Reply #3: This... is some funny shit [View All]

[MrScorpio]

The “Vinegar Boy” Saga, as told by Aaron
Last update: 06-10-2004
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Thursday, April 3

This is what happens when I swap work hours with the day shift - I get all their weirdoes!

About 2 pm today, in stormed this woman who started going totally apeshit on me and screamed incoherently while waving around a half-full bottle of malt vinegar.

I had no idea what she was on about and, before I could find out, the police arrived - but I hadn't called them!

Now, I know nearly every cop within fifty miles of my site (I call them all often enough), so when they come in, I greet them by name and they do the same back and tell me they've been called here because of allegations I've poisoned a small child.

Wuh?

The crazy lady identifies herself as the kid's parent and told them I poisoned her lad. To avoid describing twenty minutes of ranting and gibbering on the woman's part, I'll cut right to the chase.

I had sold a 1L bottle of malt vinegar to a kid (about fifteen years old) that morning and he had taken the bottle home and drunk half of it - yes that's right, he had drunk vinegar. Of course, he got sick as a dog and "redecorated" the walls and floor of several rooms.



At this point the cops and I exchanged looks and one said, "Damn Aaron, and we all thought you had finally snapped." Ha ha. There's always a comedian.

The woman demanded that I be arrested, but the police weren't buying it now that they knew the situation. She eventually relented on her demands that I be thrown in jail, but demanded an apology from me for "failing to tell her son not to drink vinegar."

I said, "I don't tell people not to stick the fuel nozzle up their nose and fill their brainpan with diesel either. And do you know why? Because most people aren't that stupid!"

End result: I refuse to apologize, and stand firm by my statements that her child is a moron. She demands apology, threatens to sue for slander, and promises to return tomorrow when the manager is here.

And I thought the loons only came out after dark

I'm curious to see what sort of reaction she'll get from my half-wit manager if she comes back. But knowing him, he'll probably apologize to her, and make a new rule that all staff will have to tell people not to chug-a-lug vinegar