Would you pass up something you love for someone you love? [View All]

[Xithras]

OK, here's my dilemma. When I was younger I did a lot of mountain climbing with my sister. Nothing too insane mind you, mostly class 1-4 stuff (you can walk up a class 1 with your hands in your pockets, and a class 4 just means that you need a rope, but still nothing vertical). We both quit doing it about 10 years ago when she got married and started having kids. Despite the interruption, neither of us gave up our love for mountain climbing, and there were certain mountains that we always said we'd climb "one of these days"...Mt. Shasta, Mt. Lyell, Mt. Whitney, Mt. Hood.

Last weekend my sister came over to my house, and she announced to me that she was going to climb Shasta in 2008, and that I needed to get my butt into shape again so she'd have someone to climb with. I was elated. I pulled our old climbing equipment down from the rafters, we started talking about the acclimatization and practice climbs that we should start on next spring, and basically got 100% gung-ho on the idea. Then my wife found out.

My wife has never been a huge outdoors person, and has never climbed a mountain in her life. She immediately put her foot down and insisted that climbing mountains was "too dangerous" for a married parent. When I pointed out that our practice runs would be on tame class 1 and 2 mountains, and that we're both experienced climbers, she switched to a general "I just don't want you to do it". When I pressed her to find out why (thinking that I could allay her concerns) she shot back with an "If you love me, you won't ever ask me about this again."

WTF?

So here's the question. Would you give up doing something you really love doing, simply because the person you love doesn't want you to do it anymore? I never intended that my break from climbing would be permanent, and I've mentioned countless times over the years that I planned on climbing again someday. I was caught off guard by her reaction and am really torn on how to proceed with this. I love her very much, and she'll be pissed to no end if I press the issue. On the other hand, climbing is one of the great loves of my life and is something that I've done since I was a teenager. Heck, I was planning on introducing my 13 year old daughter to the sport in a couple more years.