Does God Hate Shrimp?

[Taylor Mason Powell]

Yes. God hates shrimp.

www.godhatesshrimp.com


Leviticus 11:9-12 says:
9 These shall ye eat of all that are in the waters: whatsoever hath fins and scales in the waters, in the seas, and in the rivers, them shall ye eat.
10 And all that have not fins and scales in the seas, and in the rivers, of all that move in the waters, and of any living thing which is in the waters, they shall be an abomination unto you:
11 They shall be even an abomination unto you; ye shall not eat of their flesh, but ye shall have their carcases in abomination.
12 Whatsoever hath no fins nor scales in the waters, that shall be an abomination unto you.

[Generator]

1. Don't even mention lobster

he'll bring on a plague of frogs.

[Taylor Mason Powell]

3. I'm gonna go picket the Long John Silver's.

If God used the same word to describe shrimp as he did to describe homosexuality, well then, shrimp must be just as bad in God's eyes.

[No2W2004]

2. Heh, great site!

even crayfish?

[Taylor Mason Powell]

4. ESPECIALLY Crayfish.

And "Crawfish" as well, which may or may not be the same thing, I'm not sure. Don't try to weasel out of this on a technicality, sinner!!

:-)

EDIT: Yes, they are the same thing. Also, "Crawdads."

[No2W2004]

6. Darn!

So what am I gonna do with all this crawfish bisque?

[Taylor Mason Powell]

9. Mmmmm, crawfish bisque....

give it to me!! I'm already an abomination six ways from Sunday!

[K-W]

5. Gotta love health codes mixed with edicts from god.

If the relgious right had thier way, this would be how the US constitution would be written to.

[Raster]

7. and how many of the fundies had shrimp today???????

All part of the "pick and choose" method of christian dogma. Use the parts you like, jettison the parts you don't. If it suits you purpose, embrace it. If not, just fugetaboudit.

Gawd supposedly also said pork was an abomination. I bet ol' Jerry Falwell had bacon this morning. He probably even had shrimp with lobster sauce. He is a bad, bad, evil man.

Also, according to leviticus, you aren't supposed to wear clothing of mixed fibers. Oh, oh, better call the religious fiber police.

[BlueStateGirl]

12. God hates Poly-Cotton Blends?

Damn.

No wonder the 70's sucked.

[Taylor Mason Powell]

16. LOL!

Great insight! I think you've just proved the existence of God!

[aquart]

8. God wasn't thinking of shrimp.

The Goddess was thinking of her sacred dolphin.

The only injunctions against eating have to do with sacred rituals, with taboos. You can't eat your totem animal.

[Taylor Mason Powell]

11. Well, in addition...

some of the Kosher laws had to do with preventing cruelty to animals. Hence the edict that in order for its meat to be kosher, a cow must be killed in such a way as not to feel pain.

[Scairp]

10. What about crab?

I just love going to Crabby Bob's and pigging out on a bucket of crab legs. And who doesn't love crabcakes?

[Taylor Mason Powell]

13. Nope!

God, that's who!! God HATES crabcakes.

It's all right there in Leviticus.

[BlueStateGirl]

14. God. God doesn't love Crab Cakes.

[kodi]

15. actually, god has a high uric acid/blood level & shellfish give god gout

and as anyone who has ever had an attack of it can attest, you certainly curse that which brings on an attack of it.