Looking for advice

[Holly_Hobby]

My Mom, age 73, has been bipolar for many years. When I was a child, she was on Lithium and Thorazine. She wouldn't take her meds regularly and then gave them up completely until recently.

Six weeks ago, my brothers and I strongly suggested she get help - she was manic and very, very mean. She was hospitalized for 2 weeks and put on Depakote. Her psychiatrist said her thyroid condition stops her from being able to take Lithium now.

She's no better. The psychiatrist said it would take time, but she's so mean and vindictive to me and my brothers (and spouses).

So here's the real problem - she wants to buy a new car. She leases, but her lease isn't up until next year. She's got salesmen from all over the city calling her with deals.

Should we try to intervene? Thanks. Me and my brothers really don't know if we should react or not.

[no name no slogan]

1. I would try to talk to her doctor

You don't say how long it's been since she was hospitalized or since she went on the new meds, but making big, sudden purchases (like a car) can definitely be a manic sypmtom.

And the doctor is right about the meds: it usually takes 4-6 weeks for new meds to start to work, but it can take longer too.

I would talk to your mother and try to get her to postpone the car purchase.

[mdmc]

2. intervene!

Sounds like she needs your help. Peace, and God Bless.

[Droopy]

3. You can try to intervene

but based on my own experience there's probably not a whole lot you can do to prevent her from buying the new car. When I was suffering from my symptoms, including mania, there was nothing anyone could tell me to make me change my mind. I would see it as some sort of attempt on their part to hold me down in some way. I guess it can't hurt to try, though.

Would it hurt your mother financially if she were to buy the car? If so, that would be the angle I'd pursue in an attempt at intervention.

[mopinko]

4. i agree with droopy. unless you can get power of attorney,

you are not likely to succeed with her. if you can intercept the sales people, you might have some success. how many are there? if it isn't too oppressive, call the mangers of the dealerships and tell them that if they sell her a car, your attorney will void the sale in court, that she is incompetent to make a contract. maybe she will forget about it if they are not calling.
i would try to find out who else is calling. when telemarketers get a senior that they can bilk, it spreads like wildfire. when a kid steps in and threatens to sue, they usually pack it up.
good luck. you are in a tight spot.

[Quakerfriend]

5. Yes, great advice mopinko. My elderly mother, who

was unipolar, bought car after car after car! I kid you not!

You should most definitely call the dealership and also, call her Dr. and let him/her know that you are concerned about your mom's compulsive behavior. In truth, he is obligated under the law to protect her from herself, if you know what I mean. However, because of privacy laws he may not even take your call.

I would also call the do not call registry and have her # put on it- for her own protection.

Please, let us know how it all works out.