I would be a Republican if...

[coloradodem2005]

...I was alive in the 1860's. Or maybe in the 1900's when Teddy was President.

[Gato Moteado]

1. i didn't have a single functioning braincell.

[Racenut20]

3. ya beat me to it

[LosinIt]

2. monkeys flew out of my butt

[gator_in_Ontario]

4. pigs find themselves

in need of air traffic control....

[Manix]

5. ..not as long as I am still breathing!

[porphyrian]

6. ...I lacked all compassion for anyone I didn't idolize. - n/t

[porphyrian]

9. ...I was so enthralled by religious dogma as to disbelieve facts. - n/t

[porphyrian]

10. ...in my mind, money was second only to the power it brings. - n/t

[chiburb]

7. I was on Prozac and didn't realize how bad things are...

Oh. Maybe THAT is whats wrong with this country?

[Ganja Ninja]

8. I had sold my eternal soul to Satan in exchange for a ....

media career with FOX.

[Name removed]

11. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[newyawker99]

18. Hi Danj!!

Welcome to DU!! :toast:

[Kid_A]

12. I hated dark people.

[Sweetpea]

13. If Elvis came back and kissed me.

[Lex]

14. I lost about 30+ IQ points somehow. n/t

.

[LuminousX]

15. my heart was filled with hate.

[blindpig]

16. If I had a lobotomy and my soul ripped out by demons n/t

[tom_paine]

17. In other words, you would have been a Republican when they were Democrats

And the Democrats were Dixiecrat Republicans, in today's terms.

Yes, I might have been a Republican then.

[librechik]

19. if I had a dick and it was on my neck instead of a head n/t

[LiberalTechie1337]

20. if I claimed to love America, but...

opposed the freedoms and diversity that makes America great.