I am having some trouble keeping it together. My husband of

[yy4me]

45 years died Friday of a massive Hemorrhagic stroke. He was healthy and fit. Life is cruel. He was a great man who loved everyone. (with the exception of some washington people). I was blessed to have him and I don't know how I will get through this.
I just needed some ont to talk to. Thanks for listening. I an devastated, we had miles to go and things to do. It is all gone now.

[onecent]

1. Oh, how my heart goes out to you! I lost my husband last July

suddenly, so the first year anniversary is coming up on the 28th. There are NO WORDS to make things better. There just are not!

People were wonderful, and so many wonderful acts of kindness came my way - still do, actually-- so I can only say my thoughts and prayers are with you. It has made me question my existence. We were together 22 years, the best 22 years of my life. I didn't expect 22 more, my husband was disabled and was 69 when he passed...but I thought I would be taking care of him for a very long time.

Just getting up some days especially the first 6 months...just didn't make sense.
Food doesn't taste.
Flowers don't smell
Laughter just flew out the window for me.

Surround yourself with loved ones! Take a day at a time! Be good to yourself.
And, actually, one of the best pieces of advice I was given....is "Do not make any major decisions for one year". I made a few small ones - they weren't major, but I wish now that I had not made a couple of them. They didn't cause a great deal of upheaval in my life, but I wish I could undo one of them.(you may pm me if you ever wish and I will share with you)

Also, I know this may not be a time to give you a piece of practical advice, but there is not a good time and this should be known by everyone who loses someone close. Make sure you keep at least one account in both of your names. I received a check just this week (stimulus check) in my husband's and my name. Many banks will not cash or accept a check unless the deceased signs on the back or he is listed on an account with the survivor. I learned this through a book I read on grief when I lost my best friend back in the 80's.

I am sending you strength and love to help carry you through this very difficult and sad time.
It sounds like he was a wonderful friend as well as a wonderful husband. You will get through this. He will want you to forge ahead. And he will be waiting for you.

[auntAgonist]

2. yy4me..

I'm so terribly sorry for your loss. I have no words. I don't know how you must feel. I can only imagine. :hug: Please know that you are in my thoughts. May your memories bring you some comfort in the days ahead.
Do you have family close by?

Please keep in touch and vent / cry / 'talk' as much as you feel comfortable doing.

:hug:

kesha.

aka
auntAgonist.

[RevCheesehead]

3. I am so sorry!

What a horrible shock, to have everything happen so suddenly. Of course you're reeling right now... I'd be concerned if you weren't. In time, life will slowly stop spinning around, and you'll find you have your feet planted firmly on the ground.

In the meanwhile, know that I am praying for you. :hug:

Ruth

[livetohike]

4. I'm so very sorry for your loss yy4me

:hug: Please check in here and take good care of yourself.... I hope all of your good memories will give you comfort :hug:.

[CC]

5. I am so sorry and my heart goes out to you.

If you were able to keep it together at this point I would be more worried. You might find yourself feeling crazy for a while yet, but that is normal. Lean on your loved ones, they care and want to help you though they may have no idea how. Sending lots of :hug:s your way and like others said, we may be slow here but someone always comes by to lend a shoulder and an ear.

[yellerpup]

6. I am so very sorry for your great loss.

I will carry you next to my heart today. :hug:

[LongTomH]

7. You'll be in my thoughts, too!

All of us who've known loss will keep you close in our thoughts and prayers.:hug:

[Flying Dream Blues]

8. I'm so very sorry for your loss, yy4me. It must be just a total shock for you in

every way, and just so devastating; he sounds like a wonderful man. I hope you will take good care of yourself during this time, let others help you as much as they can. I haven't lost my spouse (thank God) but my son's death was also very sudden, so I remember the shock phase very well. This is a very caring group, and I have been comforted on several occasions visiting here. Please let us know how you're doing; grief is a journey, and those on it can really help each other along the way. I'm sending hugs and love to you.
:hug:

[Bullwinkle925]

9. I'm sorry . . .

and there really are no words to convey any kind of help to you in a time like this.
I'm having a hard time tonight grieving the loss of my husband.

[yy4me]

10. It is a year today and I doubt if I will ever come to understand

why this happened.

[auntAgonist]

11. It is beyond understanding ..

My heart goes out to you :hug:

:cry: I'm so very sorry for your loss. :cry:

I thought of this ..

When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart, and you shall see that, in truth, you are weeping for that which has been your delight.

Kahlil Gibran

It makes me think that when we think of those we love and have lost we are awakened to the memories that warm our hearts.

I hope that makes sense and that you don't find the quote to be upsetting in any way.

:hug:
I'm thinking of you today ..

kesha

[CrispyQ]

12. I am so sorry for your loss.

My biggest fear is that my husband will exit this planet before I do. I can't imgaine what you have gone through & I can't think of any words that could comfort you. :hug:


"If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you." ~Winnie the Pooh to Piglet