I have been so depressed lately

[w8liftinglady]

since my diagnosis of Lupus,seizures,heart block,I have had nothing but one catastrophe after another-physically and financially.I consider myself very fortunate ,as I have health insurance,but my take home pay has been cut in half...and I am non-productive.Have you ever thrown your hands in the air and wondered "why me?"
Guess I'm just looking for a kindred spirit,now that I can't drink my problems away anymore.:cry:

[murielm99]

1. I am sorry.

I wish I could do more than offer my support.

[mopinko]

2. why me is the central question in the sicky universe.

although, why do i keep thinking that i can make the future better than the present is my current favorite. i continue to think that i will manage to have an art career of some sort, when i should probably get into the practice of making stuff and just burning it, and saving my family the trouble of getting rid of it after i die. i am taking a web design class one night a week, and i drag myself home every time wondering why i am going to so much trouble.
and don't even get me started on continuing to see new docs, have new tests, try new drugs just to feel the same old shitty.

i wish i knew the secret to just declaring myself retired, and living in the present. seems like some peace to be had there, just can't find the way.