Feds bust 35 terrorists in Iowa!!! . . . um, sorta

[Bucky]

http://www.omaha.com/toolbox/story_printer.php?u_id=1151795&u_brow=Internet+Explorer&u_ver=6

DES MOINES (AP) - Federal prosecutors claim they built 35 terrorism-related cases in Iowa in the two years after the Sept. 11, 2001 attacks, but most of the defendants have questionable links to violent extremism.

Included among the 35 cases were:

• Four American-born laborers who omitted mention of prior drug convictions or other crimes when they were assigned by a contractor to a runway construction project at the Des Moines airport or when they applied for manual-labor jobs there.

• Five Mexican citizens who stole cans of baby formula from store shelves throughout Iowa and sold them to a man of Arab descent for later resale.

• Two Pakistani men who entered into or solicited sham marriages so that they and their friends could continue to live in the Waterloo area and work at convenience stores there.

The Iowa arrests were part of a national compilation of statistics by the U.S. Department of Justice to lobby Congress.

Lumping minor crimes under the terrorism label could wrongly heighten public anxiety and provide a questionable rationale for more anti-terror resources, critics say.

Jeezus H. Hockeystick! These terrorists really burn my britches! Sham marriages! Baby food!! Construction jobs!!! Is nothing sacred?

[sbj405]

1. What would we do without the PATRIOT ACT?

Oh wait, Des Moines would have a new runway. Some kids would have some baby formula and there'd be a nice Pakistani guy behind the counter when I went to get my Big Gulp. The horrors. Oh, I feel so much safer.

Of course, you realize the vast majority of the people only hear the "35 terrorists" part.

[Bucky]

2. Sigh. Why do you hate America?

with apologies to Mr Tomorrow's penguin

[olddem43]

3. One of my friends was an Iraqi who deserted their army during

Gulf War I, and eventually made his way here. He disappeared a couple of years ago. I guess I could be a suspect too, for talking to him, being that he was from Iraq and all. I don't know - wait, someone's at the door, uh .......