Remind me never to attend another family function again if I can help it.

[Ladyhawk]

I wrestled with myself this morning over whether or not to show up at my brother's house for a family get-together. With my family, I am never sure what to expect. Five minutes after I arrived, my mother and I got into a fight. I should have left, but as I was walking out the door she persuaded me to stay. So I sat on the couch for a couple of hours, feeling completely out-of-place.

As soon as I got into my car, the dam burst. I cried all the way home and I'm crying now. It just ain't worth it. I need to stay away from those people.

[hedgehog]

1. I' m sorry to hear this.

Family is supposed to be the safest refuge of all. Talk to someone who knows you and can walk you though this with good advice. I'm afraid that anything else I'd say may be inadvertently hurtful or harmful, and you don't need that now. Be nice to yourself this week.

[mopinko]

2. a safety net with a big hole.

i have been wrestling with my family situation as well. i have kinda decided that i am 50 years old, i don't have to do anything i don't want to, and that includes spending a boodle of money to drag my kids out to california in july for my brother's wedding.
the only people in my family that i was really fond of have mostly been mainlining extra strength koolaid for a while. since my mom passed a few years ago, i don't have much reason to put up with them. i had a long time when i did need them, and they were assholes about it. i hated my brother as a kid, and he is still a jerk.
i know you are in a situation where you need them, but sometimes anything is better than depending on assholes.
my advice to you is to pretend they are dead. i know that doesn't solve your problems, but neither will they.
take care, fuck them.

[mopinko]

5. just wanted to add

that my post is one of those blurts, an intersection of my current bucket o' pain and yours. take it as commiseration more than advice.

[Random_Australian]

3. I have no advice. I thought I'd add something to make you feel better.

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:
                                                  :loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya:
                              :loveya::pals::pals::pals::pals::hug::hug::hug::hug::pals::pals::pals::pals::loveya:
          :loveya::loveya::loveya::pals::pals::pals::hug::hug::hug:YOU ARE HERE:hug::hug::hug::pals::pals::pals::loveya::loveya::loveya:
                             :loveya::pals::pals::pals::pals::hug::hug::hug::hug::pals::pals::pals::pals::loveya:
                                                  :loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya::loveya:
:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

[Lilith Velkor]

4. I'm so glad you didn't leave us, Ladyhawk

And hey, you put in an appearance, so that's a good excuse to stay away for a good long while.

That's what my uncle (who also has PTSD) and I do, we only show up at gatherings maybe once a year.