Is 13 too young to be a jerk?

[Tab]

My son just turned 13 a few weeks ago. He's always been a sweet kid, and still often is, but magically within weeks he's had a major attitude shift. I blame hormones, but still, what can I do about it? He's a typically hormonic teenager - his teacher says all the boys his age are like that - but it's driving us nuts. Doesn't want to do schoolwork, answer questions, or anything.

I kind of remember being a jerk when I was 15 or 16, but 13 seems a little young.

????

[wildeyed]

1. I think you were just a late bloomer.

13 seems about right for hormonal angst. I was a PITA at 13, and on the upswing by 16.

[Sabriel]

2. I have a 10 y.o. who's just vicious on occasion

It doesn't help that she's the master of the cutting, sarcastic comment, or that she's quite a bit more intelligent than I am.

So, 13 seems fine to me.

[knowbody0]

3. my guess,

he's getting wood about a hundred times a day, doesn't understand, loves it, hates it.

change is hard on us human beans.
my grown son and I had a conversation and he explained to me his reality back in the day. I had no idea, he'd put on his walkman, listen endlessly to guns and roses, with his hoodie up. he just shut me out of his universe.

it will pass. love him lots !

[tigereye]

4. my son just turned 13, and he has some attitude, mostly at home

but it's not too bad most of the time. I think a lot of teens have "attitude" but as long as they do what you want them to (after complaining), it's probably not a big deal.


It's hard trying to see where the line is - sometimes they need a clear message that the attitude needs to be adjusted (I always mimic turning a dial) or privileges are not forthcoming. That has worked for me.

:hi: Hang in there.

[seabeyond]

5. mine turned 14 a couple days ago. argue about EVERYTHING.... i mean

everything. lordy. lol. whatever i say now. and he says, no no, i am not arguing. well ya. stupid stuff. irrelevent stuff. stuff i dont care about.

and

cant remember the other, cause hasnt dont it for a while.

attitude, ya.

started about 13. but doesnt take much once we realize we are in a pattern again and discuss it. then we are both aware for a while and work on it. on the whole though, this kid doesnt want to be the typical teen and works hard not falling in line. that alone i appreciate and am thankful for, so some slack.

there is so much more at this age i love

[katsy]

6. Mine aren't there yet.

But I'm preparing for it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KSwptm5v1wg

[pnwmom]

7. No. It often starts earlier -- and they're getting BETTER by the time they're

going on 16.

I saw my friend's son go through this, starting when he was about 11. So when my own son turned 11, and developed the same attitude, I kept reminding myself that the other boy (age 16 by then) had come through it -- so would mine. (And he did!)

Maybe the reason you remember this at the age of 15 or 16 is because that is when you finally became AWARE of the jerkiness of your behavior. (And once you became aware, you were on your way to ending it.)