After trying for over a month on my own, today I met with a grief

[yy4me]

councilor. It was a hard call to make and very frightening to go see her. I have never had any therapy before, I was afraid of what to expect.
The woman was very nice, gave me some things to really think about doing to help this empty feeling I have had since my husband died. This house is so full of everything that was our life. I cannot seem to have a few moments to think of how to cope. I want to put him in a part of me that I will always remember, not be so afraid to move, to think, to sleep.

Right now, I cannot cope with his death, I don't know how. Perhaps with this lady's help, I can progress a little. Maybe feel like eating, perhaps get a nights sleep. I am a very strong person but this has defeated me. 45 years is so long that you become like one person. I don't know how to do it alone.

We worked together for years, raising the kids, running a business, restoring this 200 year old house. There was hardly anything we did not do together. I don't know if that was good, but through the years it worked.

At night when I try to sleep, I see the two of us walking down the street holding hands and then the picture fades away into the fog. I can't stand it any more. I hope when I see her next week, I can be a little encouraged.

[elleng]

1. You've taken the right step;

good luck to you.

[blue neen]

2. I am so very sorry for your loss.

I lost my dear mother in February. It has been a very difficult time...life really is unfair.

The dreams can be very disturbing. Even if you manage to find some peace during the day, it seems as though the dreams at night just won't let you really have any solace. They actually do start to fade a bit with time.

Grief counseling really did help. Your husband must have been a wonderful man to have experienced the love of someone as special as you are. Good luck...just take one day at a time.

[easttexaslefty]

3. you do it just like you are doing it

one day,one hour, one moment, one breath at a time.
Grief counseling really helped me, meds can help, but mostly you just have to go through the grief. I'm here anytime you want to talk.
<[[[hug>]]]]

[Cabcere]

4. Hey yy4me

First of all, I am very sorry to hear about the loss of your husband. :hug: I think you're making a good call on seeing a counselor - it is definitely scary at first, but I've found that it really can help to be able to talk about it and sort of have someone to help you work through things. :pals: I wish you peace and strength during this difficult time.