I guess I'm a prude

[Eloriel]

While I use the word "fuck" and variations myself at times (not all that frequently) and "shit" occasionally, I really, really don't like crude and/or sexually explicit language. I've never cared for bathroom humor, either. All of that just offends me. It coursens the dialog, and it cheapens and demeans both the speaker (uh, writer) and the listener (reader).

So why do I have to see so much of this crude and sexually explicit language right here in this Group? Is it for SHOCK value? Is it just the kind of language and the sort of topics the the posters are most familiar and comfortable with -- trashy garbage?

I just don't get it. I've never had women friends who routinely spoke like that -- I've always considered that kind of behavior reserved for coarser males who didn't have much class.

I really don't get it. This Group may be something of a sanctuary, but I see no reason to foul it with that kind of language used with the kind of abandon I've seen it used in the last couple of days.

I JUST don't get it.

[MuseRider]

1. LOL

I am not teasing you but a PRUDE? I have never thought of you like that. In fact, I am thrilled that we have something in common to talk about considering the fights we have had in the candidate wars!

I do speak like that at times. I try not to but fuck is a word I have used a lot more than I wish I had. I draw the line at some of the words used to describe women that are used to keep us down. I have to admit that I now am having to become conscious of the use of words because I have used the words prick, etc. to describe men with abandon before. I now see that I can't demand respect for my sex while speaking of the other sex like that.

I think that if I actually had the writing skills and the wit that you and so many others here have I probably would not speak that way at all.

I have a vision of you from reading all of your posts and getting so mad at you I turn purple because you are soooo good at this. When I read your post right now I was amused, Eloriel? A prude? Never I say.

I do get your point, I am about the same age as you. At some point the language in this country coarsened to the point that this has become acceptable. Is it acceptable? No, probably not but it is common.

[Heddi]

2. Can you give examples?

What do you consider to be "crude and sexually explicit" language?

In a post earlier, I referred to my husband's semen as "spunk". I've referred to fucking, tits, and ass as well.

My reason for this is because, as a nursing student, I'm up to my ears in clinical terms and proper medical terminology.

I would use "spunk" around my friends, but not around patients or other health care professionals. Equally, I use the words I'd use in verbal conversation, which I kind of view discussion boards as, only visual instead of verbal.

Give us some examples. I'm more than willing to amend my language if it's offensive to other people, but if I don't know what's offensive, I can't change.

[Cerridwen]

3. Shock value? Some bit of typing as we speak? Lack of expanded

vocabulary? Spitting fury and rage? All of the above? None of the above? Some combination thereof?

Speaking of two things with which I have experience:

There was a small group within the early women's movement here in the U.S. that used explicit and "vulgar" language for shock value and as a "sign" of breaking free of the societal "norms" of lady-like behavior. Me? I use lots of quotation marks. :D

My other experience is from my own family. My potty mouth comes from my grandfather and my father; both of whom could "swear to make a sailor blush." When my dad passed in 1989, we thought seriously of having the word "fuck" engraved on his headstone; he had used it during life about once every three words. I have to work at not using such language when at work and when posting to the boards. I have varying degrees of success.

:o

[all.of.me]

5. i agree with the breaking free from societal norms

it's like scratching in public - what makes it unacceptable for a woman to do it?! same with swearing, i guess. why not? men do.

i have a horrible potty mouth, but as a writer, i don't use it at all. i write MUCH differently than i speak!

[noamnety]

4. I have a bit of a gutter mouth

I don't think I've used it here much, I doubt I'm the offender ... but it's not beyond the realm of possibility. Only gal in an all male army unit ... I learned some bad habits.

[Kathy in Cambridge]

6. I swear quite a bit

:blush:

The 'F-word' is an adjective here in Boston.

[Solly Mack]

7. I've never thought there was a gender monopoly on cursing

Women curse.

I've cursed fluently since age 4. Got well paid for it too. Neighbor enjoyed shocking my mother that way.

Certain vulgarities cause my nose to crinkle though. More in how they are used and what their intent is than anything.

That said, sometimes it's necessary to drive a point home to put it in the crudest form possible.

I don't buy into the intelligent people don't curse myth either. Intelligent people do curse.

However, not everyone knows how to curse.

[undergroundpanther]

8. I cuss because I chose to

Some words express it better,Sure I can get creative,but creative doesn't cut it sometimes when it comes to saying how I feel.

If you make the word fuck into a bogey word and invest it with the power to offend and shock more than other words do it is guaranteed to do that regardless of why I say it.
You like me also make a choice. But it's about your offensiveness .To give my words about my own feelings power to offend you personally.I don't have the power to do that to anyone...Maybe you have projected more of what is in your head into the word fuck and this gave it power it does not deserve that I didn't put there.

Saying fuck is not a personal attack on you, as I mean it it is usually a descriptive adjective.No cussing here I have wrote has intended to hurt ,however it has expressed how my hurt feels to me.
Why does my feelings and my expression of pain offend you unless somewhere you take it personally in a reaction to a word you somehow invested with too much power charged with an intent that is not there in me? Where did your reaction come from?
Just asking.

[Solly Mack]

10. You must be addressing this to the OP

Hi, I'm Solly Mack. Fuck is my swear word of choice.

[Hello_Kitty]

9. Distaste for profanity doesn't make you a prude

It's just your personal taste. I use profanity myself, in speaking and online, but I'm trying to curb it because it can make a person sound ignorant and as though they lack a vocabulary. Sometimes though, it's really effective when you want to get a point across forcefully. That's why I'm trying to use it sparingly.