Bush debates you'd like to see.

[Purrfessor]

OK, here's my choice:

George W. Bush vs.


Patrick Star

Using actual quotes, I suspect the dialogue might go something like this:

Bush: I'm honored to shake the hand of a brave Iraqi citizen who had his hand cut off by Saddam Hussein.

Patrick: Is mayonaise an instrument?

Bush: I was a prisoner too, but for bad reasons.

Patrick: Hmm... Let's get naked!

Bush: The best way to find these terrorists who hide in holes is to get people coming forth to describe the location of the hole, is to give clues and data.

Patrick: I want to defeat the giant monkeyman and save the ninth dimension!!!

Bush: And so, in my State of the — my State of the Union — or state — my speech to the nation, whatever you want to call it, speech to the nation — I asked Americans to give 4,000 years — 4,000 hours over the next — the rest of your life — of service to America. That's what I asked — 4,000 hours.

Patrick: I cannot believe what I'm hearing!

Bush: There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again.

Patrick: Texas is dumb?

[Sabriel]

1. Seriously? How about Bush v. Howard Zinn or Greg Palast

How about Bush v. Just About Anyone Who Can Put Two Words Together without a Teleprompter? And that includes my two year old.

[GiovanniC]

2. I'll Debate Him!

Bush, you just name the time and the place. We'll do it on Fox News and I'll let Bill O'Reilly moderate. I will still make you go home crying for your mommy. If you won't debate me, I think it just proves to everyone that you're afraid of me.

[Fleshdancer]

3. Bush vs my four year old daughter

Unlike the media, my daughter is fond of asking the question "why?" over and over again until she gets the answer.

[LiberalTechie1337]

4. Bush vs Carville

BRING IT ON!!!!

[DemWitch]

5. My Mom...

because when I was a kid and did something stupid, and my only answer to "why did you do that" was "because" wasn't acceptable. She would grill me for hours till she got a real and truthful answer. Picture that... My Mom, BushCo. on a stage and her grilling him for three hours... "George, that's not an answer to my question, now you will sit there until you tell me the truth... and don't give me that look..."

[greekspeak]

6. Two I would like to see

1) Shrub vs. the Jesus of the New Testament: Jesus would be called a lowlife hippie scum and the doe-eyed, fawning Stepford Sycophants would wet themselves silly over being in the same room with ShrubGod.

2) Shrub vs. a turnip: The turnip would win, and then commentators from FAUX to PBS would call the turnip a "Bush Basher."

"Truth is sometimes stranger than fiction," they say.