Salon: The mind-numbing stupidity of the Royal Wedding (Our Serf Mentality)

[TalkingDog]

http://www.salon.com/entertainment/tv/2011/04/29/william_and_kate_tv_coverage

"It really is something special," anchor Diane Sawyer said on ABC a few minutes after their first public kiss. Then she added a few minutes later, in a rundown of factoids, "He knows how to line dance!"

The moment capped hours of continuous coverage on every major broadcast network and cable news channel. The news organizations never cut away except for commercials. And they managed to forgo those breaks when it seemed as if something exciting, or "exciting," was about to happen -- such as the newly-hitched royal couple's first kiss, which was so brief that the TV organizations played it back in slow motion, and their second kiss, which presumably was an attempt to improve on the first one.

"I'm a hard-hearted old cynic, but I must admit I did shed a tear," said ABC's Buckingham Palace correspondent Nick Watt, who then stopped just short of taking credit for the chant in the crowd that pushed William and Kate to kiss a second time. "I'd like to think I played a small part in that," Watt said, beaming.

I wish the royal couple the very best. They seem like nice people, truly. Fellow human beings, at the very least. And that's why I hope that when in the unlikely event that they ever read this, that they won't take it personally when I say that the coverage of this whole ceremony and its run-up was revoltingly obsequious and almost entirely devoid of news value, and so altogether bubble-brained that it makes me think that if there is such a thing as karmic payback for wrong priorities, we're due for some major trauma.

[Dawson Leery]

1. kick

[Keith Bee]

26. and rec

Fuck the pampered layabouts!

[bjobotts]

35. Look how friviolous our news media has become. Corporate amusement

[pacalo]

2. There's nothing wrong with wanting to watch it. William's mother Diana was a great

humanitarian & it's natural for many to have interest in seeing her son get married.

On the other hand, for a media that hasn't focused on what's really important, what really affects our lives in very negative ways for over a decade, I heartily agree that too much has been hyped about the wedding.

I hadn't been following the coverage at all until the wedding. In fact, I know very little about Kate at this point. And I stayed up all night to watch it live. I thoroughly enjoyed it, but that's where it ends.

[tblue37]

5. I liked seeing the bride's 2 gowns, and also looking at and laughing at the

silly, silly hats, so I have looked at photos from the event, but I didn't actually watch it, nor have I read anything about it.

But then again, I have very little patience for long, boring elaborate ceremonies. I skipped the graduation ceremonies for all three of my degrees, and I made sure my own wedding was short, simple, and sparsely populated back in 1970. If I couldn't get interested in a drawn-out ceremony for myself, I could never get that interested in someone else's wedding!

[pacalo]

9. My eyes were like a fish's out of water when I saw some of those hats!

But I pretty much watched through the eyes of Diana. I noticed that William had the same charming, demure facial expressions as his mother did at different moments during the ceremony. But Harry is the cuter one, imo. He's adorable.

I thought Kate's sister was the most stunning -- I loved her dress.

I didn't want a wedding, either! I just wanted a fast, simple "procedure" with the justice of the peace. My dad gave us the money he would have spent on a wedding, which helped us a lot more than spending it on a ceremony. For those who dream of having a wedding, I understand the desire to have one. It just wasn't for me.

[tblue37]

13. My clever, funny son (he is 31 now) said a couple of years ago

that he was appalled at the way women will spend (or have their families spend) thousands of dollars to throw a party where theyc an be the center of attention while everyone watches them dress up like a princess.

He said, "When I was a little boy, I dreamed of growing up to be a ninja. Imagine if I spent thousands of dollars to throw a party where everyone I know could come and watch me dress up like a ninja to be the center of attention for several horus. They would think I was ridiculous and in need of help!"

[pnwmom]

16. Imagine if you spent thousands of dollars to put on

a professional football game where everyone could come and watch the players knock each others brains out, trying to move a stuffed pigskin down a field. Wouldn't you and everyone else involved be ridiculous and in need of help?

[tblue37]

24. Oh, I think so! I cannot get behind the spectacle of spectator sports--

especially the idea that they are billion-dollar industries, and the athletes are paid such ridiculous salaries for playing a silly game.

[Citizen Worker]

25. I once said to a friend as we were watching a NASCAR race on the TV, "look at that crowd. Wouldn't

it be something if we could get that many people to a Union meeting?"

[Orrex]

3. I think it's nice to see the US media devoting so much air time to welfare recipients

When else do we get to see such loving coverage of people suckling at the public teat?

[MrModerate]

6. Outside of security and an allowance or two, the royals are . . .

A largely self-funded tourist magnet. I mean, "merrie olde England" with actual princes and pricesses running around? The wedding is a touristic triumph, which will pay for itsef tens of times over.

[Orrex]

7. Meh

Doesn't do shit for the US, yet it's wall-to-wall coverage all over the media. I don't even have cable, and even I can't escape the onslaught.

I find the whole concept of monarchy absurd and offensive. I recognize that it's a beloved tradition in much of the world, but it's an anachronism that should be allowed to stay in the past.

[MrModerate]

10. Even without cable, I'm sure there's plenty to watch.

You could also take a walk, read a book, or compose a passionate posting on DU. And I have to say, it's pretty mingy of you to complain about another country's festive traditions. Everybody loves a fairy tale.

Well, not everybody, apparently.

The media are covering it because they think there's an audience. If they're wrong, they'll take a big hit, because their advertisers will whack 'em, hard. For that matter, this is not the only time there's been "wall to wall" coverage of events that you or I might have zero interest in watching -- New Years' celebrations come to mind.

[Orrex]

12. Don't get me wrong--I think that a lot of the US' "festive traditions" are bullshit, too

I simply don't see the value in such vapid and (again) anachronistic pageantry. Dollar value, perhaps, but beyond that? Meh.

[MrModerate]

15. Well, if you want to separate the valid from the vapid . . .

In popular culture, you're going to have a very depressing weekend.

[Orrex]

18. Believe me, I'll attack with equal vigor every over-hyped royal wedding I hear about this weekend

Ultimately, beyond the weirdly retrograde worship of a feudalistic societal structure, what most irritates me is the zeal with which the media have thrown themselves into the coverage of this wedding, which stands in stark contrast to the anemic coverage of any truly substantive event in the world. Even I, who have avoided the wedding, can readily find out everything about it, down to The Bride's royal shoe size and how long her train was.

This creepy fetishism--this drive to prostrate oneself before "royalty"--makes no sense to me.


Honestly, the fact that it makes sense to anybody makes no sense to me. Can someone explain it?

[MrModerate]

21. Well, I have two answers . . .

I think the media is attracted to the fairytale aspect I alluded to earlier. Kate and Whoozits are an attractive young couple, wouldn't seem out of place in a Disney movie (he'd need a hairpiece), the pageantry was done to the max, it was . . . fun. And miles away from all the trials and tribulations of real life, while at the same time seeming to be a piece of real life. It was popular for the same reason that romantic comedies are popular -- everyone can project themselves into the situation and derive pleasure.

And I didn't see much prostrating. By report, Londoners were undewhelmed by the magnificence of it all. And no one is required to take the royals seriously: they're just the hereditary heads of the UK's hospitality industry (and rich as Croesus, which adds a whole other level of interest). The UK embraces them for the same reasons tweens embrace Justin Bieber -- because it's so magical (for them), while at the same time being entirely safe.

[Orrex]

30. 2.5 responses

I simply don't get the "fairy tale" aspect, unless we're talking about the one where the prince marries the well-off woman. Popular romantic comedies are on a whole different level because no one believes that they're real.

I can't speak to how the Londoners responded to the event, but the "prostrating" that I'm referring to is the very round-the-clock lovefest that we've been seeing in American culture. What could possibly be more irrelevant to an American citizen than who is going to be the next hereditary figurehead in another country?


As you note, it's no different from fawning over Justin Bieber or Paris Hilton or whoever; any form of celebrity worship is preposterous, all the more so if it hearkens back to the grand old days of feudalism.

[MrModerate]

37. Whoa nellie. That response is like looking at an old-fashioned pinball machine:

Fun to watch but hard to follow.

In the fairytale, William is the prince (typecasting) and Kate is the appealing maiden (whether she's well funded or not doesn't come into the picture). The fact that she's only maiden-ish is also not a problem, because today "nice girls" (the type you'd take home to the Queen) are not required to be shy virgins.

And I think your opinion about romantic comedies is 180 degrees off the mark: they're appealing only to the degree that the audience believes they could happen. Every couple has a story about how they "met cute" (or imagines one), and romantic comedies merely take the met cute up a notch or seven.

For "prostrating," I'd substitute "buzzing" as in buzzing around the honey hoping for a taste, and commenting to all the other buzzers how things are going. It's no more dignified than prostration, but I wouldn't call it feudal. I'm sure that Ogg the caveman paid rapt attention when the chieftan's daughter came into heat and announced her availability to the local males.

Preposterous? Yes. But humans are a preposterous species.

[pnwmom]

17. We have wall to wall coverage of other people playing sports all year around.

This kind of wedding happens every 30 years or so. Different strokes for different folks, but I know which takes up more media time -- and it's not an occasional wedding.

[Orrex]

19. Really?

I'm having trouble recalling the last sporting event that completely dominated all of the major networks for hours on end.

Unless you count the OJ Simpson car chase, of course, in which case I agree with you that it was a sickeningly stupid waste of time.

[pnwmom]

23. Not one particular sporting event, but daily sporting events for years on end.

None of which mean anything to me -- but I don't criticize those who do enjoy watching them.

[Bluenorthwest]

28. The sporting events, being products, are 'owned' by one network

So the Olympics only take over one network, for weeks on end. Same for the 'super' bowl or the 'world' series. These are events that would not happen except for the money they generate. They are entertainments, made for entertainment, bought and sold as such. A 'superbowl' is like a Beiber concert, it would not exist if not for the fans shoving money at it.

[neoralme]

34. Excellent posts you're making, Orrex. I don't watch tv, but I saw some

of the garish opulence on the internet. For me, it is simply disgusting. However, despite this, I did have a lot of respect for Diana, or at least that which she appeared to me.

[my2sense]

4. K & R

[provis99]

8. Matt Taibbi called it the peasant mentality.

The willingness to grovel at the feet of the feudal overlords, despite the apparent uselessness of said overlords.
http://trueslant.com/matttaibbi/2009/04/14/americas-peasant-mentality/

[TalkingDog]

11. Thanks for the link.

n/t

[Hugin]

39. To be honest Taibbi was talking about Wall Street.

Not Buckingham Palace.

[pnwmom]

14. Mind-numbingly stupid things are different for everybody.

Mine include:

football
baseball
wrestling
almost any "reality show"


But I like weddings and silly hats. And I don't see how watching the wedding was any worse than any other entertainment you could watch on TV. Plus, I only watch TV weddings about every 30 years. I've spent a lot less time on that than most people do watching millionaire professional sports players. And I don't read people here criticizing them.

[Orrex]

20. Actually, people criticize sports-fetishism all the time on DU

If you're willing to lump the wedding in with the other pointless "reality" shows, then I guess I'm okay with that.

However, the problem isn't that people are watching a pointless spectacle involving fabulously wealthy elites; the problem is that these particular elites belong explicitly to the "ruling" class. There are objectionable elements to the culture of sports-worship, to be sure, but these don't include the conceit that a certain anointed bloodline carries some inherent "royal" trait that should be lauded by the serfs and peons.

[pnwmom]

22. I, like a lot of women, am a sop for weddings.

And I felt sorry for these two boys when they lost their mother. So I enjoyed watching one of them grow up, find his love, and get married. Not because I'm a monarchist but because I'm a sentimental sop. You're reading way too much into this.

[Bluenorthwest]

29. The world is smaller than many here think....

nt

[Orrex]

31. We all read to the depth that seems fitting to us

:shrug:

[mountainlion55]

27. And the serfs

trembled in adulation. :wtf:

[madmom]

32. I only wished...

I had the choice to NOT watch it. I say the same thing about sports..why have them on regular channels when we have channels regulated to sports, and I will NOT watch a reality show, because let's face it..it's not reality.

[neoralme]

33. Don't watch tv. Not interested in gratuitous oppulence. I'm sure

the severe-looking Kate and her balding husband will have productive lives being tended to my servants who will make their beds, dress them, bring them the paper and ice cream at night while they're bathing in Evian.

[Ninjaneer]

36. K&R x 100000

[bhikkhu]

38. I didn't watch it, but I would consider it an innocent pleasure for many

...just to enjoy as a bit of pomp and history, and a harmless and pretty ceremony at the center of an old culture. I would think of it like the parades we have on occasions down the main street of our town - everybody comes to see the floats and marching bands and so forth. One could be snide and hateful about what its not, and one can always deride the quality of people who are enjoying themselves, but then one could also just relax in the moment and be a part.

There is a strain in people, sometimes, that hates innocence and naivete, and that forces people apart to divide and defend themselves. It helps nothing and leads nowhere.

[Hugin]

40. By watching it simulcast, I was spared the corporatism of the event.

If you, like me, had gotten up at an ungawdly early hour and watched it on the BBC-America you would have been spared the commercial overload. There were none and the commentary was held to an absolute minimum.