Reply #32: Here's another. [View All]

[IntravenousDemilo]

TRIPLETS, by Howard Dietz and Arthur Schwartz, from Louisiana Hayride and later, the film The Bandwagon

The "Triplets" are Nanette Fabray, Jack Buchanan and Fred Astaire.

ALL
Three little unexpected children, simultaneously
The doctor brought us, and you can see
That we'll be three forever and a-e-i-o...
You wouldn't know how agonizing being triple can be.
Each one is individually
The victim of the clinical day e-i-o...
Every summer we go away to Baden Baden Baden.
Every winter we come back home to Walla Walla Walla.

We do everything alike.
We look alike.
We dress alike, we walk alike
We talk alike,
And what is more,
We hate each other very much.
We hate our folks.
We're sick of jokes on what an art
It is to tell us apart!

FRED
If one of us gets the measles,

JACK
Another one gets the measles,

ALL
Then all of us get the measles
And mumps and croup.
How I wish I had a gun,
A widdle gun.
It would be fun to shoot the other two
And be only one.

FRED
Mrs Whipplepoofer loves to talk to Mrs Hildendorfer
Of the fatal natal day she had her silly Willy.

NANETTE
Mrs Hudson-Cooper loves to talk to Mrs Goldenwasser
Of her major operations when she had her twins.

JACK
But when mother comes along, she silences the others.
She accomplished something that is very rare in mothers.

ALL
MGM has got a Leo,
But Mama has got a trio.
She is proud but says three is a crowd.

We do everything alike.
We look alike.
We dress alike, we walk alike
We talk alike,
And what is more,
We hate each other very much.
We hate our folks.
We're sick of jokes on what an art
It is to tell us apart!

We eat the same kind of vittles.
We drink the same kind of bottles.
We sit in the same kind of high-chair.
High-chair, high-chair!

How I wish I had a gun,
A widdle gun.
It would be fun to shoot the other two
And be only one!