weighing you down too! 😳
I never met a Baptist until I went to College. I grew up in white-bread protestant country in the north. We were Lutheran, but my paternal grandmother was a Jehovah's Witness. When we were small my sister and I stayed with her during the day during summer recess, because my Mom and Dad both worked. She forced us to go to her "bible studies" with her, but we raised such a ruckus she'd make us go outside and play. 😊 Thank you!
In our church I'd see the same people on Sundays singing hymns of praise, who I saw Saturday night out drinking and pawing at each others' wives (and vice-versa).
So at a young age I got to see the craziness of religion along with it's hypocrisy. Lessons well learned.
Sounds like you're dealing well with your childhood abuse, but you'll never know what could have been in a more normal environment. Don't dwell on things in the past. Don't let those thoughts linger. Forward, always look forward, and be the person you want to be, not what some person or myth wants you to be. Hold your head high and greet the world with the goodness you've created within yourself. That's the greatest feeling of all.
Take care my friend. 
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