BUSH: I'LL ATTACH SIGNING STATEMENT TO SIGNING STATEMENT LEGISLATION

[Don Davis]

As reported, Senator Arlen Specter has introduced legislation that would authorize Congress to bring lawsuits to challenge the constitutionality of President Bush’s “signing statements,” which the President has frequently used to evade laws passed by Congress.

Indeed, the number of such signing statements, in excess of 800, is actually greater than the number of Iraqi troops who are ready to “stand up.”

However, in the event such legislation is approved by Congress, President Bush has indicated that he will in fact sign it, but only with its own signing statement. An unnamed White House source suggested that such statement is likely to be “Fuck you, this legislation is not worth the paper it’s printed on, or even a coupon for frequent flier miles to Fallujah.”

The same high-ranking official defended the use of signing statements, stating that Bush actually used them even prior to becoming President, when he signed his “commitment” to serve in the Texas National Guard.

Indeed, the President is reputed to have issued a signing statement in his very first official act as President, when he took the oath of office and swore to uphold the Constitution.

Bush also claimed that he shouldn’t be held accountable for these signing statements, since “they’re really a sign from God.”

Finally, White House Press Secretary Tony Snow stated that at any Rose Garden ceremony enacting such legislation, President Bush plans to have a person “signing” for the deaf, who will simply flash the “middle finger salute.”

[acmavm]

1. Those 'statements' are written in well thought out terms and

are composed of good sentence structure and correctly phrased wording. Who writes those things for him do you think?

By 'well thought out terms', I mean as well thought out as any criminally minded left-brained asshole can squeeze out a thought pattern.

[Monkeyman]

3. Karen Hughes

[whistle]

2. What a defiant arrogant fu*k-head

[Demit]

6. You do realize this is a satire, right?

Your post is true anyway, but the OP is not an editorial, it's original satire.

[whistle]

8. Oh, well Bush is still a defiant arrogant fu*k-head

:yoiks:

[eShirl]

15. when the real news reads like satire

satire reads like the real news

[rodeodance]

4. what a little minded smartypants!

[rodeodance]

5. next time I will read beyond the subject line!

[AndyA]

7. Sarcasm - and very clever!

:sarcasm:

Don't get your panties in a wad, folks.

[Totallybushed]

9. delete

[wryter2000]

10. Well done

I thought I was reading the Onion. :applause:

[Don Davis]

11. Great thanks.

Great thanks.

[lindisfarne]

12. It seems to me signing statements are meaningless. A law is a law -

of course, the exact interpretation of the law can sometimes be difficult. But the law doesn't cease to have force simply because someone says "I choose to interpret the law in a way no one else would, or I choose to limit the law to X". It doesn't work for me, and it doesn't work for anyone else, including the president.

[grannylib]

13. *lol* Well done. God knows he has ignored his oath of office just as he's

ignored any law he doesn't want to follow, and has trashed the Constitution...

[NMDemDist2]

14. welcome to DU Don Davis

:hi:

[Turn CO Blue]

16. Welcome to DU! Nicely done, too. n/t

[KoKo]

17. Well done! If only folks would read past "Subject Line," more would

get the sarcasm...but truthfully the news out of BushKingdom is often so bizarre that we are almost primed to believe anything no matter how outrageous about these folks.

:D a good one, though.