So Jesus walks into an Inn with 3 nails in his hand

[undeterred]

and says "Can you put me up for the night?"

[piratefish08]

1. .

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Skeeve]

2. I thought I'd heard them all..

but that was new to me, thanks.

:headbang:

[Lars39]

3. or as matcom has said: Bob Villa would have used decking screws.

:P

[BlueJazz]

4. Another oldie....

Jesus: Paul...PAUL!, PAUL!
Paul: What?
Jesus: Damn..this is high...I can see your house from up here.

[onager]

5. "Judas, come here."

Said Jesus from the cross.

"I'm not coming over there," said Judas. "I ratted you out to the Romans. If I come any closer, you'll zap me with a lightning bolt or something."

"No, Judas. I forgive you. And I have a special blessing for you before I die. But you must come closer and stand right under the cross."

"Well...alright, I guess..."

"Ha! PISS ON YOU, JUDAS!"

[BlueJazz]

6. LOL! Good one

[WhollyHeretic]

7. That's really not appropriate

It's more of an Easter-time joke :evilgrin:

[and-justice-for-all]

8. "I got a hand full of nails and a crucifix, just in case I get board"

- "Look what the bats dragged in" by Wednesday13 http://www.wednesday13.com/

[onager]

9. Moving slightly off-topic...

In Belgium, two nuns are riding their bikes thru a beautiful old village of cobblestoned streets.

Nun One: "This is really lovely! I've never come this way before!"
Nun Two: "Me either. Must be the cobblestones."

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In Transylvania, a young nun and and an old nun from the Bronx are driving their rental car thru a Dark and Stormy Night.

Suddenly a vampire lands on the hood and bares his fangs.

Young Nun: "Quick, Sister! Show him your cross!"
Old Nun rolls down window and yells: "Hey! Get off the fucking car, asshole!"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Three nuns are driving to church one morning when their car is T-boned by a semi. Suddenly all 3 are standing in front of St. Peter.

St. Peter asks the first nun: "Have you ever touched a penis?"
First Nun: "U-h-h-h-h...once, but only by mistake. I think my arm may have accidentally brushed a gentleman's private parts..."

St. Peter: "Go over to that urn of holy water, sprinkle some on your arm, and enter Heaven!"

St. Peter turns to the second nun and asks, "Have you ever touched a..."

The third nun interruputs: "Stop right there, buster! I'm not putting that water in my mouth after her ass has been in it!"

[Q3JR4]

10. ...

Electrons have mass? I didn't even know they were christian!

Q3JR4
Video games teach you the darndest things.

[muriel_volestrangler]

11. You triclavianist heretic, you!

http://objectiveministries.org/pastorscorner/#08-13-2003

Some people actually take this seriously: http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/10672a.htm

[SkyDaddy7]

12. Like it!!