GOP SEEKS RETURN TO SLAVERY

[Don Davis]

GOP leaders have indicated that they intend to drop their proposed Constitutional Amendments banning "flag burning" and "gay marriage." Instead, in a desperate attempt to dangle the ultimate "red meat" before their base, they plan to seek the abolition of the 13th Amendment, and actually bring back slavery.

As House Speaker Dennis Hastert said, "we're not getting much of the black vote anyway, what have we got to lose?"

In order to give this plan a realistic chance to pass legal muster, the Republicans are pushing Roger B. Taney -- author of the infamous Dred Scott decision that helped precipitate the Civil War -- for the next opening on the Supreme Court.

Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist cited Taney's top-flight credentials as a former Chief Justice, and his strong commitment to states' rights. When confronted with the fact that Taney has been dead for almost 150 years, Frist replied: "What's the difference, Clarence Thomas doesn't ask any questions from the Bench either."

"Besides," Frist added, "how can you be so sure he's really dead?"

Some GOP moderates are concerned, however, that reimposing slavery may send the wrong signal, especially in view of current U.S. efforts to liberalize the Arab world. Consequently, as an alternative, they're willing to settle for a return to the "separate but equal" doctrine of Plessy v. Ferguson.

When asked about her position on this potential "compromise" proposal, Senator Hillary Clinton stated that she was reserving judgment on the matter, particularly since she thought "separate but equal" worked out just fine in her own marriage.

[liberal N proud]

1. Do you have a link?

Welcome do DU Don

[Don Davis]

4. Here's my link:

http://satiricalpolitical.com (I actually reference it in all my posts.)

And thank for the kind comments.

[The_Casual_Observer]

2. I'll bet that if you did a poll about the 13th amendment

30% of the people would be in favor of abolition.

[Virginia Dare]

3. What do you think all of those Halliburton prisons are for...

back to the Gulag, baby!

[azurnoir]

5. In a way it

is already happening. State prisons have come up with a way to make money, they "rent" out prisoner's for farm labor. So now if a "patriotic" farmers don't want to hire illegals they only have to call the local dept of corrections who will supply prisoner's and guards for a fee. Of course the prisoner's have to pay for their room and board and that comes out of their pay, but given the racial make-up of prisons what you have is men (mostly black) doing forced labor under gun point for large scale farmers.
My we've come a long way baby.

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

6. Welcome to DU!

I have voted to recommend this for the Greatest Page-great satire!

[Don Davis]

7. Mucho Thanks!

[zbdent]

8. GOP would not advocate a return to slavery

Slavery means that you would take care of your property. And that nobody else can abuse your property.

"Ownership" would mean having to provide a minimum of health care . . . and that costs money.

What they want is people bidding for jobs . . . in the same way that government contracts are bid . . . low bidder gets the contract.

Kinda like the hot new toys for Christmas . . . low supply of jobs/toys creates high demand . . . and people willing to do anything for it . . .

[Demeter]

9. Such a Benevolent View of Slaveowners

Tell me, where can I find such an arrangement? I have no health benefits, no overtime, no pension, and no security.....

[zbdent]

11. Benevolent? hah.

The horse gets better medical treatment than the slave.

However, the owner paid good money for the slave. If the slave is sick or injured, it's money out of the owner's pocket. So it's not benevolence . . . the slave got NO paycheck . . . period . . . a non-slave worker got wages . . .

I don't know how you got the idea that I was advocating slavery . . . I was pointing out that the a point about the abolishment of slavery which lent itself to having even less of an investment in caring for human beings that before.

[ladjf]

10. To a large degree, slavery has already returned in a somewhat

modified form.

[Montauk6]

12. Hmmm... MMMMMM... I smell "onion"

[EFerrari]

13. Bill Frist needs to stop watching so much video.

:)

Welcome to DU. That's hilarious.