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itzamirakul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 10:42 PM
Original message
Have YOU ever been on the receiving end of bigotry?
In another thread in this forum one of our fellow DUers feels that as Democrats, we should not stoop to the level of the Freepers who gloat and celebrate over the death or misfortune of any Democrat, especially one that we regard highly. Our friend feels that it is not proper to speak disparagingly about a dead Republican because that makes us Democrats as bad as the dittoheads, and in addition, it hurts the innocent families and friends of the deceased.

First, I think our continually taking the "high road" instead of getting down in the gutter and doing some real switchblade slashing is what lost us this presidential election. The Republicans stay in the gutter and cut us off at the knees constantly while we play Pollyanna and keep looking vainly for the day that they will "play fair." They could give a damn less how badly they hurt us or our families and friends in ANY situation. So when I gloat over a loss or problem that they may be having, what the hell do I care if I seem to be "as bad as they are?"

Second, if you have never been on the receiving end of bigotry, and have never experienced the pain and/or humilitation or sometimes just plain helplessness caused by this perverted behavior then how can you possibly tell those who HAVE been there how they should behave when the perpetrator of said bigotry meets his timely or untimely end? A lot of people gloat simply because they managed to "outlive" their tormentor.
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Liberal Veteran Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 10:44 PM
Response to Original message
1. As a gay man....You bet I have.
And I am really starting to think the passive "nicey-nice" walking on eggshells approach is hurting the party and the progressive movement.

They tried that in 80's when people were starting to die from AIDS, but it took groups like ACT-UP to get attention.
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Deja Q Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:32 AM
Response to Reply #1
51. And if it weren't for the Stonewall Riots, we'd all still be in the closet
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LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 09:35 AM
Response to Reply #51
76. Was Fired for Being Gay
To make it even better, the manager "thought" I was, so snooped through my bag and found a card from my girlfriend. I couldn't do ANYTHING about it -- no state or fed laws. It was Waldenbooks. I'LL REPEAT WALDENBOOKS. When I called up their corporate HR office, I was told I had been fired for STEALING. I was wtf? That was what my manager had put on the termination form... Ask me if I've EVER been in a Waldenbooks since then, or my family?

BTW, this wasn't 50 years ago or anything, this was in 1992.
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youngred Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 10:45 PM
Response to Original message
2. There is a difference here though
Edited on Tue Dec-28-04 10:50 PM by youngred
attacking the memory of reggie white, making cracks about Reagan's alzheimers, making up lies, or reveling in the misfortune of others is wrong.

Pointing out the evil ways of our opponents, spreading some exaggerated stories, hitting them hard on the issues in plain language are ok.

It's a fine line you have to walk, but there is a difference between playing politics hard and playing politics dirty.

Even as a white, middle-class, male, catholic I've been attacked (my ex-gfs mother was virulently anti-catholic and would say some the cruelest things to me). For that and my liberalism I have been on the recieving end of prejudice. Bullying, for no other reason than I wasn't as big as the other kids. But I don't need to feel oppressed to know that I shouldn't do that to other people and that no one should
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itzamirakul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:08 PM
Response to Reply #2
13. Youngred, from your last paragraph...
I can only say, "You are a better man than I, Gunga Din." (Meant very seriously)

What good does it do to play "hard" politics when the other side is playing "dirty" politics AND WINNING?
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youngred Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 10:26 AM
Response to Reply #13
81. because
the problem isn't with their playing dirty politics, though it certainly helps them win. The problem is we've allowed them to edge us out on message, defines us, define themselves and set up a storyline about themselves that makes them look good. Make no mistake these former CEOs all know their marketing and they know how to exploit people. If we can turn that back people will begin to see that dirty politics is ugly and turn on it. Part of the reason that no one other than Laura Bush escaped this presidential race with positive likablity numbers is because of the way they all attacked each other so viciously, and from their side with false facts.
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Alyssa Donating Member (31 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:13 PM
Response to Reply #2
15. Prejudice
I have been the recipient of anti-white prejudice in Korea and Japan, in Northern Alaska from Eskimos in a number of places from blacks
and from anti-Catholicism in a number of places.

I don't take it too seriously since I assume that it's a more or less universal attitude which I make an effort not to return. I wish I were as successful in my inner thoughts as I am in controlling my outward expressions.

Since humans seem to be somewhat imperfect it's hard to expect this to be eliminated except within a religious context which sees all humans as children of God. But I don't expect that to happen universally next week some time.
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youngred Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 10:29 AM
Response to Reply #15
82. the only person I can control is myself
I try not to let it get to me, and instead be what they don't expect me to be, and if that goes a ways towards breaking their prejudice then I have done a good thing I think.

I don't necessarily think we need a religious context for us to realise we are all the same, though for me it is part of what gives me that belief. This is one area in which religion is a very very positive force for good (when it's not being twisted against 'infidels').

It's a long path, but we must walk it
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FreakinDJ Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 10:48 PM
Response to Original message
3. Have you ever been to Georgia
dumb question there
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Royal Observer Donating Member (168 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 10:49 PM
Response to Original message
4. I agree
We should get down in the gutter with our switch blades and cut their knees off. Fuck Pollyanna, who ever she is. Bigot will alway meet an untimely end, we should see to it!
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itzamirakul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:28 PM
Response to Reply #4
22. Funny!
Thanks...this thread needed some levity. LOL
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Royal Observer Donating Member (168 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 01:12 AM
Response to Reply #22
63. Levity
is in the eye of the beholder.
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demosincebirth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 10:51 PM
Response to Original message
5. As a minority, you bet I have.
Edited on Tue Dec-28-04 10:52 PM by augie38
I've said it before, you have to get down in the mud with those *uckers! I learned that long time ago when union organizing in the W.Coast, in the '60's. "Nice guys finish last," always.
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InvisibleBallots Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:26 PM
Response to Reply #5
21. union organizer?
We need more of your type augie!
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NYC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 10:56 PM
Response to Original message
6. I agree with you.
You said:
First, I think our continually taking the "high road" instead of getting down in the gutter and doing some real switchblade slashing is what lost us this presidential election. The Republicans stay in the gutter and cut us off at the knees constantly while we play Pollyanna and keep looking vainly for the day that they will "play fair." They could give a damn less how badly they hurt us or our families and friends in ANY situation. So when I gloat over a loss or problem that they may be having, what the hell do I care if I seem to be "as bad as they are?"

As far as criticizing Reagan's Alzheimer's, he had it while he was in office. Why not criticize? He was doing us a serious disservice.
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itzamirakul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:19 PM
Response to Reply #6
16. This is what I had to say about Reagan's Alzheimer's...
The man lied and lied and lied while he was in office. Now, the problem with his lying was that, like Bush at the debates, he was trying to remember what he had memorized - the script that had been written for him, because in all reality, Reagan didn't know what the hell was going on. He was trying to remember what lie he had told the last time every time he had a press conference, and if you remember, he ended up stumbling through those press conferences, contradicting himself and sounding very much like a dolt. That is the reason that Rove doesn't allow Bush to hold press conferences.

I think that Reagan had to memorize so many lies and then remember to whom, when, where and under what circumstances he had told those lies, that his brain finally gave out and he just forgot EVERYTHING.

Did he get what he deserved? Depends on whether you believe in getting down in the gutter with a switchblade or just being empathic with an old man "who really was good at heart even though he did some very evil things".

Now, if that is mean of me to say...then so be it.
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NYC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:38 PM
Response to Reply #16
32. No one who is good at heart does very evil things.
...Depends on whether you believe in getting down in the gutter with a switchblade or just being empathic with an old man "who really was good at heart even though he did some very evil things"...

I just don't believe that.
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itzamirakul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:19 AM
Response to Reply #32
46. Me neither n/t
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tx_dem41 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:35 AM
Response to Reply #6
52. You ask..."Why not criticize?"
Edited on Wed Dec-29-04 12:36 AM by tx_dem41
Because most of the criticism involves making fun of people with Alzheimer's...not just criticizing Reagan. For people who have dealt with loved ones with Alzheimer's on a daily basis, and seen the devastation it causes, we find it hurtful...and hateful, no matter the reason.
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NYC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:46 AM
Response to Reply #52
59. Wrong.
The man was president while he had Alzheimer's. Even the Republicans should have resented that.

His Alzheimer's was no excuse to do the country harm.
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tx_dem41 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:48 AM
Response to Reply #59
60. And his Alzheimer's is no excuse...
for making fun of the symptoms of this horrific disease.
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NYC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 01:07 AM
Response to Reply #60
62. Who was making fun of the disease?
Reagan deserves criticism with or without Alzheimer's. Alzheimer's does not exempt Reagan from criticism. And nobody with Alzheimer's should be president of the United States.
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NightTrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 10:59 PM
Response to Original message
7. Although I'm a white male, I think I have been.
I was one of the kids who got picked on a lot in school. I guess it was because I wasn't athletic and have always had a gentle-looking face. So I was constantly called "faggot," "wimp," and the like throughout junior and senior high school.

Whether or not that counts as bigotry, I'm not sure. That's up to you to decide.
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itzamirakul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:25 PM
Response to Reply #7
20. I think a bigot is someone who is
intolerant. Perhaps someone else has a different definition. But intolerance can be against a religion, a race, a gender, a physical aspect and I guess a lot of other things...so I would imagine that you fit the pattern of someone who has experienced bigotry. I guess some people might say that there are 'DEGREES" of bigotry, but we don't need to go that far.
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Az Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 10:59 PM
Response to Original message
8. Religious hatred and racism
Myself and my property have been assaulted numerous times because of religious intolerance to atheists.

I have also been on the recieving end of racism due to being at one time or another 1/2 of a mixed couple.
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Tomee450 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:00 PM
Response to Original message
9. Let me ask you this.
I, an African American, have been on the receiving end of many,many acts of bigotry. Should I hate every white person who has discriminated against me, or has hurled the N word at me? Should I hate Strom Thurmond, Jesse Helms, George Wallace and others who have said and done terrible things to black people? Should I have shouted for joy when Wallace and Thurmond died? Should I long for Helm's to die? I think not. Black people, by your logic, should be hating a lot of people. I think Democrats should be tough, should not be afraid to criticize, but wishing an adversary dead or rejoicing upon his death is just sickening, IMHO.
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Alyssa Donating Member (31 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:24 PM
Response to Reply #9
18. Prejudice
Appreciate your post Tomee. Keep your strength of character. BTW I don't know what IMHO means, could you tell me please?
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Tomee450 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:32 PM
Response to Reply #18
27. Thanks
IMHO = IN MY HUMBLE OPINION
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Alyssa Donating Member (31 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:34 PM
Response to Reply #27
30. IMHO
Thanks for the info, Tomee.
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itzamirakul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:33 PM
Response to Reply #18
29. IMHO = In My Honest Opinion n/t
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Alyssa Donating Member (31 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:36 PM
Response to Reply #29
31. IMHO
Thanks itzamirakul. Seems as though there's some minor variation in the definition, but both of them seem to mean roughly the same thing.
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itzamirakul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:48 PM
Response to Reply #31
35. Alyssa: BTW (By the Way) :)
Welcome to DU
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DemBones DemBones Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:58 PM
Response to Reply #9
41. I agree with you Tomee450. You can't get back at all the haters

in the world, there isn't time, and it is both sick and sickening to gloat over anyone's death.

I didn't shed any tears over Reagan's death, I know the harm he did, having lived through the Reagan Error, but his kids loved him and a couple of them seem pretty decent. My philosophy is to let people mourn their dead and keep your mouth shut if you can't say something nice about the deceased.

While they're still living, though, criticize them as much as they deserve if not more. Give 'em Hell, as Harry used to.
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nascarblue Donating Member (693 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:04 PM
Response to Original message
10. Am I the only one who's noticed more than a few accidental Dem deaths?
I never hear about Repugs dying. There was that Dem that made the paper trail voting machines. There was another Senator as well. A plane crash? I remember Reagan and thats about it. But we all knew that was coming. They screamed about Stem Cell for years until old Ronnie was dying. I don't remember anyone laughing about Ronnie dying and his administration had alot of the same crooks behind the Chimp and PNAC.
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RUDUing2 Donating Member (968 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 10:15 AM
Response to Reply #10
80. I still believe that Ashcroft had something to do w/Mel Carnahans plane
Edited on Wed Dec-29-04 10:20 AM by RUDUing2
crash. I don't think anything will ever convince me otherwise..and most especially not the *finding* of pilot error on his sons part. Nope no way..uh uh. Mel would have defeated Ashcroft and eventually ran for president and won. He was a cross between Truman and Clinton..Trumans toughness and integrity and Clintons likeability and ability to connect w/the *common* person...
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HEyHEY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:05 PM
Response to Original message
11. Yep, English person in Quebec
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HEyHEY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:05 PM
Response to Original message
12. Yep, English person in Quebec
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bettyellen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:11 PM
Response to Original message
14. yep, as an Irish woman in London.
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Forever Free Donating Member (542 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:20 PM
Response to Reply #14
17. Yup I have, sadly in grade school
As an Asian American, the bigotry isn't as bad as that afflicting African Americans or GLBT Americans, but yeah I'm aware of it in my life.

Although i'll say this, for the most part, people where i live (Southern California) are wonderful nice people. There are just a few ignorant bigots that are still out there spreading their hate.
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Orangepeel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:25 PM
Response to Original message
19. making fun of dead people won't win any elections...
your second reason for harshly criticizing a dead person has validity. It is human nature to hate people who hate you and to take some pleasure at their misfortune. I don't like it, I think it makes "us" look bad, and I try not to do it, but, it is perfectly understandable, reasonable behavior.

Your first reason is silly. Republicans don't beat us because they laugh at dead liberals (although, of course, they do). They win because of plenty of low road behavior -- lying, cheating, bullying, making fun of our candidates, etc. Whether or not Democrats need to emulate that behavior is a debatable question. It's lousy, but it wins. But, it only makes sense to emulate the lousy practices that actually get votes.
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itzamirakul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:44 PM
Response to Reply #19
34. You think it is silly that we take
the "high road" while the Republicans are in the gutter with knives, axes, swords and all manner of deadly weapons, cutting our legs out from under us? I don't remember saying that they beat us by laughing at dead people...BUT...as you say...THEY DO!

You say, "..."it only makes sense to emulate the lousy practices that actually get votes." Well, they COMBINE all that lousy behavior. And that behavior along with all the other dirty stuff they do combines to make one very NASTY package that whips the shit out of us while we whistle in the wind and look at the clouds floating by. Being, meanwhile, very fair and filled with integrity.

So after they continually kick our asses at the polls, at least everyone can walk away and say, "They may have lost, but those Democrats are such NICE PEOPLE!"



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Orangepeel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:00 AM
Response to Reply #34
42. no, that's not what I'm saying
I'm saying that

1. republicans engage in some nasty behavior that helps them win elections
2. republicans engage in some nasty behavior that has nothing to do with winning elections
3. emulating the nasty behavior that helps them win elections may indeed help us win elections, too (although whether or not THAT behavior should be emulated is debatable and should be the subject of another thread)
4. emulating the nasty behavior that has nothing to do with winning elections is just nasty

Harshly criticizing dead people is an example of #2
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sam sarrha Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:28 PM
Response to Original message
23. Yea, a black supervisor at Boeing ragged on my sorry white ass so bad that
The KKK tried to recruit me after work one day.. she would get tanked up at lunch then bitch out all the older white guys.. she had been suspended 3 times and rehired after she completed her required anger management course... never did much good..

i filed harassment and prejudice complaints on her and they fired me...there were 15 people who backed me up.. they knew what was going on, you could hear her bitch me out and threaten me all over the plant when she got going. there was another black guy in charge of the plant..i sorta like him but he backed her up.

i got fired alot in elpaso tx when the mexicans ganged up on me and got me fired to hire one of their friends.. on more than one job. one job they just told me to quit or they kick my ass after work.
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LadyRaivan Donating Member (39 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 11:57 AM
Response to Reply #23
96. In a way...
...I think it's good that we get a taste of what our 'ethnic group' doled out for so many years, but on the other hand...I've never behaved that way, so why should I be made to suffer for what others have done? I had a boss a few years ago who was black and had four employees: two white women, one black woman, and one Hispanic male. She let the black woman get away with doing next to nothing even though she constantly received complaints about her, but she worked the other three to death (I was one of the white women). We were all given deadlines, but the black woman was never held to them....just us. I actually had her threaten me with cancelling my vacation if I didn't make a deadline. She (the boss) also disappeared around 2:30 every day and no one knew where she was (home). Her boss' secretary even called me one day to ask if I knew where she was. She would always leave her office light and computer on so it just looked like she stepped out for a moment. They were afraid to do anything because they knew she'd sue.

So, yes.
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Maiden England Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:29 PM
Response to Original message
24. Yes I have thank you very much
I am a Jew, and I was the only Jewish person most of the kids at my school had ever met. I grew up in the UK, where there is no separation of church and state, and so morning assembly in school requires the Lord's Prayer to be said. Well, it does set you apart just a tad when you are the only person in 500 kids to get up and walk out of assembly every day. So yeah, I experienced my fair share.

It only taught me that hate is such a pointless emotion. I always stood up for myself, but I was never mean and hateful. It is possible to defend oneself against ignorance and hatred, without resorting to vicious personal and flat out mean-spirited behavior.

There is a vast difference between saying 'while I appreciate that Reggie White is being honored for his talents on the sporting field, I personally found his stance on gay rights to be inciteful of hatred, he was ill-informed and very offensive toward many minority groups, so when you look back on his life and think about him, that should be part of your memory' and saying 'boy I'm glad that biggoted piece of shit is dead, I'm going to piss on his grave'.
One way is intelligent and serves to educate yet still carries compassion. One way is full of hatred and serves only to further hatred.
Yes we should always stand up and speak to defend ourselves, of course we should. But what purpose does it serve to defend ourselves with the same kind of mean-spirited hatred used against us. The point is, you are never going to change the mind of a bigot, you just aren't, but someone is always watching, someone, who is not a bigot, just uneducated, open to persuasion, always watching. Those are the people you reach out to, they walk away with the lesson that the bigot was rude and hatful and you/the jew/the homosexual/the black/the asian/the pick your minority was 'the kind of person you actually liked' strong and determined but full of compasion and just like every other decent person you know. They go off with an opened mind, they teach their children that gays/jews/blacks/whoever are no different, etc, etc, until the bigots die the heck out.

Hatred begets hatred, and until we all 'get it' there'll be plenty to go around.
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youngred Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 10:38 AM
Response to Reply #24
84. you inadvertantly hit on a huge point
when talking about Reggie White. The time it takes to talk about the negative and the positive and deliniate between the two (the seeing of gray in a complex legacy) is lost in today's 8 second clip culture, whereas saying he was a bigoted piece of shit takes no time at all and appeals to the bias of people. Kerry made this even worse by being naturally long-winded in explaining complex topics. Bush has a huge strength for brevity and soundbites and this helps them.
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readmylips Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:31 PM
Response to Original message
25. Yes, Brunette Latin woman...
married to white man for 25 years. Last time bigotry came to my door step? Last month a woman came to my door giving out real estate information. I was working in my front garden and saw her coming. She extended the papers and told me 'for the owner.' 'I'm the owner.' I said. She asked, 'can you read?' 'What kind of fucking question is that? Do you ask that question of all dark skin people?' I'm college educated, I can see you have no fucking education, now get the fuck off my property and take your shit information with you, bitch!'

I was so damn furious.
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HEyHEY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:32 PM
Response to Reply #25
26. That't insane where the hell do you live?
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readmylips Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:48 PM
Response to Reply #26
37. Gilbert, AZ...
Rich, white community. We're not financially deprived.
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Az Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 01:00 AM
Response to Reply #37
61. What?
Oh! Arizona.... er never mind.
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manic expression Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:33 PM
Response to Original message
28. You can
win without getting "down in the gutters". The trick is to use our abilities better. We need to stand tall and fight hard from that position. "Good guys" (I hate using "good guys" or "bad guys", but I do this so people can get what I mean) can be strong, fierce and unrelenting and win.
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itzamirakul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:54 PM
Response to Reply #28
39. "strong, fierce and unrelenting....
like Bush? :)
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manic expression Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:41 AM
Response to Reply #39
54. Hey... I didn't say
criminal, disgusting, horrible, base, despicable, wrong, vile, etc, etc.... So of course it's not like Bush!
I just was trying to say that we can take the moral high road while defending what we believe in, among other related things (just for clarification).
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Ladyhawk Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:39 PM
Response to Original message
33. Yes, as a woman...
...from this guy: Rico Oller
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itzamirakul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 07:51 AM
Response to Reply #33
70. Ladyhawk: I followed the link and
saw that he is a Republican running for office. What kind of bigoted behavior did he show you?
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Ladyhawk Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Dec-30-04 04:46 AM
Response to Reply #70
99. If you want to know I can send you a link to a short story I wrote...
...involving him. I've known him most of my life and well...I found out he's pretty much an asswipe.

LH
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Javaman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:48 PM
Response to Original message
36. Yes, believe it or not, as a bald man
I got hired by a production company in L.A. as a production assistant years ago. I am naturally bald do to a genetic condition called Alopecia.
Anyway, the first day there, the manager tells me to wear a hat, because some people may get the wrong idea about me.
I asked him what idea that was?
He said they may think I was a skin head.
I was speechless.
I tried to explain what my condition was, and he just waved me off and told me to wear a hat.
Next day, sans hat, I walked into his office.
He asked wear my hat was, I told him, it was 105 degrees outside, I'm not going to get wear a hat.
He tried to intimidate me, it didn't work. At the time, I stood 6'2" 185 pounds of muscle against this fat "balding" idiot.
I told him to make me.
He shut up and that was the end of that. He was a misplaced Texas redneck in liberal hollwood.
What a colossal jack ass.
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Geek_Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:51 PM
Response to Original message
38. I have
as a Latin woman going to a predominately white school I was called the S word on several occasions and the N word even. I felt helpless and had a very low self esteem.

I now live in the south and occasional get the sense that someone may be bigoted toward me. But I mostly just pitty them because bigotry is really a symptom of ignorance and I just can't hate them because in an odd way they are victims themselves.
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Lydia Leftcoast Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 11:57 PM
Response to Original message
40. Yes, as a Caucasian in Japan
Most Japanese people have been wonderful, but every nation has its bigots, I suppose, and I encountered some stereotypes in Japan, as well as one outright example of discrimination.

As a then-twentysomething blonde, I had to contend with the fact that Japanese porno comic books are full of blonde nymphomaniacs. I never before or since received so many outright crude propositions or ran into so many perverts.

I also received some downright odd remarks from people. Undressing at the public bath, I was approached by an intense young woman who said, "You took your skirt off over your head instead of down like pants." "Yes, what of it?" "You're in that habit because Americans wear shoes inside the house and have dirty floors." "No, I do that because Americans have wider hips than Japanese do."

But the outright example of discrimination came when I was trying to find a place for a visiting friend to stay. There was an entertainment complex owned by a labor union right near my apartment, and on one visit, I noticed that they had rooms for rent. I went to inquire and was told flat out that they didn't rent to foreigners. I tried to give them the benefit of the doubt, so I asked if they meant that they rented only to union members. No, they repeated, they just didn't rent to foreigners.

I had heard of such incidents, but when it happened to me, I was surprised at how shocked and angry I felt. Then I realized, "This is the type of thing that people of color go through all the time in the U.S."

Of course, I was not happy to encounter silly stereotypes or accommodations run by bigots, but I wish that every Caucasian American could have the experience of living in a country where Caucasians are in the minority.
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DemBones DemBones Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:10 AM
Response to Reply #40
44. As a very fair-skinned blonde child, living in

the Philippines was an interesting experience. Filipinos, even adults, would follow me around when I went to the market, and sometimes come up and touch my hair or skin to see how it felt. I understood it but it made me uncomfortable because I was shy.

The one about taking your skirt off in the Japanese bath is really a hoot! It's always weird when someone totally misinterprets something you do.
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Fleshdancer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:28 AM
Response to Reply #40
49. I had a hard time with renting in Japan too because I wasn't Japanese
Several people refused my husband and I when we were apartment hunting because we were not Japanese. Some agreed to interview us since we were American...not sure if that would happen today though.
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:01 AM
Response to Original message
43. in England, as a child
lots of anti-American sentiment during the Viet nam war
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jonnyblitz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:18 AM
Response to Original message
45. I have been chased with a baseball bat in a major city as a gay
guy hanging around a bunch of other gay guys in a "gay area". I don't buy that "turn the other cheek" crap others try to "preach' AT ALL. not one bit.
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tx_dem41 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:22 AM
Response to Reply #45
48. So...we should dance on the graves of the dead?
I'm sorry, I don't see the connection.
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jonnyblitz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:41 AM
Response to Reply #48
55. what are you talking about?!?!
Edited on Wed Dec-29-04 12:42 AM by jonnyblitz
who said anything about dancing on the graves of the dead? I said I am NOT going to let people BASH ME and remain SILENT about it. jesus fucking christ, I am surrounded! :crazy:
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tx_dem41 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:45 AM
Response to Reply #55
56. Jonnyblitz...I apologize if I assumed this thread...
addressed the Reggie White threads. I apologize for the assumption.
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tx_dem41 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:21 AM
Response to Original message
47. I don't think it makes us as "bad as the dittoheads"...it makes us bad..
human beings.
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Deja Q Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:32 AM
Response to Original message
50. Yes I have. From medical 'professionals' to bullies to religious hatred.
Both 'Christian' and 'Muslim', but that's not my problem. I live by doing, not by parroting.
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wicket Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 08:25 AM
Response to Reply #50
74. medical professionals???
Man, that really sucks :( What the hell is their problem??
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cleofus1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:40 AM
Response to Original message
53. yeah....
does a bear shit in the woods? does the pope wear a funny hat?
for the most part it is disguised these days...back in the good old days people were pretty open about it...now it's guised in arguments about how people get what they deserve...and of course white people rise to the top because they are better...and black people get tossed in jail more frequently because they are more prone to be criminals and Latin women have lots of babies out of wedlock because they are whores...I hear it all the time...sometimes in public...sometimes in private...lots of times on the radio and even on TV...I remember getting my ass kicked in Orange county back in the early eighties by a small group of white High School kids...they kept calling me a beaner and asking me if I was "lost"...very humiliating...I used to get that "lost" thing all the time in california...like I'm not supposed to be in certain geographic locations...the cops used to do that to me all the time..."so what are you doing here? you lost?"
one time I asked my boss if i could go to work part time so i could go to college...he said he'd talk to me later about it. I went up front later in the day to pick up a load of stuff to work on and the place was packed with rich tall white people dressed in jewels and Krugerrand rings...i picked up the load of stuff and turned to go to the back and he kicked me in the ass and then said out loud for everyone to hear...beaners don't go to college...beaners work in the back! everyone started laughing...rich white people laughing at my misery like i was some sort of comedy show on TV...working in orange county was a nightmare...but i was harassed everywhere at some point...yesireee...nothing like a little racism in the morning...don't think it doesn't exist...it does...damn right it does...
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Behind the Aegis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:46 AM
Response to Original message
57. My thoughts
I am personally sick of those who apologize for the comments made by bigots and classify them as "misspeaks!" A bigot is a bigot! I do not rejoice in the death of anyone, but I am not saddened either when a hateful person dies. What has pissed me off is the amount of victimization of some of the DUers on here, as if THEY were under attack...get a FUCKING life!

As for your first point, I agree. We are "too nice" and it gets us in trouble because we get our asses handed to us! There is nothing wrong with getting down and dirty! We just need to do it honestly. I think we could have won with the truth about some of these people, but our leaders thought it would be "unseemly." The truth hurts! We should have hurt them with the truth, as they brought it on themselves. But, we sat around and allowed LIES to be thrown around as if it were the truth! We are already down because we do not have the MSM in our corner, so we have to fight that much harder!

Your second question could be a novel for me! I am short, gay, from a Jewish family, a practicing pagan, and a liberal in Oklahoma. So asking if I have been discriminated against is like asking does a bear shit in the woods. You betcha! I could break up the discrimination into various categories from name-calling to death threats that required police protection (that was actually kinda cool...heehee).

Finally, just because one has been a victim does not entitle that person to make more victims. However, that also doesn't mean we should have to be sorrowful when a bigot dies and pretend we feel a great sadness.
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itzamirakul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 07:45 AM
Response to Reply #57
69. That's exactly what I was trying to say...
"There's nothing wrong with getting down and dirty...but our leaders thought it would be unseemly."

When your attacker is throwing dynamite, you can't hit him back with a feather pillow! That's being sum dum fuk.

I tried to explain that the winning package the Republicans use is made up of ALL these nasty tricks, including making fun of those things that they KNOW will hurt us and they COUNT ON our being too weak and namby-pamby and high-minded to hit back with our own nasty tricks.

I appreciate the loving kindness and fair-play ideals that so many of our Democratic friends have, but we have to wake up and realize that this is no longer the "flower-child" generation that we are dealing with.
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rexcat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:46 AM
Response to Original message
58. Try being an Atheist in America...
need I say anymore!
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Royal Observer Donating Member (168 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 01:21 AM
Response to Reply #58
65. How do people know
that you are an atheist? Do you bring it up or do they ask you?
I ask because nobody has ever asked me if I am an atheist.
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 10:00 AM
Response to Reply #65
78. people often ask me what my religion is....
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Royal Observer Donating Member (168 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 11:36 AM
Response to Reply #78
92. I live in SoCal
People rarely if ever ask you what your religion is.
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Kathy in Cambridge Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 11:53 AM
Response to Reply #92
95. It's considered rude where I live to ask someone's religion
no one really cares one way or he other.
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Taxloss Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 11:19 AM
Response to Reply #65
88. I feel atheism can be tough at times
and I feel a bit discriminated against when I have to tick "other/please specify" or whatever. But for me that is a very minor concern.
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Royal Observer Donating Member (168 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 11:39 AM
Response to Reply #88
93. I don't mind
ticking 'other'. Kinda' like it. If they say, "Specify", I put down, "What do you need?"
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Lenape85 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 01:19 AM
Response to Original message
64. I was teased at my old boarding school for being Native American
This one really rich kid who was a total dumbass went up to me and started mocking me, calling me big chief and all that stuff and threatening to scalp me with a tomahawk
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Royal Observer Donating Member (168 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 01:27 AM
Response to Reply #64
66. When I was a kid, long, long ago
in a distant galaxy, we used to tease kids for being Indian givers. We didn't know what a Native American was. We probably thought we were ones.
We used to walk Indian file. Things were weird back then.
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Piperay Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 04:57 AM
Response to Original message
67. Yes as a Caucasian who looks Hispanic
I have had some ugly remarks directed my way. :mad:

I think that we need to get down in the dirt with the repugs because being the nice guy is getting us nowhere.
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KharmaTrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 06:37 AM
Response to Original message
68. Biogtry, Prejudice? Intollerance!
Being Jewish, I was conditioned from birth to expect prejudice and have encountered several episodes of Anti-semetism (living in small towns)...most by people who didn't realize they were reciting old wives tales and other lies that had been passed down by generations. It never amazed how I would run into non-Jews when I was in college (people they had never met before) and how I was looked at like a stranger from another planet...in their world I was.

I seperate bigotry...the outright practice of exclusion, racism & sexism...where a person deliberately takes action against another as compared to prejudice which I see as more passive and based primarily on ignorance. Some of these people can never release those misconceptions, but I see that as the environment they live in.

That leads to other types of intolerance I've experienced...ranging from not liking the right music or wearing the "hip clothes" (not being accepted by your peers is early intolerance) or wasn't "sophisticated" enough for others. I will say I've experienced discrimination when I worked with in a LGBT environment. I was "the breeder" and was one of "them" since I was married and had children. One person specifically told me that because I wasn't gay I could never be really trusted. So, intolerance comes in all shapes.

I've found myself stuck in prejudices over the years and have always tried to try on their shoes before I make a judgement. Today, I can firmly say the only prejudice I hold are to Repugnicans and their deliberate destruction of our society for their own self interests.
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The Zanti Regent Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 07:53 AM
Response to Original message
71. Every day
I'm an Orthodox Jew working in a large office. I have been denied promotions and opportunities because of my religion. A former supervisor told me point blank that if I did not accept Jesus as my Savior, I wouldn't get anywhere. I called the EEOC and Management tried to fire me. I went to my union and they refused to help me. I had to hire an attorney and go after both management and the union.

Sadly the biggest amount of antisemitism comes from Hispanics and especially African Americans. I hear on a daily basis that the Jews ran the slave trade (which is false) and other ilk.

I try to look for work elsewhere, but I'm 49. The stock phrase I hear is "sorry, but you're too old to work".
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cleofus1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 07:59 AM
Response to Reply #71
72. deleted by request
Edited on Wed Dec-29-04 08:29 AM by cleofus1
nt
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VaYallaDawg Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 08:21 AM
Response to Original message
73. What's scary is when the ballot box becomes the instrument of bigotry.
Gay people are now the first officially elected pariahs in the US, thanks to KKKarl Rove's election strategies in several states. Who knows which group will be next. Maybe Black people, maybe Jews. Anybody who is "un-Christian" (with that being defined in some very peculiar ways). What about single moms?

Oh, and let's not forget the intellectuals! Rumor has it there are scores of them on one of those intenets called the DU or something like that - they're always squabbling with each other, and they are definitely going to be troublesome and subversive!!
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JNelson6563 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 09:03 AM
Response to Original message
75. Yes, as a gentile woman
At a trade show many years ago with my mom, we went to a table that had some wares we were interested in. As we stood there the man kept walking past us and ignoring us. He had the hat and the hair curls around the side of his face (Hassidic-sp?-Jew). I began to grow confused, wondering if he was blind or something and just didn't see us. After a time we left and my mom whispered to me that it was because we were gentile women. None of the men at the booth would look at us and our "excuse me's" were ignored. I was stunned.

We went elsewhere and spent lots of money.

Julie
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 09:43 AM
Response to Original message
77. someone told me and my girl that we were going to get aids and die.
it was weirder cos they even got the stereotype wrong.
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RUDUing2 Donating Member (968 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 10:12 AM
Response to Original message
79. as a catholic who has lived in both southern Missouri and South Carolina..
sure have.

As for the other part of the post. When you stoop to their level then you become like them. When you return bigotry and intolerance w/bigotry and intolerance then all you are doing is showing that you are an intolerant bigot, just of a different type. You don't want to do away with bigotry and intolerance, you just want to change who they are directed towards. How does this country benefit if all we do is exchange one group of intolerant bigots for another?
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pdxmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 10:33 AM
Response to Original message
83. I haven't but my husband has
And it hurts just as much when it's directed towards a loved one. My husband is an amputee. He wears a prosthesis, so it isn't always obvious, but when people find out, it amazes and stuns me how so many people change their treatment of him.

We've been through everything from people leaving him nasty, anonymous notes on his windshield when he's parked in a handicapped spot, to little kids calling him a monster in the grocery store while mommy just stands there. It's taught to kids from the time they're little....or at least tolerated. I don't see how it can change until that cycle is broken.
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 10:42 AM
Response to Reply #83
85. yikes!!! thats terrible....why are people leaving anonymous notes?
its just so bizarre
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pdxmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 11:09 AM
Response to Reply #85
86. My guess is ignorance
They'll leave him notes saying "You're not handicapped." and "Stop taking up space." The most recent was just 3 weeks ago. They see him at work, wearing his prosthesis, I suppose, and don't understand what kind of work it is to have to walk around like that. Any decrease in his walking helps him last longer throughout the day.

I just don't see why, if they have a problem or question, they can't just talk to him. Every time he gets one of these, he's bummed out for days.
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yorkiemommie1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 11:16 AM
Response to Original message
87. yes, as an asian in socal
during the late 70s and early 80s. and esp. when there was so much animosity against Japan during its buying spree here. i always came back at them, too, either by yelling, or in one instance, blowing my police whistle.

doesn't happen any more. too many asians in my city now.
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Cuban_Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 11:23 AM
Response to Original message
89. Gay and Hispanic, so make mine a double 'yes'. n/t
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Walt Starr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 11:23 AM
Response to Original message
90. Yes, religious bigotry
I am openly Pagan and lived in an extremely fundie Christian area which resulted in physical violence on one occasion which the sheriff of the county where the violence occurred refused to do anything about.
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William Bloode Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 11:30 AM
Response to Original message
91. Yes i have......
In my area of the Appalachians being Cherokee or at least having it in your heritage is looked upon as normal, and maybe a blessing.I never experienced it personally here, mostly from old T.V. movies or old serial westerns where we natives are displayed as ignorant savages.

This did not hold a candle to when i met my sisters in-laws. i actually had to hear and listen to remarks made in my company about "you lazy natives" "you dirty ignorant sumabithches". These folks were actually sitting in front of me having a good ol' time running me and my kind into the ground. They had no idea my sister and i are both 3/4's Tsalangi.

I just got up, asked them how it felt having a nice mixing of dirty native blood introduced into their family? I then asked my sister why she wanted to marry into such a bigoted household, told the rest in the house if they would like to continue to trash me and my brethren, they could come outside and do so.

I left, and have not seen them since, they are not welcome in my house. They are also banned from my parents house, and pretty much all my other relatives.

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Solly Mack Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:19 PM
Response to Reply #91
98. I can relate. I was once told my mother must have married up
when she, 1/2 tsalagi, married my father.


We were all tow-headed as children and way lighter than our mom. People would often assume she was our babysitter.

My paternal grandmother's family were/are multi-racial. Very tall, dark skinned woman. She gave birth to my blonde hair blue-eyed father. You can well imagine the comments they got walking about 1930's Georgia.

My mother-in-law was worried a grandchild from me would produce a dark skinned child. My husband and I were married for many years before either of us spoke to her again. His father we point blank have nothing to do with, but his mom later apologised. I still can't connect with her though. Her early words sealed it for me.

We always held family reunions in a well-known park in Atlanta. Passer-bys would stare and you could tell they never quite knew what they were seeing.. if it was a family reunion or a collection of strangers. No need for words as their faces said it all.





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LadyRaivan Donating Member (39 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 11:45 AM
Response to Original message
94. Check out the brain trust....
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Lorien Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-29-04 12:05 PM
Response to Original message
97. Sure I have. As a woman working in corporate America
I've consistantly been paid less than my male peers, even when given far more high priority jobs, done more quickly and accurately. Even worse, I TRAINED many of my male peers who make 20% or more than I do, and who have worked for far fewer years for the company. When I've confronted my employer, they told me "well, you're a woman; you can get married and have a man take care of you. Men need to support families". When I pointed out that most of my peers were UNmarried men, and that my mom raised my sister and I alone because our dad ran out on us, the answer was "well, guys just need more stuff". Oh really? is that why women pay 35% more for the same pair of jeans, or drycleaning for a pair of slacks? Or twice as much for a haircut? What about all the cash we spend for all the crap we need to look attactive enough to even be somewhat accepted by society? If I could die today and be reincarnated as a man tomorrow, I would do it in a heartbeat. Being a woman ANYWHERE pretty much sucks.
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