So I got an Rx for Wellbutrin ...

[Myrina]

... after 2+ years of blah-life and behavioural therapy that helped me unearth why I am as dysfunctional as I am ... last month my therapist and I did an exercise where I wrote down all the things I missed/didn't get to do growing up because of my alcoholic/absent parents ... and I think seeing it all in front of me, overwhelmed me and I shut down.

Literally spent 2 weeks not able to get out of my pajamas, just lying in bed crying.
Didn't cook, didn't do household chores, didn't walk the dogs, couldn't focus ... nothing.
I am supposed to start a new job on Monday and I am dreading the thought: I absolutely do not want this job, or to work for this company, but I know I have to in order to meet my expenses (I'm single - no spouse/co-earner).

So she referred me to a co-hort of hers who can prescribe, and yesterday I picked up the Wellbutrin.

Anyone with insight on the drug at all?

Thanks! O8)

[Droopy]

1. I was prescribed a light dose for depression and it seems to work well for me

I'm not sad all the time anyway. I think the drug also help me quit smoking. I know they use it for that and when I quit my withdrawal symptoms and cravings weren't as tough. I take 150 mg/day. The generic form of the drug is bupropion and that's what I get. It's cheaper than the name brand stuff. I wish well and hope the job works out.

[Dorian Gray]

2. My husband takes it

He's been on it for years as he's suffered mild depression (used to be severe, but when he quit drinking, the depression depleted somewhat) and anxiety.

It's helped him immensely, though he's on low dosages.

Just make sure the doctors keep an eye on how it works with your particular chemistry. And be honest about how you feel on it. Different drugs work for different people.

[elleng]

3. I took it for a while, along with another anti-d;

Seemed to work OK.

Be sure to follow dosage instructions carefully. These things take a while to kick in.

Check in here and/or with therapist.

Good luck.

[Ocracoker16]

4. I have been on it for 5 years

It has worked well for me. I have been on numerous anti-depressants, but Wellbutrin has been one of the most effective ones for my depression. However, not everyone does well on it. You should take the medicine as the doctor prescribed and get in touch with the doctor if you have any bad side effects.

[no name no slogan]

5. I took it brieflly, and didn't react well to it

However, I know of many people who have had success while taking it.

The side effects were unbearable in a lot of ways for me: the sensitivity to smells in particular were bad. I was nauseous most of the two months I took it.

Good luck on it, and don't be afraid to question your doctor about it.

[Myrina]

6. Update: 1 month later ...

.... I'm still at the job, although its pointless (it doesn't pay enough to meet my expenses and since I'm a temp basically they all ignore me and I spend all day surfing the net - which exacerbates my depression/feelings of isolation).

I think the Wellbutrin has made me functional anyway; I don't get pissed off in traffic anymore, the drive to/from work seems alot shorter than it did before the meds ... but I still find myself 'zoning out' occassionally - just sitting there, staring into space and thinking until the tears take over.

I wonder about the meds ... why should I be taking meds that 'hide' the reality that I should be depressed because MY LIFE REALLY DOES SUCK? I guess what I'm trying to say is if you had a broken bone, you wouldn't want to ignore the break and just take 'happy pills', you'd want to set the break so it could heal. So why do docs want to prescribe 'happy pills' to gloss over a broken soul?

Last appointment with my psych, she insisted that I contact all my friends and insist that they do whatever it takes to get me out of the house and help bring me back into 'society' ... well, guess what? Crickets. My so-called friends, who have always been partially invisible, continue to be so. And it hurts as much as it did before the meds ... I still feel totally inconsequential, alone and isolated. Unless I go to shopping or someplace where 'social interaction' is a mandatory part of a purchase, I can go days on end without being spoken to/acknowledged. I am - for all intents and purposes - invisible. And no pills are going to heal that.

[elleng]

7. Thanks for making me think.

Which came first: Depression when? Lost job (closed agency); took years to exhaust options during much of which time very well paid for contract work. Finally options exhausted, and husb criticised, was (is) intemperate, finally assaulted me so I moved out. He interferes with my relations with daughters. NOW he is forcing me to SUE him to obtain my share of proceeds for newly sold house. Maybe when he does pay, I'll actually look for psych help.

Thanks again, Myrina.

[no name no slogan]

8. Sounds to me like the pills are working

You're able to examine your life, and you have some ideas on what you need to improve it. Your brain is working in ways it did not with just psychotherapy. Do you think you would have gained this insight without taking Wellbutrin?

And no drug alone can heal depression. Only you can do that. But you are already on that path, which is a big step! :hug:

[Myrina]

9. I see where you're coming from ...

... on some level I 'knew' what was wrong with my life (some would say I was an 'excessive hermit'), I just wasn't aware 'how I got here' ... uncovering the behavior patterns etc that were imprinted in my childhood/adolescence with alcoholic and emotionally unavailable parents is what led to my crash/needing the meds. The full realization of 'why I am the way I am' overwhelmed me.

However, the ways I can change my life require alot of input/support from people who aren't willing to be there for me, so I'm still
in the same spot I was before the shut-down, just now I have the meds to make me more functional so I can constantly be reminded of how isolated/lonely/unfulfilled I am ... it's kindof a Catch22.

[no name no slogan]

10. Have you thought of a support group?

For some reason, I have always done best when I have a support group of people in similar situations. They are oftentimes more able to be objective about what you're experiencing, as they don't have any of the "baggage" that friends bring into the picture. Also, if they are dealing with the same things you are, their experience can be very helpful.

Oftentimes, I've found a support group to be of more use than seeing a counselor. Also, a support group is a good way to meet some new people and make some new friends-- ones who will be receptive and sympathetic to what you're going through.

Talk to your therapist, or contact your local chapter of NAMI (www.nami.org). They can direct you to resources that will help.

I'm not a professional by any means, but I've been through more depressive episodes than I can count (bipolar disorder: the gift that keeps on giving ;) ), and I think you may find some comfort in a support group. Give it a look. :hug:

[Myrina]

11. Excellent idea, thank you

:-) I'll do some research locally and ask my therapist if she knows of any ... O8)

:hug:

[elleng]

12. Thanks for the info; nami group may coincidentally

provide helpful 'analysis' for what I mentioned/thought of above. What do you think?

[no name no slogan]

13. Absolutely. Causation is a very difficult thing to decipher

and us type of folk tend to second-guess every action we take, so that doesn't help out any, either.

In my experience, I've always found advice from people in the same situation to be very valuable. It may not be as academic as that from a therapist, but sometimes you can't beat life experience.

Best of luck to you! :hug:

[elleng]

14. I've just learned that I have to try to explain to my daughters

why they feel they've 'lost' their mother.