). Put compassion elsewhere, deliberately. It's a practice that gets easier with time.
First step is accepting that there is a huge non-negotiable divergence. Congratulations on extricating! Thanks for posting.
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