At this point, it is more than a 'bad day'.

[OldBaldy1701E]

Having panic attacks every day gets tiresome. While my hubby is at work, I am here alone. I have no one else to talk to. No one else around here wants to bother with me. (Again, multiple cities in five states, and I have never had a problem with meeting people and making friends. Here? Oh well...)

I am having to face the fact that I should sell my guitars, as my hand is messed up and I don't play them anymore, and our future is in dire straits. All I ever wanted was a Telecaster. I finally got one in 1991. It is a 1977 and is one of the last batches made in the US before they started factories overseas. It is all I ever wanted. Now it just sits in my closet in its case. Like a body that I feel I need to hide because it reminds me of my own metaphorical death. But, the idea of getting rid of them is making me literally get weak in the knees and short of breath. I guess it will be the ultimate example of how miserably I failed in life when I have to part with those comrades that I developed a relationship with to do what I did. Keeping them around, it kind of seems as if I am not done yet, even though I am. Oh, boy, am I done. I am so done. But, I am really struggling with doing what needs to happen here.

I hope everyone is having a better day/month/year. There are only four months left in this year and I am wondering if we are going to make it.