Hi, everybody...............

[TheDebbieDee]

I'm starting to feel lonely again and I'm hoping you all can help me get through this easier.............

I'll obsess about my lonliness for the next couple of weeks, plot a plan to become unlonely, follow my plan for a while, then get over the feeling of lonliness and move on.

But, I'll know that next month, or six months from now or next year, I'll go through all this again, and still wind up alone, again!

I could use your suggestions. Got any?

[bemildred]

1. I'm not sure what the problem is.

Is it the cycle that bothers you, or being alone? Is it stability you want - steady company at a level you like - or a way to never feel lonely?

[TheDebbieDee]

4. Hi, Bemildred..........

It's the being alone that bothers me........only sometimes I'm too busy to notice that I'm lonely. I have young adult daughters (22 and 19 years old) and they are a blessing, but they have lives and friends of their own.

In the near future, I'm facing empty nest syndrome and my life will be centered around work and hanging out with you guys at DU and other message boards that I visit.

I think I would prefer to never feel lonely again...........

[Chowlie]

2. What are things that make you feel not lonely?

Like talking to people online or does it need to be in person? Can it be a casual chat or does it need to be a deeper conversation?

[TheDebbieDee]

5. Interacting with people.......

discussing ideas, engaging in a spirited, but not rude, political debate....but I think I need to start doing these things face-to-face......

My worst fear is that I'll become a hermit and die alone!

[IronLionZion]

3. The first step would be to decide what exactly you want.

You're going to have to do that on your own.

Everything else would depend on that. If you know what you want, then you can seek out suggestions on how to get there.

[Wapsie B]

6. For me, I've rarely felt lonely by myself.

It's normally when I'm in a crowd that I feel the most alone. It's not as if I don't want to be around others, because I do. I just don't go out of my way to fit in, no matter what the group. That can come across as being aloof and standoffish and unfriendly to some.
I have a hard time making real friends. Funny thing is, one is supposed to do what one loves in life, and talking about politics and current events is one of the things I truly enjoy in life. So one would think that amongst like-minded individuals most anyone would find some kind of friendship bond with one or two. But not me. However I believe I'm not unique in that respect.
I'd just do what you what you really enjoy doing. That's really all any of us can do. As the Cajuns say,"Laissez les bons temps rouler!"